reallyconfused Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 I have been in a realtionship w/a man for over 18 m. Durning this time he was engaged then married. (not to me) We had , what I thought to be a very special close relationship. We spent more time together than most couples I know. I have gone on several trips with him. We have long lunches and dinners in public rest. We have been seen together several times by each others friends. He just got married 3 months ago. We tried to call it off a week prior to his wedding. Unfortunatly when he returend home from his honeymoon and I returned from my long vaction we started up again. Our realtionship seemed to be stronger now that he is married. Well a week 1/2 ago some one took it upon there seves to call his wife at work and tell her about me. What a distater. He told me he told her everything, well he lied. I sent her a letter explaing our realionship and how it evolved. I told her how sorry and ashame I am sor hurting her. I also enclosed a copy of a letter he wrote to me telling me how much he missed me and a music CD he made for me with a drawing on it. He is a artist so she knows it was from him. Now they are saying he is a sexual addict. G how conveniant. He is also saying that he only came to my home for over 18 months and had sex with me. No trips, no gifs, no going in public. He left a message on my voicemail saying I am living in a fantasy world and I am deranged. He is so caught and he hads created his own living hell. I have so much proof on him. Pictures of our clothes together in hotle rooms in Las Veagas and Los Angla, reciepts for palces we have gone saved messages that he left me on my cell phone telling me he issed me and he was thinking of me, even singing songs to me. I am not stupid and I knew I would one day have to defend myself. I am prepared for a fight. I will not be potrayed as some no count cheap sex afffair. Pleease give me your thoughts. Link to post Share on other sites
jalexy Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 are you dense? or just stupid? this man is MARRIED and when you dated him you were involved in an affair? you act like it was the other woman that was inconviencing you. for goodness sakes, he asked her to marry him and NOT YOU. move on and stop meddling in others relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
midori Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 You knew what the story was: he was marrying someone else. No fair crying foul now. I hate to break it to you, but you were just a sexual affair to him. Whatever emotional intimacy the two of you shared was not enough to stop him from marrying someone else. You have nothing to prove, there is nothing for you to salvage. All you're doing with your evidence and your revelations is hurting his wife. Which perhaps is your intention. But that's not going to make you feel better, really, is it? Just drop it. You've lost nothing because you had nothing to begin with. Go out and find someone who's not married or about to become so. Link to post Share on other sites
Meredith Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 I ask because I just read an article in US magazine at the laundromat and Halle Berry's husband supposedly had a "sex addiction" too. hehe. sorry for the irreverence but I don't have anything else to say. Link to post Share on other sites
Fancy Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 Oh my goodness. Do you honestly think that because you have saved messages, receipts, and CDs with his drawings on it that somehow you're validated???? Face it: you were used. If he had any true feelings for you or any respect whatsoever, he would have married you, not her. You say you're prepared for a fight, but my advice is to save your energy. You're fighting for a loser. Cut your losses and move on. He'll never leave his wife. You're nothing more to him than a piece of meat. I hate to be harsh, but it seems that you're a bit deluded here. Please wake up and smell the coffee. Link to post Share on other sites
cenilla Posted October 21, 2003 Share Posted October 21, 2003 MSRRIED, but having an affair with other women, he is committed Infidelity!!!! sex-addicted or not, neither of them change the term of Infidelity! As simple as that, what are you confused about? Link to post Share on other sites
mixedup1 Posted October 25, 2003 Share Posted October 25, 2003 arrrrrg!!! In no way, shape or form is this viscious act (adultery) anything to brag about. Until you feel the pain of your spouse cheating on you, do you realize how much turmoil you have caused this new bride. It's a very dispicable act I think. I have been on the non cheating , or faithful side myself. So I got to feel that pain when my wife told me she had an affair... I would rather have died almost, the pain, emotions, lack of trust, paranoia, mood swings, you name it. IT SUX ...the wife feels like half her family died inside I am sure. Its nothing to even consider in my bood. just cause it happens more and more somthing should be done. Link to post Share on other sites
VASH THE STAMPEDE Posted October 25, 2003 Share Posted October 25, 2003 HEY,I'm for badgering people who have done wrong in any aspect of life,whether is cheating or hurting someone's feelings. But I think a couple of you posters are out of line you make it sound like she was the only one initiating a good fuc*,That it was all her fault . The guy also knew what he was doing,you were both wrong and equally accountable for what you did . But, I have to agree you have nothing to fight for,especially for this loser,unless he's trying to publicly humiliate you or cost you your job. Leave his wife alone,you'll just hurt her .He's already doing a good job at it. If he loved her he wouldn't have cheated on her at any time. So move on with your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts