Infidelity and Violence

[Owl]

Reggie, it's easy to conceive...you've watched it on this very thread.

 

Lizzie is a "professional" OW. She accepts "gifts" from several different MM for her....services.

 

And she's clearly indicated that she feels NO compunction about this. She believes that an OW/OM is completely and totally blameless in an affair.

 

Which, frankly, isn't at all surprising. This is a common mental defense mechanism for men and women who engage in that...'profession'.

 

It's how they avoid the guilt and self-recrimination that they would otherwise feel upon thinking about their actions.

[Reggie]

Reggie, it's easy to conceive...you've watched it on this very thread.

 

Lizzie is a "professional" OW. She accepts "gifts" from several different MM for her....services.

 

And she's clearly indicated that she feels NO compunction about this. She believes that an OW/OM is completely and totally blameless in an affair.

 

Which, frankly, isn't at all surprising. This is a common mental defense mechanism for men and women who engage in that...'profession'.

 

It's how they avoid the guilt and self-recrimination that they would otherwise feel upon thinking about their actions.

 

" A mind is a terrible thing to waste" eh?

[Owl]

For some, it's simply "A mind is a terrible thing...". :) :)

[RecordProducer]

Wow, Owl, I never thought of you as a (potentially) violent person. I am surprised and it's not a good surprise. I mean, hitting your "opponent" out of jealousy is one thing, but making him disappear is the worst crime - it's murder. And your hurt feelings don't justify a murder of your wife's lover.

 

I wouldn't have walked up to him and asked him to fight, or something equally silly.

 

He'd have never seen anything coming. He'd have stood not a whit of a chance.

And you think this is manly? It's nothing but cowardice!!!

[Athena]

 

So would it have been cowardice or prudence on my part to handle this in the exact same fashion as I'd been doing for a living for 15 years of my life prior to this situation?

 

you were a professional Hitman?

[carhill]

Military. Marine I believe. Like Gunny and LakesideDream.....

 

Trained killers. Be glad they're on our side

[Reggie]

Wow, Owl, I never thought of you as a (potentially) violent person. I am surprised and it's not a good surprise. I mean, hitting your "opponent" out of jealousy is one thing, but making him disappear is the worst crime - it's murder. And your hurt feelings don't justify a murder of your wife's lover.

 

And you think this is manly? It's nothing but cowardice!!! [/quot

 

Well, for God's sake, it's not like he did it. More power to him having the ability and yet restraining himself. Are we dealing with the thought police, now.

[RecordProducer]

Well, for God's sake, it's not like he did it. More power to him having the ability and yet restraining himself. Are we dealing with the thought police, now.

Do you feel called, Reggie?

 

He is not thinking about it. He is TALKING about it. Big difference. And this was not a mere fantasy at the moment of anger. He is telling us about it as if to impress us. It sounds like he didn't do it because it's illegal, not because he sees anything wrong with killing people. He wants an applause for being a good guy and sparing the guy's life. Or at least he's applauding at himself.

 

Well, Owl, I am disappointed. Hope I don't disapear soon.

[marlena]

Wow, this is some scary stuff I am reading on here. This is the thing with affairs. You NEVER know who you are dealing with on the other end.

 

That's one good reason to NEVER, EVER do it again, if you ask me. Who needs to live in perpetual fear of incurring the rage of a person gone totally ballistic?

[LakesideDream]

I just laughed because the situation basically resolved itself when the guy she cheated on me, turned around and cheated on her. Why hurt myself in the process by killing homie when my life could be better without her.

 

I'm kinda glad she left, because karma hit her quick!!!

 

 

You are a lucky man Chrome. When I found out about the infidelity violence was the last thing on my mind. My wife didn't believe it. Neither did my children. Both believed that because I had been a man of violence that I would "take steps".

 

My wifes very long term BF knew me much better than I knew him. I had met him once or twice decades before when he was a young punk and I was a Marine returned from the war. He was terrified.

