My Marriage (long post)

[jwulgaert]

Well I've been having some problems in my marriage, I married my high school sweetheart. We were doing fine until we had children. Not saying we didn't have problems but that is the essence of life eh?.

Regardless.

I did not agree when we got pregnant, as I was still supporting her in school and I was going to go back when she finished. And I behaved like a jerk. To her and sadly enough my child. Time went by and I got over myself and my anger towards her. I started a company, then she graduated with her RN and things started looking up.

She had started going to her parents house (who live an hour or so out of town) every other weekend or so. Her parents never liked me and I was often busy with work, so I didn't oppose her going there or make much effort to go with her. Every monday when she came back though she would come back really pissed off and disgruntled, saying I don't do anything to help her etc... etc... .

Then we had our second child and things got much worse. She was telling me she was going to leave me on a daily basis and take the kids and I would never get to see them (run on sentence I know ) . Well after awhile of this I stepped out and cheated on her. I seemed to gain the confidence from my escapades to tell her exactly how I felt and called her bluff regarding leaving me. And she tried her best to turn over a new leaf. I saw how much effort she was putting in and I came clean about my infidelity.

We started going to a counselor and things started to look better, until ... yep she got pregnant a 3rd time. Since then her parents have been stepping into our marriage, and our/my parenting. Every opportunity the get they seem to take to show how much they disrespect me. I recently brought to their attention the latest offense to me and let them know (and by them I mean my mother in-law.) I was offended and hurt by them going against my parenting wishes and I did not appreciate it. They in turn told me they have no respect for me, and started telling me I mooch off their daughter (I pay the mortgage, gas & electric, Cable services, and water services for the record.). After a conversation with them regarding how horrible I am in their eyes, and insisting I was lying about my contributions to my marriage I told my mother in-law, "I was hoping to be able to walk away with a better understanding of her, but I realize she is just not a decent person.". My wife instead of standing up for me apologized to her parents telling them to ignore what I was saying and how I feel and I was in the wrong.

 

I feel her parents are playing her off of me and doing this with my children also. Whenever I tell my wife how I feel she tells me "Her family has always been there for her and she will not side against them." I admit, I have made mistakes in my marriage and I'm trying to atone for them. 1 am lost and do not know what to do.