"needing Time And Space"

[Dixiecron]

Maybe things work out, maybe they don't. Just chill for a bit. Do some reading about reconciling relationships (google things like "marriage reconciliation") to get an idea of what you are in for if this is going to go the distance. You guys have a lot of talking and work to do.

[davej]

there is definately alot of work ahead for you... But honestly, it's work I'd love the opportunity to "work" on! Best wishes!!!

[davej]

after 6 weeks apart (she left me) with the no-contact rule... I wrote a fairly long-winded letter to her that I originally wasn't going to send (kinda therapeutic to write on the pc, sorta like a diary).. Well, in a drunken moment this weekend while crying in my beer, I mailed her the letter. 7 pages compressed into one sentenance, it said" i still love you, i'd like to give things a second try, hope you feel the same, call me, i'm NOT calling you. This is a real abbreviated version of my "story", but hopefully I still got the point across!? How wrong was I, (if wrong at all).. what should I do, to "apologize" for breaking the no-contact, or have I don't enough already? Thanks guys!

[justaregularguy]

Well, after all that, turns out "the break" was in fact because of someone else. Made worse by the fact she didn't have "the balls" to tell me when she had SOOO many opportunities to do so - even asked her point blank.

Amazing how small the world is and it's almost comical to think that I wouldn't find out - but I did.

 

Life will go on and it's unfortunate I had to find out the hard way. Have absolutely no desire to talk to her again considering she lied about various things as "cover up".

 

It's definitely going to be hard to trust people again considering the kind of person I am and what I did for her - what did I do to deserve this? who knows - but suffice to say it was a most valuable life / relationship lesson.

 

Once again, good luck to everyone else on here.

[Dixiecron]

Regularguy,

 

Don't worry, she'll reap what she's sowed sooner or later. Don't be the one to pick up the pieces after that happens. Take some time for yourself and if you happen to meet a good woman before you're completely over the trust issue, just let her know (gently) that you may be a bit gun-shy. If she's a good one she'll work with you on that.

 

Davej,

 

You've done exactly what you needed to do. Now is the time to initate no-contact for real, and you have to be serious about it this time. Unless she says: "I want you back", none of her attempts to contact you should be replied to. Eventually she will come back or you will be over her. Either way, it is good.

[Evanescence]

Ugh Dave! What did I tell you about that letter! You know how I feel about it. And don't apologize for breaking the no contact rule. If anybody should be apologizing it should be her! What is done is done, but don't be surprised if she calls u after, just be prepared for what you are going to say to her if she does. And don't start apologizing for anything. You didn't do anything wrong! I agree with dixiecron though, do the real NO CONTACT thing now. Absolutly nothing! Hope everything works out for u!

Take care!

[justaregularguy]

Thanx dixie.

 

I guess it's just so hard to accept that after all the "great vibes" she was giving me right up until "the end" - out of ABSOLUTEL nowhere I was apparently dropped like a hot potato - and then only to find out somone else was in the picture..... I wish I could share with the forum here all the emails / text messages I received - and then the abrupt end.....

 

You're definitely right about the trust thing though... Took me almost 3 years of being "single" and just casually dating to finally let my guard down so to speak and make an actual effort with someone - and this is what I get. Oh well, since I had such a great time being single BEFORE, I guess I'll just get back into the game again - albeit pretty bitter and jaded which probably isn't too good for whoever I end up dating next - tragic really...... It's funny cuz I thought, how could I possibly want to give up this great single life before getting into *this* particular "relationship". However, I took a huge chance with this one and it was probably the best 5 months of I've ever had with a woman - and yet it backfires BIG TIME.

 

Life sure has a funny way of teaching us lessons - and by God will I use this as a lesson... I hope all of you do the same with your respective situations.

 

Take care everyone and keep in touch.

[Mollyanna]

We broke up exactly 1 month ago today. He needed time and space because his divorce was still hurting him a lot and he jumped into somethng with me way too quickly. We went a total of one whole day not talking on the phone and then eventually it led to us seeing each other more and more and then back to emailing and calling each other all hours of the day and night again. Suddenly I was back to spending time with him and his children and then the past two weekends we have gotten together with friends at a bar and have ended up going home with each other and sleeping together again. Suddenly I was starting to wonder if we were even broken up at all!

