Dead_Inside Posted October 29, 2003 Share Posted October 29, 2003 I don't know why I'm posting... haven't wallowed that much (out loud anyway) ... too much time on my hands perhaps. I was the other man for three plus years... I kept getting upset and cooling it off for months at a time, then coming right back to her. Eventually she told her husband, he wanted a divorce, and she sooned moved in with a female friend. Soon I started seeing her again since she was separated and in her own place... I wasn't sure how I felt. I was on the fence, but started getting comfortable again. I wanted to be sure. I was waiting for the divorce to be final before making any overt plans for the future. And of course she started seeing someone else. Funny how this time she took only 3 weeks to tell me instead of the 3 months before telling me she was engaged. "We have to talk" is never a good thing. (heh heh... a week after "the talk" I lost my main (abusive) client... wonderful) I hung on for another month before I stopped talking to her completely...which was a shock to my system since we communicated in some form almost daily for five years. Too bad the economy blows... I used to be a highly paid consultant and workaholic. I could ignore everything else since I was really busy... and I'm used to filling my time (and the emptiness..ha ha) with work. Now I barely make 1/4 of what I did five years ago... and sadly I think that was part of the reason she wanted to go out with someone else. I try to reassure myself and this may sound like a boy scout platitute... "Do I really want to be with a LIAR?" and this exchange: Me: "it seems like you care about no one but yourself" her: "its my life" Sorry for the first post blathering... I know that "heartlessbitches.com" would stomp on my head and tell me to get over it already. Signed, Dead_Inside Link to post Share on other sites
bark Posted October 30, 2003 Share Posted October 30, 2003 Sounds like you got the old "one, two punch." First the girl dumps you, and then work takes a vacation. Life sucks. I ,too, was the other man, for 3 plus years, but my lady went back to her husband. (She had 2 small kids and we were geographically distant). My belief is that one usually only borrows another man's wife. But it was a great loan! Also, my work is light right now so I occasionally wallow. What is to be done? Time heals. It has been more than 6 months since we were last together and I no longer miss her (MUCH). Meanwhile, go out with friends, make new friends, reconnect with old friends. Fill that emotional hole she has left in your life. An affair is a relationship. Relationships end. The problem is that a party to an affair gets no sympathy when the affair ends. I sympathize with you, I've been there. Believe me, it eventually gets better. Link to post Share on other sites
Stangel311 Posted November 11, 2003 Share Posted November 11, 2003 Time is the great healer we always hear. I am a believer in that actually. I know that doesnt do much for the pain you are feeling now. Torture is the only word that comes to mind when I think of all the times I pretended to try to end it with my married lover. Mostly that is how I found this site. Looking for some people that have felt the things I am feeling and been thru what I see coming in my future. Link to post Share on other sites
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