Why does it have to be this way?

[Jimmy]

My g/f of three years broke up with me about six months ago but I have been emotionally paralyzed since then. I loved her very much but I fully realize the relationship was not completely right. But that doesn't take away any of the pain. Everybody asks how do I get over it but I want to know WHY does it have to be painful in the first place? Why is it that when we are in love in the happiest state of our lives, it can turn sour so quickly and become a nightmare? Is this the way it was meant to be? (And, by the way, if you can give me some words to help me move past this I would appreciate that as well)

[Stephanie]

In life I believe that we all get hurt at one or maybe more than one point. I know because I have been hurt A LOT! It takes a lot of time to get over someone that u love, and think u are going to spend the rest of your life with. All I can really tell u is it is going to take time. There is nothing i can really tell U to make the pain go away because it is going to be there no matter what! Just keep your self busy, and really try to stay away from her because it will only make it harder if u see her. Read a book, go out with your friends, meet new people, just have fun and eventually u will forget it, But it will take time.

[Wendy]

My g/f of three years broke up with me about six months ago but I have been emotionally paralyzed since then. I loved her very much but I fully realize the relationship was not completely right. But that doesn't take away any of the pain. Everybody asks how do I get over it but I want to know WHY does it have to be painful in the first place? Why is it that when we are in love in the happiest state of our lives, it can turn sour so quickly and become a nightmare? Is this the way it was meant to be? (And, by the way, if you can give me some words to help me move past this I would appreciate that as well)

Break ups are painful because you put your heart and soul into the relationship and then when they leave you feel like you've lost a very important part of yourself. I think the pain is there to remind us what we felt for the other person and to let us know that we're alive. I would rather risk the hurt of losing someone, rather than go through life never feeling anything for anyone and playing it "safe." As far as getting over it, time will help. However, you need to take this time to look into yourself and find out who you really are and what makes you happy. Life is a learning experience, even when it hurts. You'll have your good days and your bad days, but each one will get a little easier. I hope I've helped in some way.