How do I stop having these nightmares again

[whatwentwrong19]

Ok so I reported my long time ex girlfriend when she appeared at my door like I predicted plus calling me at my new job. I told them everything that took place 2 years ago during our 3 year relationship which I can't never have back.

 

She is out of picture, I hope so as her presence disgust me. Now it's me recently having trouble sleeping, it's all happening again. I still relive those moment, it keeps on playing in my head over and over again and sometimes doesn't stop. Just yesterday I was dreaming about her again. In the dream she was at my house with a sarcastic grin on her face saying '' I followed you and now we can be together, don't run from me again'' so that's when I woke up and start checking everywhere my house if she was there.

 

I know those are just dreams but it's like this never ends does it? I want my life back before I met her. I was a normal 19 year-old now it's like I age too fast and all because of this ****ing psycho, grrrr so mad now. I feel like I'm gonna go crazy and might one day be found in a mental hospital. I haven't shown up at work nor at my class, fact I been drinking all day. I'm a total mess. Or maybe I'm already crazy and don't even know it.

 

No this shouldn't be happening, I'm a man. If so then why did I let it happen for 3 years before finally leaving her?

[NWSTRT2121]

I think there are a couple things that could really benefit you and take it from someone who ended a relationship with very rocky terms and that constantly consumed my mind afterword for over a year.

 

1. Don't drink...it will never solve your problems. In fact most of the time it just makes them worse and leads to more problems.

 

2. It sounds like you are really internalizing this problem sitting at home missing out on your life letting it eat you alive. You need to get out there and make an effort. It may seem at first that it's not working and a waste of your time when you're thoughts are elsewhere, but trust me if you try and be productive you'll start to feel better about yourself at the end of the day.

 

3. Get your feelings and emotions out by talking to someone about it. In your case I would probably recommend seeing a therapist if your health insurance you're on covers it. If not, speak to your school counselor one on one about the situation. I don't think you belong in a mental institution, but rather a healthy environment where you will have the means to let your emotions out(trust me, more than once the idea of checking into a mental institution sounded like a good idea when I was obsessing after a while still over my ex, but you'll later realize how silly it was when this passes).

 

4. Before you go to bed every night, envision yourself forgiving her, letting go and moving on with your life. People do horrible things to each other, the goal is to try and learn from our mistakes and move on.

 

5. Another thing I personally did was go to the library or bookstore and find a few good self help books in dealing with getting over relationships, anxiety and depression which I suffered from after I ended things with my ex. Don't just read the books, but write your thoughts down and then use the books as a guide to write out healthier responses to your initial thoughts. The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns is one I recommend since it has a number of exercises in the book for you to do while reading it.

 

Good luck with getting through this, I have confidence you will make it out alive haha.