Author MrMayI Posted August 7, 2009 Author Share Posted August 7, 2009 MAYI, first off, if you don't take her out and follow Owls advice to the letter, I'm going to beat you upside the head with a 2X4!! This is an opportunity most of us would kill for. i promise to do my best if it actually does happen. i believe you t. i read the thread about you. while noble, you have officially hit real life badass status. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 i promise to do my best if it actually does happen. i believe you t. i read the thread about you. while noble, you have officially hit real life badass status. Sorry, I was gonna finish that post and got a phone call! total brain fart. :laugh: It didn't go down quite as smooth as she makes it sound, believe me. She has a way with words.:laugh: If i'm such a badass, Why did I let my little woman beat the crap out of me through all this! Shes making a move in your direction. Yes it's not ripping up the papers or jumping into your arms, but it's a step. If nothing else, you take her out and realize it's gone and you get some closure. If it isn't gone, then you've both taken a step closer. If it happens, take full advantage, a first date all over again. Knock her socks off. That way she knows what shes giving up. No guarantees, but at least your in the fight. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 7, 2009 Author Share Posted August 7, 2009 Sorry, I was gonna finish that post and got a phone call! total brain fart. :laugh: It didn't go down quite as smooth as she makes it sound, believe me. She has a way with words.:laugh: If i'm such a badass, Why did I let my little woman beat the crap out of me through all this! Shes making a move in your direction. Yes it's not ripping up the papers or jumping into your arms, but it's a step. If nothing else, you take her out and realize it's gone and you get some closure. If it isn't gone, then you've both taken a step closer. If it happens, take full advantage, a first date all over again. Knock her socks off. That way she knows what shes giving up. No guarantees, but at least your in the fight. TOJAZ whatever man. you beat a dude down for hitting a woman, and then gave him a personal trip to the hospital. then gave up a bitchin car to get her on her feet. no matter how smooth it didn't go, it's something to be commended in some shape or form. i agree with every word you say. honestly, i'm going to do my best. i just want her to see that i actually have more, still to this day, in common with her than anyone she has looked at in this town. if that leads to us being civil, and rebuilding our great friendship so be it. right now, i don't see her in a romantic sense either. however, it's possible it can come back. we'll see. i just want this woman in my life, and not just as my child's mother. she was my friend. if only i could just magically lift the fog from her eyes and make her see how great we had it. i never hit her, hardly ever, ever raised my voice, supported she and my daughter for 3 years while she was jobless, can fix anything that needs it (except this, of course ), cooked every meal we ate, cleaned up after all of us, just everything. i just want to start to piece the puzzle back together if i can. otherwise, i'm going over the fence, and onto the "greener" pasture myself, and i guarantee there are plenty of women out there that i can wow with my existence. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 7, 2009 Author Share Posted August 7, 2009 it's tough seeing her, to be honest. i've had to see her the past 2 days because of things for our daughter. she still looks very sleepless, and weathered. she seems to always have a chip on her shoulder. i've actually been very cordial and nice, but she just seems to not be all there. i can't help but wonder if the reality of it all is setting in on her. she would never tell me she ****ed up. never. she's a beautiful woman. however, she doesn't seem to be working too hard at keeping up appearances these days. if she's with one of these guys i sort of suspect she might, they missed out. it seems i maybe had her in her prime. she's still beautiful to me. just not in the "i want to be with you" respect. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 7, 2009 Author Share Posted August 7, 2009 each day gets shorter than the last, it seems. that's a good thing. the past few weeks seemed so damn long it just felt like one continuous neverending day. now, i'm starting to catch more sleep, gained some weight, gotten a good bit healthier. i really enjoy the gym. i'm glad for that as first tip for something to do. very beneficial. it's even improved my posture. we'll see about tomorrow night. the wife says she has no money (go figure). i don't know if that means she'll reject me saying i was paying anyway, or what. it really doesn't matter anymore. i feel the anger coming on again. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 each day gets shorter than the last, it seems. that's a good thing. the past few weeks seemed so damn long it just felt like one continuous neverending day. now, i'm starting to catch more sleep, gained some weight, gotten a good bit healthier. i really enjoy the gym. i'm glad for that as first tip for something to do. very beneficial. it's even improved my posture. we'll see about tomorrow night. the wife says she has no money (go figure). i don't know if that means she'll reject me saying i was paying anyway, or what. it really doesn't matter anymore. i feel the anger coming on again. Give the anger the night off MAYI. If she rejects you, so be it your no worse off then you were before. In all honesty, what do you have to lose? TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 Give the anger the night off MAYI. If she rejects you, so be it your no worse off then you were before. In all honesty, what do you have to lose? TOJAZ true. we're not going. in addition to that she was seen last night in public with the suspected OM. my source said it didn't look suspicious, it was their actions when they spoke to my wife. **** this ****. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 Sorry to hear that bud. Who called it off? Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 people seriously need to heed the words of the wiser members. i've kidded myself into believing nothing was going to shift the way it has, and alas here i am. i'm eerily somber about it. i feel i'm going to dramatically shift in a whole new direction. i want to pummel the OM, but i know that's not going to accomplish anything, and i love my daughter too damn much to let something like a cheating woman ruin my life. this stings really bad. i would never in a million years picture my wife even giving this guy a second glance. a step down? not sure. time to fry some fish and forget about this **** for a little while. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 Put the blame where it belongs man. OM (are you sure hes an OM now) is just filling a role, you wife is the one letting him do that. I'm not saying pummel her, but thats where the anger needs to be directed. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
LisaUk Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 MayI why aren't you going? Are you certain he is an OM for sure? Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 lisa and tojaz, it's weird but you two have become very good friends of mine. i'm not sure he's an OM and i needed someone to say that. however, my wife hasn't given me the time of day in 3 weeks, and i the same, but i haven't been parading around with someone i've spent countless hours texting and talking to on the phone. tojaz, she cancelled, because she says she has no money. i offered to pay, but she said it's not fair because she made it this way. i told her it's on the table, but i haven't heard from her today. oh well. suspected OM lives a block from my new house i've started moving things to. i hope this doesn't make for trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 lisa and tojaz, it's weird but you two have become very good friends of mine. i'm not sure he's an OM and i needed someone to say that. however, my wife hasn't given me the time of day in 3 weeks, and i the same, but i haven't been parading around with someone i've spent countless hours texting and talking to on the phone. tojaz, she cancelled, because she says she has no money. i offered to pay, but she said it's not fair because she made it this way. i told her it's on the table, but i haven't heard from her today. oh well. suspected OM lives a block from my new house i've started moving things to. i hope this doesn't make for trouble. It's not weird at all. I've become very close to a handful of people on LS, your definitely on the list bud. You, me, Lupa, Dela, oh and that british girl whats her name. Were all going through this together. Did you remind her that getting together was her idea? My suggestion would be to forgo the knock her socks off approach, because she obviously wants to go dutch and isn't flush with funds. Maybe some coffee or something else cheap, to just show her you can be cordial, still put on your best, maybe it will lead to a chance at a proper night out. As for suspected OM, it is what it is weather you know about it or not isn't going to help anything, it's just another thing to mess with your head. Focus on you and her, thats where your priority is. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 i'd like to say the possible OM doesn't bother me, but it does. especially now that i know i'll have to go several blocks out of my way just to avoid the possibility of seeing something i don't need to every day. as far as tonight goes, i've let the babysitter know i'll be home, so now i have no one to watch the kid, and don't want her there in case the **** hits the fan. i'm thinking it's time for me to just talk to my attorney again at the first of the week, and let her be served for court. i don't want to play the game, at all. if she doesn't have the dignity to tell me the truth, that she is at least interested in someone else, then she doesn't deserve a lick of my effort. tojaz, i have a very good friend i usually go visit in the fall in indiana. maybe i'll let you know when i'm going to be up that way. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 i'd like to say the possible OM doesn't bother me, but it does. especially now that i know i'll have to go several blocks out of my way just to avoid the possibility of seeing something i don't need to every day. as far as tonight goes, i've let the babysitter know i'll be home, so now i have no one to watch the kid, and don't want her there in case the **** hits the fan. i'm thinking it's time for me to just talk to my attorney again at the first of the week, and let her be served for court. i don't want to play the game, at all. if she doesn't have the dignity to tell me the truth, that she is at least interested in someone else, then she doesn't deserve a lick of my effort. tojaz, i have a very good friend i usually go visit in the fall in indiana. maybe i'll let you know when i'm going to be up that way. I'm not saying OM isn't going to bother you, I'm not that good of a lier, the fact that mine continues to breath kills me every day. I'm just saying don't waste energy on something you can't control. Where abouts in Indiana, I'm up by the lake. If you make it up here definitely let me know, I owe you a beer or three! TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 i go to lawrenceburg, and head into cincinnatti (sp) to visit another friend. i love to drive, though, Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 i go to lawrenceburg, and head into cincinnatti (sp) to visit another friend. i love to drive, though, http://www.mapquest.com/maps?city=Lawrenceburg&state=IN&country=US&latitude=39.090801&longitude=-84.849998&geocode=CITY Ouch, I'm in Valparaiso. Quite a ways for a cold one! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 8, 2009 Author Share Posted August 8, 2009 it's my vacation. i'll let you know. it probably won't be until october, anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 it's my vacation. i'll let you know. it probably won't be until october, anyway. Fair enough, you know where to find me! LOL TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 9, 2009 Author Share Posted August 9, 2009 well, last night i decided it's time to expose her just based on the little bit of information i have. i've told several of our mutual friends, and have pretty much scripted what i am going to tell her family when i call them this week. i'm also going to call my attorney in the morning and ask him to go ahead and serve the papers to her instead of asking her to just go sign them myself. this woman is too far gone for me to even try and imagine reconciliation or anything remotely close to it at this point. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 9, 2009 Share Posted August 9, 2009 well, last night i decided it's time to expose her just based on the little bit of information i have. i've told several of our mutual friends, and have pretty much scripted what i am going to tell her family when i call them this week. i'm also going to call my attorney in the morning and ask him to go ahead and serve the papers to her instead of asking her to just go sign them myself. this woman is too far gone for me to even try and imagine reconciliation or anything remotely close to it at this point. Tread lightly, wasn't too long a go you were on the get back together train! Go ahead and have her served, and expose the seperation. Watch it with accusations of OM! If it isn't what you think it is, your burning a pretty important bridge, have your suspicions but don't spread them until something concrete develops. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 9, 2009 Share Posted August 9, 2009 Yes, I freakin live on LS now, so don't bother pointing it out! Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted August 9, 2009 Share Posted August 9, 2009 It's about damn time MMI, it's evolve or die. You cannot be in limbo and she's still running around with this OM or whoever. I'm glad your gonna finally end it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted August 9, 2009 Author Share Posted August 9, 2009 It's about damn time MMI, it's evolve or die. You cannot be in limbo and she's still running around with this OM or whoever. I'm glad your gonna finally end it. it's true. we had yet another argument this morning, and she stated that she has wanted a divorce since i handed her papers. i told her it's a simple solution. i'll call my attorney in the morning, you go tomorrow, sign, pay your half of the filing fee, and it's done. she said she is going to. it's okay to love someone, but it's abundantly clear that my marriage is dead and gone. nothing i do from here on in will change that. she doesn't want to entertain any idea of reconciliation, and i don't want to be in limbo any longer. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 9, 2009 Share Posted August 9, 2009 it's true. we had yet another argument this morning, and she stated that she has wanted a divorce since i handed her papers. i told her it's a simple solution. i'll call my attorney in the morning, you go tomorrow, sign, pay your half of the filing fee, and it's done. she said she is going to. it's okay to love someone, but it's abundantly clear that my marriage is dead and gone. nothing i do from here on in will change that. she doesn't want to entertain any idea of reconciliation, and i don't want to be in limbo any longer. Sorry to hear that MayI, at least you know now. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
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