 

Still is afraid I suppose. My son told me that they had an argument a few months ago. My son said he asked "him" ..... "how's it feel"? The guy gave him a look and said "how's what feel"?... my sons reply .... to have to look over your shoulder the rest of your life.... My son says that ended the argument and that the poor guy got that Oh S**t look on his face.

 

Actually I prayed that first year or two that they were both fine. No drunken car accidents, no "work related" injuries, no fall asleep at the wheel stuff ... no lost on a fishing trip stuff, because I know the authorities would have come looking for me to "ask questions".

 

All this when all I wanted was freedom from the pain I felt. Freedom that only time and distance brings. Causing someone else pain wasn't on my mind.

 

See Chrome, I understand your avatar and closing better than you know.

[pelicanpreacher]

You know , I really dont want to go there again but....

 

When I told my H that I was going to contact OW (s) H /SO one of the first things he said was "Now, I'm going to have to worry about some guy coming after me?"

 

I'm pretty sure thats when I attacked him.

 

:lmao::lmao: I can't believe he said something that stupid within striking range!!! (Some people don't know when to shut up!) :lmao::lmao::lmao:

 

Wow, this is some scary stuff I am reading on here. This is the thing with affairs. You NEVER know who you are dealing with on the other end.

 

That's one good reason to NEVER, EVER do it again, if you ask me. Who needs to live in perpetual fear of incurring the rage of a person gone totally ballistic?

 

With all the random violence we see on the news every day I'm stunned that so many people can be so cavalier about wantonly conspiring to play with an innocent spouse's emotions by participating in infidelity with a WS. I still remember seeing that newscast of the jilted Brazilian dentist, Clara Harris, who snapped and ran her husband, David Harris, over 3 times with her Mercedes while the man's daughter screamed hysterically in the car seat next to her during this "ride of a mad horse" in the hotel parking lot and I'm thinking...was it worth it?!!

 

Now she's doing 20 years in a Texas prison for murder, manslaughter, and criminally negligent homicide while he, an Orthodontist himself, died with no teeth (oh the irony) just because he showed no honor and couldn't keep his big shiny face where it belonged. I wonder if his OW, who witnessed that shocking event, now thinks twice, if not thrice, about ever engaging in an affair again! Whaddaya think Liz?!

 

Note: I would have only convicted Clara of manslaughter and only agreed to a sentence of 2 years for I just can't muster either sympathy or empathy for him AT ALL!

[RecordProducer]

Note: I would have only convicted Clara of manslaughter and only agreed to a sentence of 2 years for I just can't muster either sympathy or empathy for him AT ALL!

Only two years for murdering an unfaithful husband... :eek: :confused:

 

I guess you also think that the child deserved to be fatherless because her mother couldn't stand the fact that she was rejected. He cheated on her, he didn't kill anybody!!!!!!! This is the same mindset of lunatics who kill their partners when they dump them, and then kill themselves.

 

So disgusting! Stone-age, barbaric instinct! :sick: :sick:

[Chrome Barracuda]

Only two years for murdering an unfaithful husband... :eek: :confused:

 

I guess you also think that the child deserved to be fatherless because her mother couldn't stand the fact that she was rejected. He cheated on her, he didn't kill anybody!!!!!!! This is the same mindset of lunatics who kill their partners when they dump them, and then kill themselves.

 

So disgusting! Stone-age, barbaric instinct! :sick: :sick:

 

It was the rage...

 

That'll be two years of hr life she'll never get back and I think she's in there for more than two years. Oprah was interviewing her a long time ago. It'll be an uphill battle for her to ever see her family again.

 

She could have just rolled up and smacked the taste from his mouth and dumped him on the spot, but You have never had that blinding rage where you just flip and something just screams out to kill them. It's an animalistic thought process. and humans' are capable of it, very easily but we as humans must resist that urge to kill because we're no better than narricistic sociopathic serial killers and murderers if we dont.

 

It's a sad story all around. Even though he was cheating he didnt deserve...death. And she killed him while their grown daughter was in the car, imagine what she was going through.

