imjustagirl Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 My boyfriend and I went out and met some people for his hobby (star gazing). He introduced me as a "very good friend." I was immediatly angered and resentful as he sleeps 7 nights a week at my apartment, uses the bathroom, shower, eats my food, has sex with me, yet I was lowered on the totum pole to "very good friend." I didn't mention anything at first, just trying to get a read from him all evening long, it was the normal mushy stuff he throws around when other people are around....holding my hand, giving me little pec's. So later when we got home, he decided he was going to get all frisky. I was like yea, why not. Well, in the middle of it, I decided, that no, I wasn't in the mood and we were going to talk about this. He immedialty said...ooh babe, you know that isn't what I ment. So I explained this little analogy how someone you spend 99% of your day with and you think that you are exclusive boyfriend/girlfriend and the SO introduces you to perfect strangers as a "very good friend" that the other person feels that they have dropped in status. He got all defensive and said that he was trying to be professional and thought it would have been inconsiderate to introduce me as such. Then went on to say, "well, would you have rathered I introduced you as my hetero-lifemate." I was even offended at that...hetero lifemate? He told another couple, 3 weeks prior, we had never met before that I "definatley had wife potential" now I'm "hetero lifemate?" UGH! Maybe I'm blowing this out of proportion. What would you think if this occured in your current situation with your SO. Also, any what would you have said? I'm feeling really stupid expecially after bragging him up so much the past few weeks. I love the guy dearly, and would do anything for him....but to be introduced as the "friend" totally ruined my perception of our relationship Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 hetero lifemate ROTFL! That's great! Points to him for creativity. This is a molehill. Don't make it a mountain. Figure out what you want to call each other. 'Girlfriend' and 'boyfriend' sounds highschool after, well, high school. So then what - 'partner' is the best a lot of people have come up with but that's pretty lame. 'My lover' is a bit too graphic. . Maybe LoveShackers should create a nice new term and unleash it on the world because so far, the ones that exist are bad at best. Or maybe we could maybe go with 'my companion' and hope that eventually its slightly impersonal flavour would eventually become sauced up to mean something more significant than 'the person who's with me at the moment' Once again, semantics rears its little head. I would not get bugged about being a 'very good friend' until you two can come up with something to call each other. Link to post Share on other sites
Author imjustagirl Posted October 20, 2003 Author Share Posted October 20, 2003 It wouldn't bother me as much, but he introduces me to perfect strangers that we have no intention of ever seeing again as "my girlfriend." I don't know, I guess I was just concerned. I figured as we were pretty much living together, I would be at least given the same "title" he has always given me throughout. You are right tho...girlfriend/boyfriend does sound...highschoolish. Hetero lifemate....that's my boy coming up with crazy crap out of his a$$ Maybe, possibly, LS'ers could go with "bed buddies"...but then, knowing myself, I would be embarrassed if he would have used that. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted October 20, 2003 Share Posted October 20, 2003 bed buddies Cute! Think I'll start a new thread for this. It'll cheer me up. Link to post Share on other sites
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