justme2781 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 my former best friend has cheated on her fiance with a 20 year old in their home, and slept with another man she met at a club one night. i have known both of them for 10 years (her and her fiance) and if he knew my bf was cheating he would tell me. so one weekend her fiance went to the beach and he was taking new meds for his epilepsy she was ragging on him for not picking up the phone (her grandma had passed) and said she wouldnt get over it meanwhile she was planning on having her lover over at THEIR house that night. so we went to her fiances sister house and we were drinking and i had been stewing about her selfishness all day so i blurted out to his sister that she had cheated. i told her what happened the next day and she doesnt seem to feel guilty she told him some semblance of what she did I THINK. not the whole truth i am sure probably 1/100th of he truth and now we arent friends and thats fine but she has posted notes about how her best friend betrayed her on facebook, like not even saying that she had done anything or feeling guilty or anything plus its my b-day and she hasnt saud happy b-day. i am so pissed at her selfishness. i also want to tell him the whole truth because i feel like thats the right thing to do, i need advice!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 25, 2009 Author Share Posted April 25, 2009 please please please help Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 It sounds like the friendship is probably dead so there will be little risk in you telling the b/friend the whole truth. However, don't expect him to believe you or appreciate that you've told him. These things often backfire badly on the person who thinks they are doing the right thing. In your shoes I would just walk away from the whole mess. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 25, 2009 Author Share Posted April 25, 2009 yeah ur probably right but she just makes me ill Link to post Share on other sites
BUENG1 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 yeah ur probably right but she just makes me ill Do you know how the guy reacted when you/his sister told him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 25, 2009 Author Share Posted April 25, 2009 i didnt and the sis didnt i think she just told him she was just talking to someone. Link to post Share on other sites
samsungxoxo Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 Just stay out of the situation. You already told them that she cheated, what more do you need?? No point to it. Link to post Share on other sites
BUENG1 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 i didnt and the sis didnt i think she just told him she was just talking to someone. So you think he doesn't know. Honestly it sounds like you've had to deal with the fallout about doing what you thought was right, so I would consider telling him explicitly(from you directly). Though I would ask him to try to keep you out of this as much as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 25, 2009 Author Share Posted April 25, 2009 i just think he will be relly hurt if he knows but at the same time he deseres to know Link to post Share on other sites
fooled once Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 the friendship is dead so I would tell him everything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 do you think hed rather not know???? im so confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I'd tell him... what have you got to loose? lol. She's an idiot and you was right to do what you did. You couldnt stand for it and stood up and did the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
lostsunsets Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Tell him. Say that its not about him or even your ex BF. Its about you. You're telling him because you would want the same courtesy from your friend of ten years. What you do with the info is up to you. And if it costs my friendship with both of you, so be it. I just couldn't live with myself if I heard 10 years down the road that you found out she was cheating, and I never told you. Link to post Share on other sites
Dexter Morgan Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 i am so pissed at her selfishness. i also want to tell him the whole truth because i feel like thats the right thing to do, i need advice!!!!!!! Then do it! Tell him everything. If he is a good friend of yours, its like drinking and driving...you wouldn't let him drive home drunk. friends don't let friends marry hos! DO NOT let him marry her without knowing what kind of person she is. don't let him make the biggest mistake of his life. Link to post Share on other sites
Kaii Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 I would tell him. What have you got to lose at this point? I'm sure if she is no longer speaking to you, then chances are he will not be permitted to either. She wouldn't want him to hear what she's been up to. I would tell him though, seriously, you'll be doing him a favour in the long run. Don't let him marry her without knowing the truth. Absolve yourself of guilt and let him know what's really been going on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justme2781 Posted April 30, 2009 Author Share Posted April 30, 2009 so her fiance wrote me and said he blamed me for ruining his life!? how did i ruin his life!!! i guess its easier to blame me, part of me thinks it was her pretending to be him on facebook, he is never on facebook, in fact his account just appeared a few days ago!! lol she is a nut. Link to post Share on other sites
lkjh Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 Why are you half assing this? Do not let the truth just trickle down to him. This will just drive him crazy. Meet with him and tell him everything. If he is still in denial then oh well you did the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
jnj express Posted April 30, 2009 Share Posted April 30, 2009 You need to tell him everything about his fiance, if she is cheating on him, and ragging on him now, and they are not even married, think about what his life would be like once he is legally tied to her by mge. Save him from a lifetime of hurt. I guarantee you, in the long run he will thank you a thousand times over for saving him from someone who doesn't give a sh*t about him. Tell him ASAP. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts