Everything I do is always a race!!! How to become more mature

[vince1128]

I feel like everything I do is a race. Right now im typing this very fast so I can be done typing it but if it takes 30 seconds longer its not gonna make a difference. I drive REALLY fast I always speed (never gotten a ticket, im smart about it atleast). I eat really fast, always shoveling it down trying to finsih fast for some reason. I have no idea why.

 

I've noticed this pattern in myself, and I'd like to change it. I'm a fast paced extremely outgoing person and I always like to have the attention. Im 18 and a senior in hs going to college in fall. In school or around ppl I always take jokes further then necessary or just things to get ppl laughing or I guess paying attention to me. I have lots of friends and lots of girls but I have noticed that I always seem to try hard around ppl (I guess to make myself cooler or something?) I think that might stem from moving around a good amount as a kid always having to make new friends and start building myself up the social ladder again.

 

My mom tells me I always have wanted to be older then I am, which is true. In school I get good grades but i skate by without doing homework until right before class and I dont study for tests. Im spoiled, I have a really nice car which I do pay for but I have an iPhone, nice clothes, and generally a lot of nice stuff which I take for granted and always want NICER or BETTER.

 

Thinking about all this makes me think I'm immature and lazy. Im very intollerant about waiting. I get annoyed easily. I manipulate people sometimes to get what I want. Im self centered most of the time always looking out for myself, although I do care about people. I want to mature and get past all this before I form bad habits which could stay with me for the rest of my life.

 

I dont even know where to start. Thats why Ive just listed to some character flaws Ive found in myself. If anyone has any insight Id really appreciate it.