Tiger Posted May 9, 2000 Share Posted May 9, 2000 OK-- Here goes I have been chatting with this guy from our chatroom on the net and we have hit it off really well on the net so we made plans to meet off the net. We had a great time that eveing and the attracion was like WOW between us -- yeah we did the mattress thingy. I am confused because he says he still does not know what he wants and as badly as both of our past relationships have been we have decided to take it slow but my heart is already there. He says he still wants to go out a few more times to make sure this is what he wants...How much time should I give him before I get all high and mighty and leave the scene? What does it really mean when a guy says he does not know what he wants? Means he is still trying to find his feelings or ????? ARGGHHHHHHHHHH Men are hard to UNDERSTAND!!!!!! hee hee thanks for your input! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted May 9, 2000 Share Posted May 9, 2000 What it means when a man says he does not know what he wants is that he has not yet found what he wants. It means that he is learning to take things slow, to be rational, sensible, not to rush into things, to use his head, to weigh the pros and cons, to pay attention to another's behavior and to give due time for feelings to develop and to give proper and due consideration to the decision at hand. In other words, in your case it means you've got a pretty sharp guy here who doesn't want to rush into anything. Just because two people do the "mattress thingy" doesn't mean they are committed for eternity...or even going together. It means, hopefully, they had a great roll in the hay. You haven't been around this guy physcially nearly long enough. You are definitely infatuated but you should also give this time to develope normally. Everybody has his own time frame. Most of the guys who take a very short time to decide to see a girl usually end up using her for sex and dumping her when something better comes along. BECAUSE both of your past relationships have been BAD, that is the VERY BEST REASON I can think to give this time. Neither of you need another BAD relationship. Some of the WORST relationships start out wonderfully. So he wants to go out a few more times to see if this is what he wants. This sounds like taking a test drive in a car. How do people know just when feelings are going to develop??? I hope in time you get this all figured out but love is not a mechanical thing with timetables already set in some sort of manual. We are dealing with feelings here. My Gawd!!! If you are just looking to have sex with this guy, I am sure he will accomodate you. But if you are looking for some quality experiences with him or any other guy, give them some reasonable time...certainly longer than a few dates...to make up their minds. I only wish I had met up with more girls like you in my younger days. Oh, what I could have done with them...and to them!!! (Shut my mouth) Link to post Share on other sites
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