[Woggle]

No cheater or their affair partner is ever worth giving up your freedom just for some quick revenge. The best revenge is living a great life afterwards and moving on without them. You should have seen the OM tremble in fear though when I caught him in bed with my ex. I thought he was literally going to crap in his pants but I just told him to get the hell out of my house.

[Chrome Barracuda]

No cheater or their affair partner is ever worth giving up your freedom just for some quick revenge. The best revenge is living a great life afterwards and moving on without them. You should have seen the OM tremble in fear though when I caught him in bed with my ex. I thought he was literally going to crap in his pants but I just told him to get the hell out of my house.

 

agreed!!!!

 

Life is too short to be trying to kill some faceless, brainless OM who pokes your chick. I mean if push comes to shove and he got antsy with me. I'd break his legs without any bat might I add. And it was all in self defense.

 

Women are so gullible these days to believe that these OM are knights in shining armor! lol. When they look back most of the time my exes always wanted to come back because I treated them good. but I dont go backwards only forward.

[Trimmer]

Wow, Owl, I never thought of you as a (potentially) violent person. I am surprised and it's not a good surprise. I mean, hitting your "opponent" out of jealousy is one thing, but making him disappear is the worst crime - it's murder. And your hurt feelings don't justify a murder of your wife's lover.

Go back and read closely, and interpret his post in context: "Here's what my wife feared." He never said it was justified and he never said that he considered doing it.

 

He is not thinking about it. He is TALKING about it. Big difference. And this was not a mere fantasy at the moment of anger.

Again, read carefully. He has not said that. He has said it was his wife's fear at his moment of anger.

 

Everything else he has said was bravado, as you mention: "IF I did it, here's how it would go down..." but that's explanation of his wife's fear. And if he wants to swing his brass balls around a bit in the process, I've go no problem with that.

 

It sounds like he didn't do it because it's illegal, not because he sees anything wrong with killing people. He wants an applause for being a good guy and sparing the guy's life. Or at least he's applauding at himself.

You're drawing conclusions that aren't supported by his post. From what he posted, you could just as easily draw the conclusion that he never even considered it - again, he was explaining what his wife feared, at a moment when she had betrayed him. I'm not going to convict him for the combination of these two things: (1) what his thougts might have been, (2) as represented only by what his wife's fears were.

 

Well, Owl, I am disappointed. Hope I don't disapear soon.

Oh please...

[Woggle]

agreed!!!!

 

Life is too short to be trying to kill some faceless, brainless OM who pokes your chick. I mean if push comes to shove and he got antsy with me. I'd break his legs without any bat might I add. And it was all in self defense.

 

Women are so gullible these days to believe that these OM are knights in shining armor! lol. When they look back most of the time my exes always wanted to come back because I treated them good. but I dont go backwards only forward.

 

Most of these OM are nothing at all too. The guy I caught her with stunk worse than anything I have smelled. I have met toothless crackheads who smelled better than he did but she thought he was the greatest thing. She knows now I was certainly the better choice but it's too late for her. If I had done something stupid and was violent I would not be enjoying what I have in life right now.

[hopesndreams]

The best revenge is living a great life afterwards and moving on without them.

 

THE best answer on this thread.

[Chrome Barracuda]

Most of these OM are nothing at all too. The guy I caught her with stunk worse than anything I have smelled. I have met toothless crackheads who smelled better than he did but she thought he was the greatest thing. She knows now I was certainly the better choice but it's too late for her. If I had done something stupid and was violent I would not be enjoying what I have in life right now.

 

She clearly affaird down! lol.

 

but there's a theory on that saying that when a person cheays they pick a partner that reflects their inner self. Or something like that. I forgot. but i wouldnt be surprised if that was true, because women cheat with sumbags and a-holes knowing upfront the OM is no good and do it anyways.

[imagine]

I like the idea that the Old Testament Bible prescribed a death by stoning to adulterers. This method stopped the rest of Israel following suit.

 

Now some here have suggested that this is a form of "murder". I fear that very few here realize that murder is the desecration of the image of God. God then judges those adulterers on his terms.

 

For those that are against capital punishment of any sort, you are the dealers that corrupt society just like the drug dealer that destroys a human brain for profit.

