new2marriage Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 Here is my problem: I'm arranged to marry a girl. I'm from eastern culture and I assume you guys know a bit about arranged marriages. I kind of realize now that the girl was not prepared for the marriage in general and neither was too excited / interested in me to begin with. Everyone (family) else was very interested. She might have come into a bit of pressure. Ultimately, decision was left to her. It wasn't like she totally disliked this marriage. We spent quite a bit of time together and we did have some good moments. But it's just that she wasn't prepared for the marriage and didn't quite feel the thing for me (I guess). In her words -- she doesn't see anything wrong with me; nice guy, good job etc etc but she doesn't just know me well at all and she isn't prepared for the marriage yet and she is confused. She told everyone that she needs sometime. She took a few weeks and finally agreed for the marriage. All good. BUT I've a strong feeling and I'm very certain that she came under bit of pressure. We don't connect well. There is no chemistry. It's almost like she doesn't care. We are 1,000 miles away - and that adds to my problem. We are on different time zones. I call her up once every 2-3 days and we talk the usual stuff. It's already getting boring. She is yet to buy her own laptop - which means no chatting etc. Help me guys. How can I make her like me? Tips / action points / advice -- all useful I just want to make her feel comfortable with me; make her feel that her decision was the right one and ultimately make her excited about the marriage and foresee a good married life. -- New2Marriage Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 Is this a forced contractual marriage? Do you have to go through with it? if not - I would step back and decide that this arrangement is not going to work. She does not seem to want to marry you, and is not committing any enthusiasm or involvement. I have to say, this is a very poor way to begin considering coupling with somebody in a long-term arrangement. if she is reluctant now, she will be a reluctant wife. I see very little option but to try to back out of it all together. Link to post Share on other sites
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