 

He must have felt the same way and freaked out again. He told me before that he needed time and space but neither of us paid that any attention. And now I am miserable because he hasn't returned any of my calls or emails in 2 days. And I have become a crazy person, emailing him every couple of hours begging him to tell me what is wrong. Suddenly he has dropped off the face of the earth - just when I thought we were getting back together.

 

It is 2 AM in the morning and I am STILL fighting the urge to call him again or to send him another email. But last night i said in the last email that he obviously didn't want to talk to me so that would be my last attempt to contact him.

 

Shoot, I know that is is a lie. I am just trying to convince myself not to contact him. But what the hell just happened? Can someone help me not call or write to him? He is the love of my life. There has been no one like him. But this is just plain crazy to keep calling and writing to him. I know I am making it worse, but for some reason I am like an addict and can't stop.

[Mollyanna]

I know he needs space and time, so why am I going nuts here? What all of a sudden do I feel this sudden compulsion to email him and call him? I promised myself yesterday I was done. Even in the email to him, I told him that would be my last contact. But I called today anyway and he didn't answer. And I emailed and said "I know I said I wouldn't write but I am horribly upset that you are even throwing away a friendship with me too"

 

Still nothing... this loss of control is killing me. I have no way to fix this. I have no control over this situation. I can't make him talk to me. But I have to know what is going on? Why when things were going so well did he drop off the face of the earth?

 

And why oh why I am acting like a looney-tune over this? How do I stop this obsession?

[davej]

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but I am in a similar situation as you. My girlfriend of 5+ years left in feb, and we haven't had contact since. I too feel the urge EVERY DAY to contact her (and I must admit, I have written a letter, and called once), neither of which had the response I was hoping for. As far as why do you feel the way you do?? I think the answer is you LOVE(d) him/her. It is normal to miss them and even "obsess" over them, I know I do! My best recommendation, is make yourself a list of things you've always wanted to do, and never done (be reasonable) and set a goal do to one of them per week. With no S/O there is noone to schedule around, or try to please. The only person you have to please is yourself. How can you make someone else happy if you can't make yourself happy? (think about that last sentenance, it was said to me, and the more I think about it, the more it makes perfect sense!)

 

-Dave

[Dixiecron]

Mollyanna,

 

I have gone through a similar thing myself over the past 5 months or so.

 

To be honest, I think you may be coming across as too needy to this guy right now. Just let go. It is easy to say, and so damn hard to do, but just don't call or e-mail.

 

To be brutally honest, I would have to say that you are in the process of learning, the hard way, that recently separated or divorced people are NOT good prospects for developing a real relationship. My ex taught me this lesson and it is one I will never forget. If you want to read my story it is in the "decipher this please" thread on the Second Chances board. You are not alone.

 

Regularguy,

 

It is all good (you will see this sooner than you might think). Just keep on trucking.

 

I actually had a funny thing happen over the last few days. I bagged out on going out last Saturday with my best friend and his wife since he told me after I had accepted the invite that my ex would be there with the guy she's seeing right now (she is a friend of my friend's wife).

 

So I'm out with him tonight for St. Patty's, and he's telling me about saturday evening and how my ex is treating this guy like crap and he just blows her off when she whines, they're getting in a huge argument at dinner, etc... My friend and his wife basically just had to cut the night short and leave. I started laughing when I heard this. I was pissed off when I first found out that she was going to show up with the guy, but in a way I'm almost sorry I missed the free show. Even her own friends are not liking her much anymore. What goes around truly does come around.

 

PM me if you want to keep in touch.

[Mollyanna]

Dave and Dixie: You both had some very good points. Thank You!

 

I don't want to come across as needy and I do come across that way to him right now. ESPECIALLY NOW.

 

You won't believe this story. It has been 2 hours since I got off the phone with him and I am still in shock over where my mind just took me the past 3 days. Read this for the laugh of your life and for a look into my really screwed up mind. I think I need some help. I am serious. I am going to go see someone.

 

He finally just called. I almost didn't answer it, I was so angry. But instead I just asked how he was and if he was OK? Good thing I decided to be nice. He hasn't received a single one of my calls. He said a number keeps showing up saying Unknown or something like that. And his computer is at home. He hasn't been takiing it to work. (He takes the computer places all the time. I have known this!!! ) At home, he doesn't have DSL yet. so he had no access to email.

