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when is it ok to sleep with a new person?


sunnie23

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i'm finding myself very lost in the dating world.

 

i just met a guy who i am insanely atracted to. i lose my head when i'm around him but i'm very scared to act on my attraction-for a fear that he'll lose respect for me. i've never lusted for anyone like this before in my life...

 

he seems very interested in me, has called every day and we've hung out three times in the week we've known each other.

 

so, i'm curious, when is it ok to sleep with someone? i want to sooo bad, but i don't want to be deduced to f*** buddy status...

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I wouldn't have sex with a woman in a time period counted by weeks.

I'd also be turned off if she approached me for sex in such a short time.

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Originally posted by clia

Wait at least three months before clothing is removed.

Wow, Clia...really? That would be a loooong three months for me. I'm glad I'm married. :)

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Ah, but Cindy - remember the dreaded oxytocin! I figure it needs to be a controlled substance LOL. Last thing you need is to get that stuff messing with your brain just when you need to be making some good choices about whether a fellow is worth spending time with or not.

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weirdly, my physics 11 teacher (a dozen years ago) used this as an analogy to help us solve for initial velocity.

 

essentially: do you want to build up or {necessarily} slow down with this boy?

 

ok - a couple of factors. how old are you? what is your background in relationships? does this guy have potential?

 

i think the expectation of the three dates rule is pretty standard, which in no way indicates its correctness or lack thereof for you - this is obviously a place where you have to decide your own timeline. if you are unsure, which it sounds like you might be, err on the side of time and caution.

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Indeed.

 

No one can tell you when it's right. You'll know when it is.

 

Personally, I see nothing wrong with sleeping with someone after a day or a few days.

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