I think that I'm in love with my friend (jelousy problems, and more..)

[Invideo]

Sorry for the long post.

 

Well first of all, I am 14 (male). Also I want to say that I am not really social, don't have self-confidence, and I think that is the main problem.

 

It all started 4 years ago, when I got into a new class. I was 11 then, and it was the first time I fell in love with her (I'll call her Sally). I was very young then (well still am but...), and it was a normal crush. After 2 months or so it was over. I was very quiet, and shy then.

 

A year ago, the main teacher of our class, "assigned" (can't find a better word) me to sit with her. (In my school, everyone is "assigned" where and with who to sit etc.). So, after 3 months or so, we became friends. Over the time she changed me really much, I'm not that shy, and not quiet at all now anymore. I still don't have enough self-confidence, but I have more then before. We mostly speak on MSN, because, well to shorten the story, we don't go out together. So, first we spoke normal on MSN and in school, like every other conversation. Then, we started to get more friendly with each other, and I even told her some of my biggest secrets, which I never told to anyone. I wasn't in love with her back then, by the way. Also, she started talking her private stuff to me to, and I had the feeling that she trusted me, but then (2 months ago), I found out that she haves another male friend, which I will call Francis. He isn't really her real friend, because she met him on the internet, and she never met him in person, and she tells him her private stuff, just like I tell her my private stuff. That made me jelous for some reason, and I wasn't even in love with her again, but I am a very jelous guy, which I know isn't right. I met this guy, "Francis", talked to him (well not in person), and he seems like an OK guy, who just sees "Sally" as a friend, but still it bothers me. The other thing is, that she knows him for 2-3 years very well, and she knows me about 6 months. Also, recently, she told me that hers best friend is annoying her (which I will call "Lilly"), and told me that she isn't hers best friend anymore. Then, we were talking and she told me that her best friend is "Francis" now (which as I said, she never met), and again, I felt jelousy.

 

 

So, 2 weeks ago, I started feeling something about her. I never felt like this before, and I wasn't in love with someone for quite a while. Actually, when I think about it, my last crush was her, 4 years ago. It happened when I met that "Francis" guy, and another guy who she also met over the internet, (which I will call Donald), who she also knows from the same place as she knows "Francis" from (some forum....), who she also met 2-3 years ago. First, "Donald" and "Sally" were in a fight. Me, "Sally" and "Francis" were in a group conversation, and we started to talk about that. Then we called "Donald" in the conversation (which I never met before) "Sally" told me about this "Donald" dude before, and she told me that he was her good friend too or so. When Donald came in the conversation, first thing he asked me was (I'll call my self "Mike"), "Mike are you in love with Sally?". I was like WTF no. I wondered why he asked me that (I still wasn't in love with "Sally" then, but I think that I started to feel something, at least little about her 1-2 days before that). Then they were fighting and fighting, and I was "defending" "Sally" (if you can call it that way), and then he said "Mike I know you are in love with Sally, but she is a big girl and she can care for herself". I got pissed, but I didn't said nothing. Then later they went out of the chat room, and 5 minutes later, what do you know, they are friends again. I again, felt jelousy. All 4 of us were in a group conversation, and "Donald" and "Sally" were joking how they will get married, how they love each other etc. I know they were just joking, but agian, I felt the annoying thing, called jelousy. Another thing that botheres me is that "Donald" is 18, and "Francis" 17, so they are 3-4 years older then me, and I know (well I don't know but I think) that girls like older guys, and not same aged. Also, my physical appearance is not good at all. "Sally" always tells me that she thinks she is ugly, but she isn't if you ask me. She is much more prettier then me. Really much..

 

Also, I think she changes her mood really fast, so sometimes I really don't know what is she thinking about me. Sometimes, we have these really long conversations, which are mostly jokes, but in the last few weeks we had some serious conversations. Few times she got depressed, and said that she hates everyone, except me and her cat... I try to calm her down, and that is when I feel closest with her... Mostly, the day after that, she isn't depressed anymore, but then, she usually speaks rarely with me, and just is like "heh", "yeah..." etc., and rarely says to me goodbye when she is going.

Most of that time, I feel depressed...

 

The main thing that bothers me, is that probably, if I do nothing, after 3 months I will never see her again, because we are finishing 8th grade this year, and going to High School, different high school. I will only talk to her on MSN, because we almost never go out together.

 

Anyway, there is much more i could tell you about this, but I just told you the main facts (not even all main facts).

 

My questions are: What do you think I should do, how to get rid of the annoying jelousy, and any other tips...

 

I just wanted to share this with someone, so I can get it off my chest.

[Invideo]

Sorry for the bump, but I really need an answer.

[Chat]

If you like her, tell her. Life is too short to be wasting time on what "if". If you dont, then let it go and be her friend. You cant have it both ways.

[Invideo]

Well, at the moment, I feel so ****ing good, that I can't be ****ed to explain what happened

 

OOOOOOO

 

And I think that I don't need your help anymore loveshack

Thanks anyway :DDD

[thrillaveza]

idk, she seems like she's always wants the center of attention but, don't get me wrong, a lot of people are like that. but if she keeps doing things like talkie-talkie to those other two guys, and that it makes you jealous, you should move on and find someone. but yet i agree, if you like her and willing to rid of jealousy you should tell her how you feel or else.

 

like in baseball, you never know if you'll hit it, if you don't take a swing, and if you do swing and miss, at least you know you tried.