 

OMG I am so embarassed. THANK GOD, I did not write anything bad or yell at him or anything in these emails. But i still look like a complete and total moron. I went ahead and told him what all the emails said and what my thinking was this whole time, but he will probably just die when he sees the emails that I wrote. He thinks I am nuts. He laughed and laughed and laughed about it and i laughed so hard i was crying. laughing not so much because it was so funny - but because I was soooo embarassed.

 

 

But now I know I have made things worse anyway. He is going to think about this and realize WHOA - this girl has issues that I am not ready to deal with - and all the progress we just made in the passed 2 weeks has went down the drain...

[situationsmend]

does everyone think I'm an idiot for thinking about taking my girl back??? I mentiones earlier that

she says she wants another shot at us being together, but I keep hearing from

friends that it might not be a good idea.

 

 

we were together for 5 good years we're both 24( lots of love, lots of fun, mutually), but eventually she grew distant and I asked her and she broke up with me because she was having feelings of wanting to live on her own and be on her own after having been with me so long. She was having confused feelings about her life, so we broke up and she moved out. Then a month later, she moved back in wanting to make it NEW. After three months, she grew distant again, Hanging out with friends til all hours sometimes. So we broke up again, for the same reasons. I have been really hurting over it.

 

So moved out and got her own place, but we've stayed in touch for 3 months, hanging out every once in a while.

The problem was never that she didnt love me or didn't find me attractive, she knows how good I am to her, what i

would do for her, how awesome we get along and are good for each other.....but she just felt she hadn't lived her own life yet, because we met when she was 19. So i supported her decision with a broken heart. Since this last break up, i would periodcially ask where she was at with "us" and she would always say, "I'm sorry, i don't know, i know i'm hurting you, but i'm still confused, i'm so so so sorry", just know I love you.

 

NOW, she's coming back stronger. Last weekend she came over, we had dinner, we talked, we got snuggly then we got intimate for the first time in a long time, had sex three times in one night, the next night she came over again, we had sex a bunch of times again, telling each other we missed each other and that we loved each other. then the next day we had a "talk" she admitted she was wrong, this seperation is all wrong, she loves me, she always did, she feels so stupid for leaving, horrible for hurting me etc. She doesn't feel like she deserves me but begged me to forgive her and take her back. She says i'm so incredible and the best person for her and she really really wants to be with me and us to have a fresh start again.

 

A lot of the people she was hanging out with from her job and friends, around the time of our first 2 break-ups, have sort of ditched her, because she's been so miserable the past 7/8 months. I wonder if she is just coming to me because she's lonely or

if she really realizes her reasons for leaving and having fun with friends that really werent there for her, was stupid.

 

Anyway..................that's the story in a short version. If you guys think i'm stupid for trying to reconcile and take her out on a nice

date....then tell me. I'm not going to fall all over myself for her, i know things need to be 50/50 and i've told her that.

 

 

 

 

Okay so that's it....I want to make things work, i want to take her out on an awesome date tonight and talk things out. do wasting my time???

 

If you do, tell me, give me your advice, i have no one good to talk to, just buddies, but they don't know what love is...

 

If i'm being dumb, tell me so I can go out and give my love and help to other people in need. I want to volunteer and

help people less fortunate.

[MarKus]

Hi situationsmend

That great

 

No your not wasting your time or being dumb. i would love to be in your situation right now.

 

But dont try too hard, just be yourself, treat her the same like you treated her in the past, and take things slow. Thats all i can say (thats what i would do)

 

 

 

You can help me just read my post in this thread from the other day, and see if you can give me a bit of advice on my situation

 

cheers

MarKus

[Mollyanna]

situationsmend,

 

First of all, I don't think you are stupid at all. You love her. It is never stupid to let yourself feel love. However, I think it would be very unwise if you jump back into her arms wholeheartedly without bracing your fall.

 

She might leave you again. She might decide next week she changed her mind again. She said she needed to live her life on her own - but she hasn't really done that still, has she? Even though you were broken up, you guys were still in constant contact. What happens if you end up married and THEN she decides she never got that break from you that she needed?? It might be unrepairable after she cheats on you, or separates from you, or divorces you. And your poor little heart will be crushed!!!

 

I worry that she will need that break again soon. Why did she need it in the first place? Ask yourself if that reason has changed? Has anything really been resolved between the two of you? If not, you are destined to repeat history.

 

I guess if I were in your situation right now, I would take it VERY VERY slowly with her. Why can't you just date once in a while? Don't jump into it full fledged again so soon.

