gopher Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 I'm tired of dating women and not gay...so I'm left with being asexual. What am I tired of? Women who don't return my call, and days later text me to apologize for being "MIA" Women who keep me around, doing the bare minimum in staying in touch...why in the heck do they bother...and why do I put up with it!!!! Women who have interested in scheduling a date 2, but do not have the guts to just say so. Somehow I'm suppose to read their minds, or maybe if they treat me crappy enough I'll just go away....which I should do!!! The emotionally unavailable women I keep attracting in spite of all the work I've done on myself. I'm tired, worn out and frustrated with myself and dating . I haven't wanted a super model, a porn star or anything like that. I want a cute woman next door that shares my interests, one that finds me interesting and attractive. But, that formula has failed miserably. In the past year, I've gotten active and have a lot of interests, I have a great job, wonderful kids and tons of friends. At 47, I am resigned to the fact, that in spite of my best efforts, I will remain alone... Link to post Share on other sites
Midas Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Man, I'm sorry you're going through this phase. I've been living an asexual alternative lifestyle for the past 17 years. Don't give up. Like you've probably been told before -- the right one will come along. And then suddenly your whole life will seem upside down. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted May 29, 2009 Share Posted May 29, 2009 I'm tired of dating women and not gay...so I'm left with being asexual. What am I tired of? Women who don't return my call, and days later text me to apologize for being "MIA" Women who keep me around, doing the bare minimum in staying in touch...why in the heck do they bother...and why do I put up with it!!!! Women who have interested in scheduling a date 2, but do not have the guts to just say so. Somehow I'm suppose to read their minds, or maybe if they treat me crappy enough I'll just go away....which I should do!!! The emotionally unavailable women I keep attracting in spite of all the work I've done on myself. I'm tired, worn out and frustrated with myself and dating . I haven't wanted a super model, a porn star or anything like that. I want a cute woman next door that shares my interests, one that finds me interesting and attractive. But, that formula has failed miserably. In the past year, I've gotten active and have a lot of interests, I have a great job, wonderful kids and tons of friends. At 47, I am resigned to the fact, that in spite of my best efforts, I will remain alone... Don't spend a moment on unavailable women. I used to, and it did me not a damn bit of good. Let someone else deal with their unavailability. I think you should focus less on trying to get women and spend more time relaxing and enjoying the company of your family and friends. The women ain't goin' anywhere. I think you just need to change the outlook and the approach. p.s. Date foreign women. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted May 29, 2009 Share Posted May 29, 2009 p.s. Date foreign women. Potentially good advice, if nothing else he will have fun and feel better, and you never know, it's easily possible to meet someone really nice. Link to post Share on other sites
Author gopher Posted May 30, 2009 Author Share Posted May 30, 2009 Thanks....Great advice to focus on things other than women....I'm pretty busy with all the tennis teams I'm on. Three of them are mixed doubles teams, so you never know. Hmmmm, I've never dated foreign women...that might be interesting. Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted May 30, 2009 Share Posted May 30, 2009 It's not just foreign women it's women who you need to date of different ethnicities. I mean I'm a black guy who's recently wanting to date other women who are not black and its intriguing to tell you the most. I mean for years I've been stuck in this little confinement box but now even though I havent had sex in a minute I'm open to all women who's willing. lol. Also you gotta put yourself out there for it to happen. Are you in great shape? got money that'll help. Trust your only 47 they made viagra for guys like you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author gopher Posted May 30, 2009 Author Share Posted May 30, 2009 It's not just foreign women it's women who you need to date of different ethnicities. I mean I'm a black guy who's recently wanting to date other women who are not black and its intriguing to tell you the most. I mean for years I've been stuck in this little confinement box but now even though I havent had sex in a minute I'm open to all women who's willing. lol. Also you gotta put yourself out there for it to happen. Are you in great shape? got money that'll help. Trust your only 47 they made viagra for guys like you! Good thoughts!....I'm in really good shape....not sure about the money thing, LOL. I make good money, but my ex-wife is taking some of for the next 2 1/2 years... Plus, thankfully I don't need Viagara... Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 It's not just foreign women it's women who you need to date of different ethnicities. I mean I'm a black guy who's recently wanting to date other women who are not black and its intriguing to tell you the most. I mean for years I've been stuck in this little confinement box but now even though I havent had sex in a minute I'm open to all women who's willing. lol. Also you gotta put yourself out there for it to happen. Are you in great shape? got money that'll help. Trust your only 47 they made viagra for guys like you! I was kinda joshin' about the foreign women thing, but I kind wasn't. The point is, a person has to get out of their comfort zone. Date different women, women you might not have dated up to this point. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 31, 2009 Share Posted May 31, 2009 Seems you were looking too hard..Remember if you chase "it", it will run..If you just relax, focus on you, and when the timing is right, someone WILL walk into your life when you're least expecting it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author gopher Posted May 31, 2009 Author Share Posted May 31, 2009 Thanks...very true, maybe I was looking too hard. Now, I'm not looking at all, so we'll see. Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 If you still jerk off, you're not asexual. I mean, I know what you're saying - you're sick of all the bullsh*t. But your libido is important, and it's not going away even if you might want it to. So where does that leave you? As you say, not looking is the way to go. You have a great job, great kids. Why wouldn't those things be attractive to a smart, down-to-earth woman? Personally I don't think too much about dating and girls - it's a headache, and I have enough activities and guy friends to keep myself occupied. Sure, there's the occasional crushing, debilitating, suicidal loneliness... but I think I've kept that emotion down to an hour a week now Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
ABrokenWing Posted June 9, 2009 Share Posted June 9, 2009 That's just being tired of women, isn't it? I thought asexual was ppl who are uninterested in sex in general. They don't want it, or would rather not have it. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted June 9, 2009 Share Posted June 9, 2009 That's just being tired of women, isn't it? I thought asexual was ppl who are uninterested in sex in general. They don't want it, or would rather not have it. like Morrissey... Link to post Share on other sites
Author gopher Posted June 10, 2009 Author Share Posted June 10, 2009 You all are most likely right, I'm just tired of dating and all that goes with it. I should have called this thread...Transitioning to a confirmed bachelor... Link to post Share on other sites
WineCountry Posted June 10, 2009 Share Posted June 10, 2009 . I mean I'm a black guy who's recently wanting to date other women who are not black What else is new? Dont they all? LOL Ahh just kidding... I dont want the Politically Correct police after me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author gopher Posted June 19, 2009 Author Share Posted June 19, 2009 This past week, my therapist told me I need to think in shades of gray rather than black/white. She encouraged me to be open minded about letting a new relationship develop. Since then, I've seen someone that I may be interested in getting to know better, and she me. I'm trying to be more open minded about things. Link to post Share on other sites
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