Am I making too much of this??

[semi spritzer]

Hi guys

 

I’m a late 30s gal seeing two yrs older male, not that seriously. We’re both working, no kids. During our 7 years which we’ve split up four times, he ended it once, me three times. Whenever he has come back, he says he misses me, is all over me, wants to take me here and there, then as time goes on it doesn't materialise. We’ve not met each other’s relations tho he’s met my brother and one of my girlfriends. He is an only child

 

We mostly cook meals and hang at each other’s places, watch films, discuss news topics etc. I would like to go out more tho it isn’t imperative. In the last two years I’ve become assertive if I feel taken for granted, I was meek before. Sometimes he critcises me for IMO minor things and I challenge him now cos I accept him as he is.

Both our parents seperated when we were kids so we each grew up with only one parent, his dad is now dead 12 years. He had a hateful relationship with his mum which he took out on me, I tolerated because I cared about him. They’re much better now.

 

What’s upsetting me is this - Four months ago we sat together as we were talking about pets, he mocked my parents' seperation (laughing that my dad's pet dog ran away just like my mum did). I got upset cos he thought it was good for a laugh and it wasn't easy for my dad to bring up two kids in my mum’s absence.

When I couldn't forget it I called him and said at least my parents were married before they had kids and this showed respect unlike his parents (recently he told me his parents were never married, I've always thought they were) to which he got angry and told me to F***-Off twice and hung up. I don’t really think badly of his parents but I was upset at what he said. I’ve never sworn at him tho he has at me before.

 

He dodged my calls afterwards for two months bcos he didn’t want to face my upset. When we eventually spoke on the phone (a month ago) he began arguing and threw stuff in my face that he didn’t care if I have only one parent in my life, it’s my family and my life, blah blah which hurt tremendously. He shouted he wanted an apology and said he wouldn’t apologise for swearing at me cos I kept shouting at him. I told him I don’t think he cares for me cos of what he said and I hung up.

 

Three weeks ago I phoned to apologise for what I said about his parents, he did the same for me that he felt ashamed after I explained my dad's struggles etc. He says he cares for me and wants to keep in touch tho he hasn't called. He does a houdini sometimes. I am still upset over him throwing my absent parent in my face and want an apology for this. Also if he doesn’t do same for swearing at me I won't see him again cos I think it’s off for a man to swear at a woman.

 

It’s been four months since we saw each other, I do like him and am very upset with it all. As time goes on I want to do less and less for him tho. Folks, am I making a mountain outta this?