 

I say do the date, but just the date. Don't become an insta-couple that night.

[davej]

hey man, I agree with everyone else.... You're NOT dumb for wanting her back. (I too am 24, was in a relationship 5+ years, she left me), I also have lots of friends that say "forget it man, it's only a woman".. You're right, they don't understand... I've been apart 6 weeks now, and you can bet that I still want her back!!! More than anything as a matter of fact. But honestly man, try not to let your feelings cloud your vision. By all means, try to work things out, and live happily after. But look at the "big" picture. DON'T do it because you miss the companionship, or the person to be waiting for you when you get home from work, or someone to make love to...... Go back because you L O V E her and you are SURE she loves you back!! That's my 2 cents! Best of luck!

 

-Dave

[girlblue]

Last Friday, after 8 months my boyfriend told me that he "needs some time." I pressed him on why and he said something that he's sort of been saying all along -- that I scare him because I'm perfect and I make him think of marriage (started saying this at 2 months). He's not sure that he's ready for that. I told him that I'm not ready either and I'm not asking him to be, at first he said that made him feel better, but still insisted he needed time away to think and that he "just wanted to do right by me." I told him this wasn't a question he had to answer right now and he said, but it would be worse if we go on and end up breaking up in 2 years or divorced.

 

This really came out of nowhere for me. We were doing great and I know that he loves me. We're both in our late 20's, I think a lot of it has to do with his rebelling against getting old -- like he's got it in his head that being committed means acting like an adult in all other aspects of his life and giving up things he considers youthful.

 

He is painfully honest and even though I'm a very skeptical person I really believe that he's being completely honest. We talked about this on Saturday -- he came to my house and before we even said anything to each other he started crying -- more like full on sobbing and I've never seen him like that.

 

On the phone a day later, I asked him if he really considers this time off or more final and he said he didn't know, he has a lot of thinking to do and it could go either way. I asked what he tells people -- break-up or time off and he said he's said both. I said I needed to know because it would affect how I moved on. He said for my own sake I should consider it final because "life's too short." (I felt like he felt this is what he had to say). When I mentioned that my dating someone else might preclude us getting back together he asked if I had a guy waiting in the wings -- I said no, but if I start dating someone next week it might change things. He got choked up about this and said he had to go.

 

What does this all mean? I'm a basketcase about this, I really thought he was the one.

[Geoffrey]

Girlblue,

 

I completely understand your predicament....I am going through a similar thing. Here's my tragic story....

 

I was together with a gal in an LDR for six months, it was absolutely wonderful...she said I was the closest thing to a true love she EVER knew...but I broke up with her at six months because I became confused about what I wanted...we had both gone through divorces and my relationship with her happened so fast....I just didn't take the time to get over my ex-wife completely ...so I buried the feelings....and they resurfaced....so I broke it off with her to try to put myself back together....she was absolutely crushed.....it really wasn't fair, I didn't process my feelings very well, I should have asked her for help in dealing with this, not running away.

 

Anyway, we never were out of touch longer than six weeks, and three months ago I finally wrote her a long letter after I got my head together and sought reconciliation. Now I find she has been on the phone with another guy almost every day for the past year, who was once a close friend helping her though her breakup with me and has now taken on a life of its own....and she is confused....and is faced with making a choice. Him or me?

 

So here is Geoffrey. sitting like a dope and WAITING for her to sort out her life....I made her a damn good offer...I told her I would make good on every promise I made before we broke up...and some were quite heavy...but I MEAN it....

 

She told me her feelings for this other guy (which is also a LDR) really came to light about a month ago....she met him, nothing really happened, nothing much in common....so why the hell is she so crazy about him??? I don't get it...hey, I came back...yes, I needed my space....about six months' worth....but I DID come back to her....I get so many mixed signals, now we're not talking because I want her to have the space she gave to me....it's the LEAST I can do after all she went through on account of me....I told her I would be here as a friend....it's been three days and I miss her TERRIBLY....

 

We both agreed that past a certain point, there we no guarantees...she does have feelings for me, I am secure in knowing that, but who knows where HER space will take her.....

[MarKus]

Hi Mollyanna,

 

I have been reading your posts, i was like you were, texting and ringing all the time in the first week. it lets them know how you feel, but try not 2 overdo it.

