Anyone dating after being Divorced?

[SummerLady]

Online dating.. you will have a lot of fun. I did Match.com and a free one (Plentyoffish.com), both worked fairly well. Just throw a profile up.

 

 

I was waiting for someone to comment on this, I assume its more mainstream then when I was young. It seems neat and clinical at the same time. I assume everyone does it???????

[Intricategirl]

I was waiting for someone to comment on this, I assume its more mainstream then when I was young. It seems neat and clinical at the same time. I assume everyone does it???????

 

I met the guy that I'm going to have coffee with online. To be honest, I was feeling a little lonely one night and decided to browse Craigslist personal ads so I could see someone more desperate than I was. This guy had a survey and I thought it was hilarious, so I responded before I even realized what I was doing. We talked a couple of times online and he seems very cool and we share a lot of interests. But I didn't put up a profile or anything, and didn't even mean to find myself dating again.

 

But yes, it's pretty mainstream. I've got several friends in LTR that met online. And like CTA mentioned, one of them was through PlentyofFish. Just be smart, meet in public the first several times, and date safely. Should apply whether online or not.

[Billy Bob]

I was waiting for someone to comment on this, I assume its more mainstream then when I was young. It seems neat and clinical at the same time. I assume everyone does it???????

 

Everyone does it.. You want someone with a certain religious background..check, you want someone with a Masters degree, check, you want someone that makes at least $$$, check..plus you get to see pictures to figure out if the initial attraction is even there.

 

You arrange a quick coffee date at Starbucks for the first date, sit down for 20 minutes or even an hour, then say goodbye. If your into the other person, send them an e-mail later that day telling them you had a good coffee date and would like to go out again if they are interested.

 

No hard feelings if they aren't, just move on to the next coffee date.. It will all be about what you are looking for.. for some it is a meat market, for some it is an avenue to meet your next LTR... most people I met were pretty honest about what they were looking for.

[Billy Bob]

I met the guy that I'm going to have coffee with online. To be honest, I was feeling a little lonely one night and decided to browse Craigslist personal ads so I could see someone more desperate than I was.

 

Yeah, Craigslist can be a little creepy though.. especially for the girls. I did however meet my now 2nd wife (current wife) on craigslist (not the causual encounters section!). She posted an ad that she was looking for a nice guy. I wouldn't have answered it but she stated she lived in my neighborhood (and I had decided to only date people who lived nearby).. we started chatting over e-mail and realized we worked for the same company.. the we realized we worked in the same city.. then we realized we worked in the same building.. two floors apart.

 

I see my now wife everyday for lunch!

[Trialbyfire]

Avoid Craigslist like the plague. If you've been following current events, there's a serial killer on the loose, using Craigslist ads to find his victims.

[Billy Bob]

Avoid Craigslist like the plague. If you've been following current events, there's a serial killer on the loose, using Craigslist ads to find his victims.

 

Please! yes, some nut killed one whore in Boston and they caught him. I haven't known that many folks that have been murdered using online dating personals.

[Trialbyfire]

Please! yes, some nut killed one whore in Boston and they caught him. I haven't known that many folks that have been murdered using online dating personals.

Hope this is the guy! He also robbed another at gunpoint, with a similar MO.

 

As for online personals, if you have kids, pedophiles also use this medium, to target their victims. So, if you use online anything, don't mention your children in your profile.

[Billy Bob]

Hope this is the guy! He also robbed another at gunpoint, with a similar MO.

 

As for online personals, if you have kids, pedophiles also use this medium, to target their victims. So, if you use online anything, don't mention your children in your profile.

 

Boy, you're really trying to scare anyone off from online dating!? Much better to meet people in a seedy bar in your opinion? Church? (actually all the ministers and priests try to molest your children at church)..

 

It's pretty common practice for divorced people to put down whether they have kids or whether they want them. No reason to include pics of them in your profile though.

 

Trialbyfire.. where would you suggest people meet dates in this day and age?

