honour and trust Posted March 24, 2009 Share Posted March 24, 2009 I have a really quick and short question to ask. I've been dating this guy for a little while now. He has many female friends and I hate it! Everytime I confront him about these girls, intentions, and their existence, he tells me I'm overreacting and they are nothing to worry about. He always ends with, you know i think of you as my future, just relax. What am I supposed to do about this?! I really would like things to work out between us but I don't understand the need to have female friends. My insecurities are getting the best of me and this relationship. Please offer some words...am I overreacting? Should this be acceptable? Link to post Share on other sites
thelostsoul89 Posted March 24, 2009 Share Posted March 24, 2009 It's kinda hard to answer your question! Where did he meet these women? at a club, long time friends? Does he flirt alot?? I mean just because a man is freinds with a woman doesnt mean they are together. So when you comfront him about them does he get annoyyed that your asking or is he calm? I would tell him he needs to be honest with you and introduce these "friends" to you. When you meet them you can be the judge! Link to post Share on other sites
EllieBean Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 You are obviously terribly jealous and perhaps a tad insecure. He has every right to have female friends, just as you have every right to have male friends. If you continue being jealous and overreacting he will get fed up and may end the relationship. A relationship without trust is nothing - has your bf ever given you any reason not to trust him? If not, why don't you trust him? Link to post Share on other sites
tfredro Posted March 25, 2009 Share Posted March 25, 2009 Are you ever around him when he is around these girls? Part of being in a relationship is being inclusive. When I've had a significant other I have always tried to include her in meeting friends of mine that are girls. If he truly does think about you as his future, he should be willing to include you in his friendships with other girls. Be careful about asking him to end those friendships or expecting him to not have friends that are girls... Link to post Share on other sites
Author honour and trust Posted March 25, 2009 Author Share Posted March 25, 2009 I am not so much jealous as I am very insecure. I'm afraid that he will cheat and/or is cheating and it would be right in front of my face. Almost as if I'm allowing it to happen. I don't have a problem with all of his female friends, just a few here and there. I really know most of them but at this particular moment there is one girl who has started popping up on his MySpace and Facebook. I know she likes him so I'm a little concerned and uncomfortable. I even found out that they spent some time together a few weeks back, just hanging out. I'm trying to be careful with my words but I find these random friends and especially the hanging out unacceptable. I want to go about the situation correctly and not be so dramatic and aggressive. Link to post Share on other sites
voldigicam Posted March 26, 2009 Share Posted March 26, 2009 Oh course, he could be telling each girl the same thing. Guys can be sneaky. Link to post Share on other sites
Jackson24 Posted March 26, 2009 Share Posted March 26, 2009 Honestly, it depends on the person. Sometimes you can just tell. When I broke up with my ex she started dating her "guy friend" that I had suspected her of having feelings for. When she broke up with him, she went out with a guy he had suspected her of liking. And so the cycle continues for about 4 times. However I've had a gf who had a bunch of guy friends but i could tell she had no feelings for them and it was strictly friendship, and so it was no big deal for me. Sure sometimes I would get a little jealous but I knew it wasn't it big deal. Usually you can tell by the person, and you'll know. If your not sure, until he gives you a reason to not trust him, you should. Trust is a huge part of a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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