christina01 Posted October 23, 2003 Share Posted October 23, 2003 me and my ex split a while ago, he cheated on me and is previosly in the relationship with her still. ever sinse he makes calls constantly, talks of nothing but the past, mentioned 'ex sex' on a few occasions, and always wants to meet, plus he mentions tiny things that we shared in our relationship, which kinda hurt to hear. i recently told him that i cant take it anymore that im sick of having to act like im not over him around him, ever sinse he has tried to get in contact so many times but has sent a reply of 'oh ok' im kinda embarressed to talk to him.....many would say he still wanted me back, but others wouldnt. im not saying i want us to be together again because he was abusive before, i just want to hear the truth so i can go about the situation all right! Link to post Share on other sites
midori Posted October 23, 2003 Share Posted October 23, 2003 It sounds like your ex is a selfish sort of guy. As if cheating on you didn't already prove that. He probably wants to keep the door open with you, so to speak, so that he could -- in theory at least -- sleep with you or even get back together with you if he wanted. It's an ego thing, knowing that you're not over him. I'd cut all contact with him. Change your number if necessary. Block his email address. He'll get the point sooner or later. Link to post Share on other sites
Fancy Posted October 23, 2003 Share Posted October 23, 2003 He's loving the power and control he has over you. It's a huge ego trip for him. If he was abusive to you in the past (as you stated he was), chances are he'll be the exact same way in the future. He's a dead end. Cut all contact and move on to a man who will show you some respect. If you keep responding to this guy, you'll be asking for nothing but pain and conflict. Link to post Share on other sites
DonTomaso Posted October 23, 2003 Share Posted October 23, 2003 Hi Christina... The same thing happened to me only I was acting like your bf. There was no cheating involved so the situation is different, but essentially the same. My motivation for continually contacting my ex was that she told me that we would always be friends when we frist split up. At frist this was hard to deal with, but once I realized that I wanted to have her as a friend, I was determined to be a true friend to her. The problem is, once I was ready to be her friend, I was putting all the effort into the friendship. I just kept trying and trying until things fell apart competely. Now we are no longer on speaking terms. I don't know what you should do in your situation considering your bf is abusive (btw.. do you mean physical or emitional), but all wanted from my ex was an honest conversation so we could end things on a nice note and be supportive of eachother throughout life. Maybe I'm an eternal optimist... From what you wrote, it sounds like midori might be right though... he doesn't sound like he is trying to be your friend or that he's trying to get back together with you. If he wanted to get back together with you, I think he would be honest about it. Let me know if you want any more male perspective. Cheers! Link to post Share on other sites
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