[Intricategirl]

I'm not putting a profile, we're meeting in a public place, he's crazy if he thinks he's coming home with me on the first date, and he won't meet my kids until I'm about to move in with him. Safe dating.

[Billy Bob]

I'm not putting a profile, we're meeting in a public place, he's crazy if he thinks he's coming home with me on the first date, and he won't meet my kids until I'm about to move in with him. Safe dating.

 

However.. I did usually google check the prospective dates name and e-mail address. I usually paid a few bucks and did a background check on Intelius.com.

 

I live in Washington State, so could go to Washington State Public Records and look up any criminal/traffic records.

 

I did catch one gal I was just starting to date and found out she had lied about her age and had 3 DUIs.. so dropped her right away.

[Trialbyfire]

Boy, you're really trying to scare anyone off from online dating!? Much better to meet people in a seedy bar in your opinion? Church? (actually all the ministers and priests try to molest your children at church)..

 

It's pretty common practice for divorced people to put down whether they have kids or whether they want them. No reason to include pics of them in your profile though.

 

Trialbyfire.. where would you suggest people meet dates in this day and age?

No, not really. People just need to be careful when sourcing from a pool of strangers, particularly if they have children. If you can't find someone to vouch for them or if you can't find a way to verify information on the person, be extra cautious.

 

How about good ol' fashion social networking? At least this way, you know someone who knows them or knows of them.

[Billy Bob]

No, not really. People just need to be careful when sourcing from a pool of strangers, particularly if they have children. If you can't find someone to vouch for them or if you can't find a way to verify information on the person, be extra cautious.

 

How about good ol' fashion social networking? At least this way, you know someone who knows them or knows of them.

 

I guess I probably felt less worried as a single guy with kids.. I agree from experience to keep the kids out of it completely until it becomes something steady.

 

Good ol' fashion social networking works if you have a social network.. many of us were so tied into married life that we didn't have a lot of single friends, just a few married friends. It also depends on how bad you want to meet someone.. On Match.com I could easily pull off 3 or 4 coffee dates per week... Don't think I could pull that off by social networking.

 

I also really feel that you are shortchanging yourself if you don't go out and meet a lot of people to find someone that you really click with. Lots of people just go force-fit themselves with the first or second person they date..

[Trialbyfire]

I guess I probably felt less worried as a single guy with kids.. I agree from experience to keep the kids out of it completely until it becomes something steady.

 

Good ol' fashion social networking works if you have a social network.. many of us were so tied into married life that we didn't have a lot of single friends, just a few married friends. It also depends on how bad you want to meet someone.. On Match.com I could easily pull off 3 or 4 coffee dates per week... Don't think I could pull that off by social networking.

 

I also really feel that you are shortchanging yourself if you don't go out and meet a lot of people to find someone that you really click with. Lots of people just go force-fit themselves with the first or second person they date..

I guess it depends on whether you're into volume dating or not. I dated/was involved with, 9 guys in two years of which none were met on any online dating site, bar or church scenario. It depends on what you're looking for and what you're comfortable with.

 

As a woman, you have to be waayyyy more cautious than men. This is fact.

[SummerLady]

I guess I probably felt less worried as a single guy with kids.. I agree from experience to keep the kids out of it completely until it becomes something steady.

 

Good ol' fashion social networking works if you have a social network.. many of us were so tied into married life that we didn't have a lot of single friends, just a few married friends. It also depends on how bad you want to meet someone.. On Match.com I could easily pull off 3 or 4 coffee dates per week... Don't think I could pull that off by social networking.

 

I also really feel that you are shortchanging yourself if you don't go out and meet a lot of people to find someone that you really click with. Lots of people just go force-fit themselves with the first or second person they date..

 

 

You are right, my social network consists of married mothers and fathers. My one friend has a married brother who has diviorced friends but that's it. Plentyoffish was neat. Again I am just looking to date for fun right now and this may be the best way to go. I will sign up for classes and other stuff down the road but for now just wanna get out there and have friendly fun.

[Billy Bob]

You are right, my social network consists of married mothers and fathers. My one friend has a married brother who has diviorced friends but that's it. Plentyoffish was neat. Again I am just looking to date for fun right now and this may be the best way to go. I will sign up for classes and other stuff down the road but for now just wanna get out there and have friendly fun.

 

Plentyoffish is a bit of a meat market.. probably a higher percentage of poor people and cheating married guys (like craigslist) since it is free and somewhat anonymous. I think the dating is a little higher quality on a paid service like Match.com.. Some of the sites that try to match your personalities etc (Eharmony and Chemistry).. are BS. Mostly the same people from Match, you just don't get to see the other person's picture until after you have wasted a whole bunch of time answering canned questions... then you find they look like the rear end of a dog.. might work for really ugly people though..

[SummerLady]

I have a coffee date coming up, will know the details by tonight, its for next week. Will keep you updated.

[SummerLady]

Plentyoffish is a bit of a meat market.. probably a higher percentage of poor people and cheating married guys (like craigslist) since it is free and somewhat anonymous. I think the dating is a little higher quality on a paid service like Match.com.. Some of the sites that try to match your personalities etc (Eharmony and Chemistry).. are BS. Mostly the same people from Match, you just don't get to see the other person's picture until after you have wasted a whole bunch of time answering canned questions... then you find they look like the rear end of a dog.. might work for really ugly people though..

 

My good friend met her fiance on plentyoffish. I guess there may be some good ones, just need to be careful.

[Gunny376]

When I'm in 'dating mode' I just use the World's Best 'Pickup' line "Hi!" any and everywhere I go and just strike up a conversation with anyone I find attractive? If they're interested? They're interested ~ iif not? They're not.

 

Seventy out of one-hundred won't be because they're already involved with someone else (married going steady, etc) Another fifteen out of thirty won't be interested for one reason or the other. Out of the other fifteen you might "close" for the digits two or three and a coffee date or more.

 

Not once have I had a single one call me a pervert, scream for the police, run screaming in the oppossite direction. They were all very polite, nice, smiling, etc.

 

That's how us old timers had to do it back in the day before "on-line' dating, e-mails, cell phones.

 

Yea you get blown off a lot, get some bad numbers, crash and burn a lot ~ but I've never taken it personal. As though it was a reflection on my personality or charcther?

 

Come to think of it, that's how I've always meet any and all my grilfriends?

 

"Hi! My name's Gunny376! Remember that! You'll be screaming it latter on tonight!

[Intricategirl]

"Hi! My name's Gunny376! Remember that! You'll be screaming it latter on tonight!

 

Bwaaahaaahaa! Then, let me be the first to call you a pervert, but I mean it as a compliment.

[PWSX3]

Gunny's a guy what more would you expect...:laugh:

 

We are just to the point that's all!!!

[SummerLady]

When I'm in 'dating mode' I just use the World's Best 'Pickup' line "Hi!" any and everywhere I go and just strike up a conversation with anyone I find attractive? If they're interested? They're interested ~ iif not? They're not.

 

Seventy out of one-hundred won't be because they're already involved with someone else (married going steady, etc) Another fifteen out of thirty won't be interested for one reason or the other. Out of the other fifteen you might "close" for the digits two or three and a coffee date or more.

 

Not once have I had a single one call me a pervert, scream for the police, run screaming in the oppossite direction. They were all very polite, nice, smiling, etc.

 

That's how us old timers had to do it back in the day before "on-line' dating, e-mails, cell phones.

 

Yea you get blown off a lot, get some bad numbers, crash and burn a lot ~ but I've never taken it personal. As though it was a reflection on my personality or charcther?

 

Come to think of it, that's how I've always meet any and all my grilfriends?

 

"Hi! My name's Gunny376! Remember that! You'll be screaming it latter on tonight!

 

I agree with you Gunny, I like the old fashion way. But with modern technology and overly busy lives meeting someone by chance is possible but not overly probable I think, at least in my circumstances. I have met men out but no one I was interested in and I hate the bar scene for meeting anyone, just like to go out with friends and have a drink once in a while. Oh the good old days........