I know if i ever try to text or contact my gf/ex she will respond, but im just trying not to do it.

 

In my situation we have been on a break nearly 2.5 months after being together nearly 3 years!

 

She text me nearly 2 weeks ago saying

 

"do you reckon we should meet up and have a chat sometime"

 

i replied yes, but i havnt got a responce as of yet,

i do wanna meet her, but i dont know what she wants to have a chat about?

I have many things to say 2 her about our past (read my other post) and our present, even a part of me dosnt want to meet her, as if i dont want to give her the satisfaction

 

I know deep deep down she must have feelings for me, because she had so much love for me which was (obsessive) at times. she might be being stubborn at the the moment, or just wanting to listen and be with her friends, thats why im not giving up (just yet)

 

I have gone on nights out with mates and done things but

im really hurting at the moment and i know you are hurting at the moment, but......

 

can i say this mollyanna,

it makes me feel better, and it might make you feel better, I think your WELL CUTE in that picture!

 

MarKus

[Mollyanna]

MarKus - you just made my night. Thank You for your kind words. You said that was 2 weeks ago that she wrote that? Have you tried calling her since then?

 

I know people say this NO CONTACT rule works but well.... not if both sides are playing the game. And it IS a game! One of you needs to quit the stubbornness and reach out.

 

Geoffrey:

When I just read your post, I wondered if you were My ex writing. My ex is the divorced one and I am the woman he ran to after the divorce. And like you, we moved entirely too fast. And like you, he suddenly couldn't breathe and little things set him off so much that he realized he was not over her or all the pain she inflicted upon him by cheating on him, asking for a divorce, and the next day the guy moves in when my ex left. And they have 3 beautiful children together - that he now only sees every other weekend. His whole life was destroyed and he never saw it coming.

 

I am comforted by the fact that you took the time you needed to heal and now you are ready to try again with this new woman. It gives me hope. He and I still talk almost every day and it is awkward and stuff sometimes, but I hope somehow we can get through this. I wish you the best of luck too. and please keep me updated. You are my hope right now that miracles CAN happen. And I do believe they will happen to you. I think she might be testing you right now. Please DO NOT go out yourself and find someone else too just yet. Or this vicious cycle may never end!!

[Geoffrey]

Mollyanna,

 

Hmmm....your picture doesn't look familiar!

 

No, it's really interesting....I was just out for the evening and I found a little something that I am going to send her....perhaps against my better judgement in light of the "no contact" rule....it's a little bracelet that has individual letter beads that spell out "Love waits." Man, the timing couldn't be better...I kinda have the feeling this is some sort of test....

 

Thanks for writing....I will do my very best for you!

 

As for you and your ex, you are both still in the game. And there is LOTS of time left on the clock.

 

Keep encouraged.

 

Geoffrey

[MarKus]

Geoffrey,

 

Yes you did come back to her, and thats great.

but as for the other guy, you ran the risk of something like that happening

 

but we all wish we can turn back the clock and i bet your thinking you wished you spoke to her about your feelings in the first place, at the moment she might be testing you as mollyanna said.

 

Its up to you wheather or not you send the bracelet or not, whatever you do, good luck.

 

 

Mollyanna,

 

Thats quite alright, hope i brought a smile to your face!, you did me!

 

No i havnt called her, but i did reply to her message a few hours after. so its up to her now when we meet, seeing as she suggested it in the first place (2 weeks ago). I dunno what she would want a chat about?

A couple days before she sent me that message about wanting a chat, i get a call from an unknown number which im sure 100% was her,

i was angry but scared, but i just couldnt bring myself to answer it, then it rang a second time and i still didnt answer.

 

how is your situation now?

have you spoke to him again?

 

 

MarKus

[Geoffrey]

Hi Markus, thank you for your kind words.

 

I sent the bracelet this morning.

 

At this point, I have nothing to lose, and everything to gain. Yes, you are right, there was a risk of something like that happening...at one time there was an almost 100% chance I would NOT have gone back to her...but after a period of time I chose to try, try again. I realized just how much I missed her and still loved her...and how empty my life is when she isn't around.....

 

I can be mature about this whole thing, my life won't suddenly stop...just because she needs some room to work out her personal life....I am trying very hard to show respect for her feelings and needs...and if I can maintain my own quiet dignity in the process, that may very well carry the day...after all, she DID graciously give me the room I needed at the time I needed it....how can I do anything less for her?

