Wicked Child Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Ok seriously...Do FWB's usually cuddle, spend the night spooning, kiss goodbye and leave you to sleep while they go pick up their kids? (with whom you watch cartoons with upon return?) Cos I really don't think that's FWB behavior, and am a little confused on what to do. I dig it tho...that's for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted May 10, 2009 Share Posted May 10, 2009 Wait till they call you again. And it has to be for something in the daytime (or in full view of the public eye), away from the sheets. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wicked Child Posted May 10, 2009 Author Share Posted May 10, 2009 Well that's not going to be a problem...We been hookin up weekly for several months...pretty much been followin his lead the whole time..Lately, tho things have seemed to become a little more than just a romp since I've been spending the night..he's not too shy about PDA either, when we do meet up with others... Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted May 11, 2009 Share Posted May 11, 2009 It doesn't sound like FWB, but that's what it is unless somebody says otherwise...just talk to him about it, when the time feels right to do so. Among people, there does tend to be a various of definition of FWB, "dating", or whatever...find out how he defines those things. Link to post Share on other sites
Nanook Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 I think friends with benefits behavior can be almost anything, as long as there is no relationship intentions behind it. The only thing that struck me as odd in the original post was that you watched cartoons with his kids.... Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 The only thing that struck me as odd in the original post was that you watched cartoons with his kids.... Yea that's more like a family affair I'm curious, any update WC? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 Maybe he's a commitment-phobe. Keep it casual and non-commited and he's all-in.... Does he sleep with other women? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 FWB simply means 'NO COMMITMENT' period. It could be sex only... sex with some dating... but it means that it's not exclusive and no strings... Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 Maybe he's a commitment-phobe. Keep it casual and non-commited and he's all-in.... Problem here is that the OP is enjoying it immensely...I say problem because we only want more and more of things we enjoy and things grow to be more significant over time...then find out he's still not into committing...even if it's enjoyable, it always ends up in disaster or a waste of time...course I'm speaking from experience here But if both people are commit-phobes, I guess it's a perfect match... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 But if both people are commit-phobes, I guess it's a perfect match... Yes, and this thread by the OP might be instructive: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t176442/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wicked Child Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 The only thing that struck me as odd in the original post was that you watched cartoons with his kids.... Yea that's more like a family affair I'm curious, any update WC? Nothing new as of yet...same ol, same ol...Something I did find rather odd last week tho...He invited me over for what seemed like an evening romp...but ended up being a poker game with him & his guys...Which was totally awkward considering we've kept things under wraps since the beginning...Ha, my friend swears he did it so his buddies could size me up..Which makes more sense to me than having a random girl crash your sausage fest poker party...but everyone's MO's are different...so whatever. It was amusing, and I took a few hands in that game...so hopefully I made a good impression Link to post Share on other sites
LoveLace Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 Well then, to me it sounds like more than FWB is on his mind. My guy friends have always told me ya gotta be pretty special to be included in their "sausage fest" hang-outs. Chances are his buds thought you are cool, and as if you passed a test of some sort, so yea, I'm thinkin it's beyond FWB...maybe not a relationship, but something in between. It IS odd to be invited for such a thing..there's a reason for that....unless they've had other girlfriends with them before and it's not something that bothers them, but most men I know, would be a bit bothered that Johnny brought along his gal to poker night. Does he ever or has ever been vocal about what he thinks of you, or how he feels about you? Some are just better with actions, but I'm just wondering about more details..at some time did you 2 say, "FWB, that's it!"...or what? Ever discussed the possibilities and/or consequences that can come out of it? If no, would you like to? I'm just thinking if you are wanting to have "that talk" with him, maybe this isn't a bad point in time to do it...waiting it out longer is an option, too. I'm not clear on how concerned you are about where it's going, so whatever you do depends on that I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
White Flower Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 It sounds like he is enjoying a R with you but has not (and maybe never will) partake in a commitment. You decide what you want and lay it on the table. Ask him if he sees it going anywhere or will it always be more of the same. Then you decide what you want after that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wicked Child Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 Yeah, we have never discussed any of what's going on at all...Just kinda go with the flow...I mean he'll compliment my bedroom skills....And the only time he's ever said anything about what he feels was when we first hooked up (we didn't sleep together the first time..) and he told me he's liked me since he met me...Other than that, there's not much else to go on...I mean, I'd like to discuss it a little, but I don't want him immediately thinking that I want him to slap a ring on my finger and call me wifey, yanno? But I've been with my share of men who only want the booty, and none of them have ever acted like that...Ever. This guy totally reads all my Facebook stuff, and seems to remember everything I post or write about...Plus, he's always concerned when I'm not feeling well, or in a bad mood...But I'll be damned if we actually hang out..He's met me at the bar a few times when I've been out with friends..Always buys them drinks and stuff..Won't let us pay for anything, not to mention the fact that he'll be publicly affectionate...My friend that's pretty much been witness to all of it says he stands around me like he's claiming his territory...lol. I thought about taking the "concerned about my health" part, and just askin him if he's sleepin with anyone else just so I know for my own safety..cos we don't use anything...But I don't know if that would be offensive or not. When we first met (at work) I was pretty jaded on relationships and the like and stressed that I don't bother with that drama...I'm thinking that has a little to do with this...either it cemented this FWB thing, or it's hindering any further progression... Ok, enough of this rambling....I'm starting to not make sense to myself... Link to post Share on other sites
White Flower Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 You should not be afraid to have that health talk. You are sleeping together, so you should be talking about sexual health together. Ket us know how the talk went;) Link to post Share on other sites
americanflyer Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 You're digging it and he seems to be going more into a relationship with you. Just chill and see how it goes. Sounds to me he's digging it too. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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