TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I wonder if Moderators would be interested in pinning this thread? This can be a thread (or maybe even a sub-forum) where those requiring support and solace may come to make these requests...it might be nice to have a collective focus on wishing each other well, and only this. What does everyone think? because you see, I have such a request. _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 Dear friends, I would request that, whatever your practise, and however you do it, that you keep my elderly father in your thoughts. He is 88. He has had cancer of the bladder. He broke his back 4 years ago. He has an enlarged prostate. He has osteoporosis. he has great difficulty walking. He was on a special diet to relieve the work of his kidneys, due to this cancer. Now, he is passing blood copiously, with his motions. So they have changed his diet, yet again.... he has lost a great deal of weight, and is very weak. They will be conducting further tests at the beginning of May to try to diagnose and establish the precise cause of this bleeding He is on much medication. I don't know whether this means he will get better, or he will die. I am aware of dying being a possibility. This is what happens to us all. so I do not necessarily request that you pray for his continued life. I ask that you consider his discomfort and distress. And I ask you also to consider my mother who is caring for him, that she have the energy and stamina to be able to cope and be comforted. Life ends. This I know. So maybe this is then beginning of the end for him... who can tell? But I wish him relief and serenity. And I wish my mother fortitude and courage. That's all I ask of you, to join me in this prayer. It does not matter whether you are Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, Islamic, Jewish or of any other calling. or none at all.... But if we all use the methods we use, to bring comfort to one another..... Surely this cannot be a bad thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I wonder if Moderators would be interested in pinning this thread? This can be a thread (or maybe even a sub-forum) where those requiring support and solace may come to make these requests...it might be nice to have a collective focus on wishing each other well, and only this. What does everyone think? because you see, I have such a request. _/l\_ Cool idea. I am very interested in this. I do have a request too.. my hubby has been made redundant.. prayers are very appreciated at this time. Damn Bankers.. What is your request Taramaiden? Take care, Eve xx Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 But I wish him relief and serenity. And I wish my mother fortitude and courage. That's all I ask of you, to join me in this prayer. I am so sorry, Tara. I've been through it. I know what the pain is like. Yes, your wish is mine as well, relief and serenity for your father and fortitude and courage for all of you. Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Will pray. Take care, Eve xx Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 Eve, my request was for my father.... I think you see this now.... I keep hope in my heart that your husband will be fortunate in his job search, or whatever plans he proposes to pursue. I hope he will be buoyant and positive, and that he will be able to see this as an opportunity, rather than a set-back. but I understand redundancy, and the soul destroying effects, so I sincerely pray he copes well.... Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 may God give you and your loved ones the graces needed to deal with your daddy's health concerns, TM, as well as a peaceful passing for Dad ... Eve, I'm truly sorry to hear about your husband's job loss, especially in such an uncertain climate –*Lord, grant this family fortitude and assurance that all will be well, that blessings are sure to follow even as they may come disguised! will keep the both of you and y'alls families in my prayers. hugs, quank Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Thanks guys. He will be fine I am sure.. there are three positive job opportunities on the horizon. Better even than what he will be leaving behind next week. His Manager is probably more upset than my Hubby. He held out for 9 months of sleepless nights before making the redundancies. He is truly a man of integrity. I will certainly be praying for your Daddy Taramaiden. I am truly happy that you have someone so special in your life. Between the travelling and the memories and hopes find time to take something positive from this time. I will be praying for a spiritual anchor of some kind to become manifest for you all at this precious time. If it be that it is time for him to go, I will be praying for a good death for him. Terrible words I know.. but may dignity, love and laughter be with you all. Take care, Eve xx Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Thanks guys. He will be fine I am sure.. there are three positive job opportunities on the horizon. Better even than what he will be leaving behind next week. His Manager is probably more upset than my Hubby. He held out for 9 months of sleepless nights before making the redundancies. He is truly a man of integrity. I will certainly be praying for your Daddy Taramaiden. I am truly happy that you have someone so special in your life. Between the travelling and the memories and hopes find time to take something positive from this time. I will be praying for a spiritual anchor of some kind to become manifest for you all at this precious time. If it be that it is time for him to go, I will be praying for a good death for him. Terrible words I know.. but may dignity, love and laughter be with you all. Take care, Eve xx Eve your always in my prayers. I will pray for your husband and his job seach. Just please be their for him and encourage him because his self esteem maybe low. Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 I would like to request a prayer for my marriage, my wife and I have been seperated for a month now and I have no idea how it will turn out. I've been praying myself and I hope the Lord will bring us back together as 1. Thank you Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 Taramaiden, I'm sending you and your family good wishes and hope that they quickly diagnose and treat your father's illness. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 Thank you Trialbyfire... I truly appreciate that. You are all most kind. Such sentiments warm the heart. It is comforting to know that so many miles away, someone is thinking of your well-being. I will keep updates coming, as and when they appear. _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 prayers also for you CM ... are you doing anything for YOU right now, like counseling, to help you through this experience? Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 CM... I will offer up great wishes for your troubled mind and the fervent hope that you and your husband may come through this productively and happily.... You are in my thoughts. Thank you for posting. Thank you everyone.... _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 TM- I am very sorry to hear about your father. I lost my father to cancer just over a week ago- he was 58, and I am expecting our first child, what would have been his first grandchild. I can understand the pain and sorrow you must be feeling. Some of your fathers symptoms sound similar to mine- ie the passing of blood etc. My dad passed quietly and peacefully in the end and he was in no pain which we are very grateful for. I was with him at the time, and it was very sad but there was relief that his suffering was over, and that we as a family could move out of the limbo phase of "waiting for him to die", and begin to grieve his loss. The process is going to be a long one, but its important to go through the stages, and saying goodbye at a funeral is really important. We also had my dad at home for a few days before the funeral so we could say goodbye to him in familiar surroundings, many cultures don't do this, but we thought it really helped with saying goodbye. Take comfort in the fact that at 88, your father has lived a long and hopefully full life. I hope that if it is his time to go, that its painless and peaceful. Spend as much time as you can with him now- even if its just to hold his hand. Look after yourself- make sure you eat properly and try to get enough sleep. All my best wishes and thoughts to you at this difficult time. I personally don't believe in a god or prayer, but I do believe in the comfort of knowing others are thinking about you in your time of sadness. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 sb129... Your words resound with compassion and kindness, and I am so grateful to you for posting them here. my most sincere condolences for your recent loss of your father. At such a young age, too... I work in London, but my parents are back in Italy, so this poses difficulties for me...But I am on the telephone to my mother every day, and I have told her to let me know of any changes. i would drop everything in an instant to be with them. I find that if I cannot sleep, I meditate... you know, people consider me very callous at times, because over the time I have practised Buddhism, I have developped a matter-of-fact attitude to death. I don't take it lightly. In fact, it is a most serious matter. But it is something to become accustomed to because we must all face it in our lives - and last of all, of course, our own death.... So people think i do not care. that I am indifferent. Please, this is not so. I am as sad as anyone else could be. naturally, i do not want my father to die. But I know that at one point, sooner or later, it will be the next logical step.... I feel deeply for those who remain behind to continue their lives, with this void in their days. So I send you my very best wishes, to you and your family. Bring up your child to know of their grandfather. You see... Life blossoms and continues..... With much metta & karuna.... _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 prayers also for you CM ... are you doing anything for YOU right now, like counseling, to help you through this experience? Yes, I've been in my word, in prayer, and pretty soon I will be going to either my Pastor or one of the Elders of my church. Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 CM... I will offer up great wishes for your troubled mind and the fervent hope that you and your husband may come through this productively and happily.... You are in my thoughts. Thank you for posting. Thank you everyone.... _/l\_ Thank you Tara for your prayers, yes I also pray for my mind as well as my wife's mind....Thank you for your support Link to post Share on other sites
Kasan Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 What does everyone think? I think this is a wonderful idea! A wonderful way to support and comfort those of us in need. We can never have enough kindness or love in our lives. To all of you enduring such difficult trials and tribulations in your lives right now, I am sending you my very best wishes your way. You will get through this, we will all get through this...... (((Hugs))) Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 TM- I lived in London until last year, and my family are in New Zealand. My husband and I moved back home in Sept 08, and one think I am SO thankful for is that we moved back when we did and I got to spend four months with my dad before he got sick, and then i was around to help care for him and help out my mum after he was diagnosed. My worst nightmare when we were living in the Uk was that something would happen and we wouldn't get a chance to get back in time. I don't know your personal circumstances, and I appreciate it may be difficult with regards to time, jobs and money but physical contact is so important at this time. i was very lucky to have a job that were only too happy to allow me time off to spend with my family. You only have one father- you can have many jobs and money isn't that important in the face of sickness and loss. One thing that I have found over the last few months is that relationships are the most important thing in our lives- and we should make time for them before we don't have them anymore. Italy isn't so far from London, and its not too expensive to get there- would it be possible for you to get there to support your parents? Even if it is the last time you see your dad, at least you will get a proper chance to tell him you love him and to say goodbye. I will be forever grateful that although my dad died young, he didn't die suddenly, so we had a chance to talk about things and tell eachother how we felt. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 Thank you Tara for your prayers, yes I also pray for my mind as well as my wife's mind....Thank you for your support That was very thoughtless of me to make that mistake. I apologise, it was a foolish error... ... the sentiment is never the less for it though. _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
Author TaraMaiden Posted April 26, 2009 Author Share Posted April 26, 2009 sb129 I said this to my mother. I have told her I would come over, but she is insistent she would prefer to wait until he has further tests.... I do not like this, and I told her so.....I am in a dilemma..... But I know it would distress her to know I have interrupted my work to go over now....she would be quite disrupted by that... My younger brother is with her now.... If he was very highly concerned, he would have contacted me by now. So while everything is quite serious, it seems that things may be stable.... It is late here now, but I will ring first thing in the morning..... I know what you are saying is 100% correct. I speak on the telephone to my parents at least 3 times a week. Always, I tell them I love them. Thank you for your caring counsel. _/l\_ Link to post Share on other sites
CM2009 Posted April 26, 2009 Share Posted April 26, 2009 That was very thoughtless of me to make that mistake. I apologise, it was a foolish error... ... the sentiment is never the less for it though. _/l\_ No worries its the thought that counts, at least you were willing to even think enough of me to pray, so I'm very much appreciative Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 But I know it would distress her to know I have interrupted my work to go over now....she would be quite disrupted by that... Isn't it funny how your parents still have your best wishes at heart? On the day my dad died, he told me off for taking another day off work! I thought under the circumstances, it would be OK... All the best, and please keep us posted. Link to post Share on other sites
knaveman Posted April 27, 2009 Share Posted April 27, 2009 Isn't it funny how your parents still have your best wishes at heart? On the day my dad died, he told me off for taking another day off work! I thought under the circumstances, it would be OK... All the best, and please keep us posted. That made me chuckle. I like your dad. Link to post Share on other sites
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