 

And if indeed she chooses NOT to come back, I will know I did the right thing by her. A clear conscience means some thing to me...

 

Yes, waiting sucks, but after all...she waited SIX MONTHS for me to come around... and she NEVER expected me to even consider coming back....but we never stayed out of touch longer than six weeks...she maintained her loving feelings for me...through it all...I am only trying to love her through this difficult time...I want to BE THERE for her...like she was for me....

 

She is working through MUCH MORE than just making a decision....there are other large personal dragons she is trying to battle right now....I know I am only the tip of the iceberg....

 

To all who are reading this.....DO THE LOVING THING. Put your anger aside, reach out, and forgive....it's VERY LIBERATING!!! Love does not rejoice in wrongdoing....

[Mollyanna]

Geoffrey: I am glad to hear about the bracelet. I think that is beautiful and I am glad you sent it. I wish I could find something touching to send to my ex.

 

MarKus: Well... I spoke to him yesterday and we made plans to get together this Sunday as usual (but that is just as a group of friends like we always have). However, I REALLY need to talk to him tonight. You see, I met another guy a few months before I ever met my ex. And it was just bad timing for us so we never went out. But I have been seeing him around more and more and last night he kissed me. This other guy is supposed to call me in a couple of hours to see if we can do something together tonight. (I have been kinda blowing him off all day while I think about the compllications it can cause. Told him I was busy all day.) I am trying to get ahold of my ex and find out if this is a good idea or not to go on a date with someone else.

 

I mean, we are broken up and I shouldn't just sit here and wait on him, should I? I don't want to look like I will wait forever and seem too accessible. But I don't want to cause any problems either. So I thought I should tell him about the date. My best friend says that is absolutely the wrong thing to do - that my ex has no business knowing - because he is the one who broke up with me. But I would still feel like I was doing something wrong if I didn't at least tell him first.

 

Wish me luck guys. Tomorrow evening, both guys will be in the same place I will be at and I am not sure how to act at all. I am not trying to hurt anyone - I am just trying to find someone to love and who will love me.

[miscel]

I totally understand the need for time and space but for how long do you really wait. In my situation it is not that easy. I have to see my ex on a regular basis and I dont know how to act when I am around him. I get so nervous and I just want to grab him and hold him. I don't know what to do when he comes to see the baby?

 

My boyfriend and I just had a baby together 8 months ago. We have been together for about a year. He is 10 years younger than me but we have such a wonderful time together. We have been fighting a bit off and on lately. I have been a bit moody and sensitive and havent handled things that bother me very well. I believe its post partum.

 

Just the other day I asked my boyfriend if we could talk about whats been happening. I asked him if we could work out all this fighting and that I have been a bit erratic with my behavior since the baby and that I was sorry for that but I needed to know if he was willing to try and get things back to the way they were. He said yes we could try. He tells me he loves me buts its not the same as before because of the arguing.

 

Basically the talk didnt go well after that, I was crushed to hear that he didnt feel the same. We are not together now. Can he not understand that I am still hormonal after having the baby? And Im confused about him saying that we could try to work it out and then that he doesn't know if he feels the same.

 

He has a hard time talking about what he is feeling inside. Its difficult to get anything out of him sometimes. The first time he told me he loved me was right after we had the baby. It was very hard for him, he cried when he told me. It meant so much to me when he did. Because I knew how hard it was for him to open himself up like that. (He had been cheated on and hurt pretty bad in a relationship two years before me.) Anyhow, I know he loved me very much but how can his love change so quickly?

 

Please help me. I know that we can work this out. I want so badly to be with him especially after having a new baby. I really love him and am so confused and hurt and I dont what to do to get him back.

 

 

 

I wrote him a letter telling him that I understand the feelings he is having with being a new dad and all, and that I am sorry I may not of been more supportive. I put down my feelings of how I feel and how I think we can be there for each other with just better communication and understanding. I also told him that if I dont get a response back to this letter that I will take it as a sign to move on, and that I will move on. If he truly doesn't love me anymore than I will not wait for someone who does not love me. I have done that before, will not do it again.

 

I hope I didnt sound like I was giving him an ultamatum but that he knows I won't play games either.

 

Was the letter a bad idea? I just can't waste my time waiting, I have to focus and move on for myself and the baby. I'm so confused on what to do and it's only been about a week.

 

HELLLLP!!