painisgod Posted October 31, 2003 Share Posted October 31, 2003 so, I've made a big mistake and overcommitted my energy and time into someone who wasn't interested in me in the first place. Of course, she was perfectly happy to do wonderful things with me for six months, then cut me off without a word. This irritates me because of all the effort I put into establishing a friendship, then maintaining a physical relationship, all with no small amount of communication. To just CUT OFF SEX without discussing with your partner is the height of rudeness, in my opinion. Her reasons behind not having a lasting relationship are, as I understand it: 1) I havn't ever had a long term relationship, and 2) I'm younger than her (we both 23), as she prefers older, 'experienced' people who abuse/powertrip on her. Is this a bunch of bs or what? Sounds like 'blaming the victim' to me (term stolen from her). So I've been trying to keep a friendship going, but it seems like all I get is all her negativity with very little of that joy she is so capable of. Now I'm a support mechanism. What the hell? I go from a statue on a pedastal, to a beat-up doll to a cheerleader on the sidelines. I love this relationship thing, and I love her, but it's beginning to wear me down tremendously. help... thx : bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted October 31, 2003 Share Posted October 31, 2003 Believe it or not....a great deal of relationships end without the much needed "closure" which comes from a proper explanation of why the relationship has ended or changed. It becomes consuming because all you can do is sit around and ask yourself "What does it MEAN?"...and "WHY??". The bottom line is, somethimes there aren't any answers or the person avoids giving it to you because they are trying to spare your feelings or they are the type which avoid confrontation. A relationship takes TWO people. If one of them are ready to move on, whatever that reason may be, then the best thing is to let it go. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with YOU.....it just means the relationship isn't working anymore. I know moving on in hard....sometimes even unthinkable. But it's the only response you have available to you if she no longer wants a relationship with you in the same capacity it once was. You can't ever MAKE anyone love you, want you or need you....regardless of the past you shared. I'm sorry you are going thru this..... Arabess Link to post Share on other sites
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