how can i get her back?

[Guest]

here's the situation:

 

 

 

i was dating this girl for almost a year. before we were together she was engaged, but that ended when he joined the military. she had been without him for almost four months and had dated other people when we met.

 

 

 

we were together all the time and everything was perfect. we were almost ready to move in together, when all of a sudden we began to fight a lot. knowing that we both loved each other we agreed to give each other some space and put the moving in on hold.

 

 

 

while we were apart her ex-fiance came back to town, and now she wants to see him. i am crushed. i have tried to ger over her by going on dates and even by not going on dates. i am at wits end. i miss her so much.

 

 

 

she tried to explain to me that she is confused and doesn't know who she wants to be with, and that we should try to get to know each other again and see what happens.

 

 

 

what should i do? i think i am still in love.

 

 

 

paul

[Tony T]

You never want to be with anybody who is not absolutely certain and passionate about wanting to be with you. This is NOT the girl.

 

Your biggest clue here was when she broke off her engagement when her guy went off into the military. This is a real lady of commmitment, right?

 

She is not confused now. She told you right out she wants to see her ex-fiance.

 

You are a lucky man to be rid of this chick. Sure, you had feelings for her but that doesn't stand for a lot if they aren't returned. And in this case, the girl is flakey as hell to boot.

 

I am truly sorry this lady hurt you. I am completely at a loss for why you would want to get back with a lady who has her head so unsecurely fastened to the rest of her torso. She is space queen of North America.

 

Love is simply not enough to sustain a relationship and she doesn't have what it takes. Stop trying so hard to forget her...go through the pain...feel what you need to...and then move forward with your life. PAY ATTENTION. Don't date somebody who broke up with her fiance because he went off to military service...or a chick who is in some other lame situation.

 

There are just so many wonderful women with great heads on their shoulders...of all ages...why go for the insane.

 

You sound like you have the capacity for deep feelings. Bestowe them onto someone who is worthy next time and, by the way, TAKE YOUR TIME and pay attention to details.

[Princess]

Dear Paul,

 

I understand that you're still in love with this girl and since you've gone out with her for a long time, its not surprising that you're hurt. But I don't think that you should try to be involved with her. It seems like she was running around trying to forget about her old fiancee while he was in the military waiting for him to come back to her. And when he came back, she of course took him back. That's probably not what you wanted to hear, but that's what it sounds like. Of course, she did have deep feelings for you and I'm sure she'll never forget you. You probably helped her alot in that year. It'll take time, but you just need to get over her. You're doing the right thing by going out and not going out. Stick with friends and you'll find that person that knows what she wants: you.

 

Good Luck,

 

Princess