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The most complicated situation - an ex and his "best" friend


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Hi, wasn't sure where to post this so apologies if I got it wrong :S

 

My situation is quite a complicated one. It starts about 2 years back; a friend of mine (call him guy A) who I'd known for about 2 years told me he liked me at a party one night. This came as a bit of a shock as this guy was notorious for just getting with girls and it was a known fact he didn't really do relationships - not because he was a big player, he just hadn't found a girl he wanted to start a meaningful relationship with. We kissed (nothing else), however I kind of wrote it off and thought that I was just another girl he wanted to get with. I'd always found him attractive and we'd flirt like crazy, and every other weekend we'd go out with a bunch of friends, get drunk and kiss, but nothing else was really said on the subject - he never made a real move to ask me out on a date or anything, so I never believed friends when they would say he was really falling for me because in my eyes there was no follow through - things would only happen when we were drunk. This went on up until about Jan of last year.

 

Then I met another guy (guy B) who went to the same school as we did but was in the year below us. We got very close and ended up starting a relationship, and I fell head over heels in love with this guy. I forgot about my flirty thing with guy A and was happy with B. I introduced B to all my friends (including A) and everyone seemed to get along well, we'd all go out together - it was great. Then, one night, guy A finally decides to tell me he's in love with me. I tell him I can't do anything about it because I'm with B, but he continues to persist and then I did something I'm not proud of - I kissed him.

 

I ended up telling B that I had kissed A and he went mental (as expected). We broke up and I was completely devastated, but me and guy A still kept in contact, I didn't hate him for it because it was my mistake. As this was during the summer I had planned to go away on holiday with family, but to my utter surprise, when I came home and called guy A for a catch up he told me that him and B had become very close friends. WHAT?! I was incredibly confused and thought that this was just B's very weird way of dealing with the situation (friends close enemies closer). However as the months wore on, not only did A and B become best friends, B played me around and treated me like dirt to make me "pay" for what I had done - he slept with 2 of my friends and told me I deserved it, called me every name under the sun, started rumours etc.. but because I was so in love with him, I accepted how he treated me up until October where I felt I had had enough. I told B that unless he was serious of getting back together with me then there was no future for us as "friends with benefits" - or even just friends for that matter. We had a huge fight and ended on terrible terms.

 

Me and B are on talking terms at present and have moved on; he has a new girlfriend and I no longer have feelings for him, I've realised how awful we are as a couple and how horrible he is as a person. Me and A are still close friends like before however now that I am no longer fussing or obsessing over guy B, my eyes have bee opened to what a great guy A is, and how much I like him. I found out the other day guy A still has feelings for me, even more so than before all of this happened. I would quite like to resume my relationship with A from before I ever met B and take it to the next level, but because A and B are such close friends would this be wrong? Even though I had a thing with this guy from before I ever met B? Even though he treated me like crap I still have respect for B and would hate to come between him and his "best" friend. But, to this day I still don't believe their friendship has any foundation whatsoever. B never had it out with A for kissing his girlfriend, they just...became friends. Is that normal? I would be able to understand if they had been friends BEFORE, but who becomes best friends with the guy who ruined your relationship?

 

I know there is a strict rule to never go for your ex-boyfriend's best friend, but this, I feel, has a different twist to it and I'm stuck with what to do so I would appreciate any help :) Thanks (and sorry for it being such a long post haha)

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