 

If you are not religious - that murder is equated by the BS as worthy of consequences. Everything becomes a perceived ethic.

 

If you are not religious, how do YOU judge?

[Owl]

I'll freely admit...I absolutely considered doing it. It remained a fantasy of mine for the first few months after d-day.

 

Point blank, straight up truth for you there.

 

But...I also knew it for what it was...I had no true INTENTION of going and doing anything along those lines. I had kids to worry about, and there was no way I was going to hurt them by taking off after OM.

 

It simply wasn't worth it.

 

Am I a violent person by nature? No. Am I capable of it? Absolutely.

 

At the end of the day, I chose not to do anything to OM. As a matter of fact...I forgave him. Just as I forgave my wife. I stopped, thought about things, and put myself in his position. I can see what went on from his viewpoint...it doesn't make what happened right, but it makes it understandable.

 

Now...if he were to suddenly show up NOW, and attempt to do the same things all over again...all bets are off. The difference this time is that I absolutely believe that my wife wouldn't give him the chance to get close to her again.

[Maladjusted]

I never did anything to him. I know I would have crushed him with little effort. Part of me wishes that I did, part of me is glad that I didn't because I have a son. I won't ever forgive him because he has a wife and kids too and he did it to them. I hope one day he rots in hell if there is such a place.

 

He showed up at my house while I was out of town. A man's home is his castle, and he invaded mine. That's reason enough for me.

 

I won't actively seek him out, but I swear if he ever contacts my wife again or if ever see him ill knock his teeth so far down his throat he'll have to sit on his food to eat it.

[pelicanpreacher]

Only two years for murdering an unfaithful husband... :eek: :confused:

 

I guess you also think that the child deserved to be fatherless because her mother couldn't stand the fact that she was rejected. He cheated on her, he didn't kill anybody!!!!!!! This is the same mindset of lunatics who kill their partners when they dump them, and then kill themselves.

 

So disgusting! Stone-age, barbaric instinct! :sick: :sick:

 

If you kept up with their story you'd know that he gaslighted her so badly that she was planning to undergo radical cosmetic surgery just to appease his juvenile fantasies. The fact that he never had any intention whatsoever of reconciling with his wife and repairing the damage he inflicted on their marriage while twisting a Bowie knife through the entrails of her self-esteem makes him an utterly despicable person in my eyes. If you are willing to deceptively play with someone's mind and emotions to that extent then, should you lose your life in a fit of passion by the hand of your tormented spouse, I'd vote manslaughter everyday of the week and twice on Sunday ... 2 YEARS MAX! It's not just his cheating I despise but his blatantly hostile manipulation of her psyche that ensures my empathy remains reserved for her and my disgust with him forevermore.

 

On a brighter note, in 20 years (GOD willing) she'll walk out of prison with a chance to start a new life while his dumbazz will still remain molding in a cold hole in the ground! Although we don't always get what we deserve we sometimes get exactly what we pray for and so, with everyone and everything in its proper place, the day may turn bright with the promise of the morn and all will be right with the world!!!

[STILL WONDERING]

I put a .45 to the mrs. Head , it was unloaded, but it was in the heat of a bad arguement, i am madder at her than him.

I havent seen him and am scared of what i might do to him if i did. Time heals but u will never forget

[65tr6]

I never did anything to him. I know I would have crushed him with little effort. Part of me wishes that I did, part of me is glad that I didn't because I have a son. I won't ever forgive him because he has a wife and kids too and he did it to them. I hope one day he rots in hell if there is such a place.

 

He showed up at my house while I was out of town. A man's home is his castle, and he invaded mine. That's reason enough for me.

 

I won't actively seek him out, but I swear if he ever contacts my wife again or if ever see him ill knock his teeth so far down his throat he'll have to sit on his food to eat it.

 

You pretty much said it for me. ditto. We have a 5 yr old. All kind of triggers are now setup off in me. (this is going to take several more months my blood boils everytime there is even a mention). Except the OM was divorced. Had plenty of kids.

 

I hope karma catches up with that pos looser.