tojaz Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 Boooo green bay! Giants is the squad!!!! I'll Ignore that..... I would single handedly blow up her and his spot and ask lifelong friend huh? Why wasnt you invited to our wedding, how come I've never met you. That story is crap. I would ask how did you guys meet? He's the new or old OM bottom line you know it and I know it. Dont fall for his crap next time you see him give him the stink eye and tell the ex until the divorce is finalized no members of the opposite sex is allowed in the house while she has visitation with DD! and you will get a court order! .... because I totally agree with this. MayI you have every right to know who this guy is if hes spending ANY time with your DD. Hell, thats some great big brass ones just to come to your house. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 13, 2009 Author Share Posted September 13, 2009 i should mention that he really is a friend of hers. she grew up with him. he has recently moved about 4 hours away with his lady and their parents. i knew the background 5 years ago. believe me when i say, no one would've left this house with my DD had i not had knowledge. edit: for the record chrome, we got married in vegas. no one was there but some of the in-laws. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 13, 2009 Author Share Posted September 13, 2009 honestly, i don't care if he's an OM or not. i don't want my daughter involved in that **** right now. edit: he also said i'm sorry to be meeting you finally under the circumstances. Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 i should mention that he really is a friend of hers. she grew up with him. he has recently moved about 4 hours away with his lady and their parents. i knew the background 5 years ago. believe me when i say, no one would've left this house with my DD had i not had knowledge. edit: for the record chrome, we got married in vegas. no one was there but some of the in-laws. Oh ok so you do know him... And if he's in a relationship with someone why is he there with your wife???? Why does he have to be there when she picks up your daughter she couldnt do it on her own. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 13, 2009 Author Share Posted September 13, 2009 Oh ok so you do know him... And if he's in a relationship with someone why is he there with your wife???? Why does he have to be there when she picks up your daughter she couldnt do it on her own. now, there's my problem too. there wasn't a reason for him to come to my house. i know OF him. never physically met him before today. i'd like to know the story of why his lady isn't here. no way was i causing a ruckus in front of my kid today. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 Tough call MayI, When you say his "lady" is that W or GF?? Even if he is a friend, you have a right to know for your daughters sake. My ex's OM was "just a good friend" as well, until i dug deeper. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 13, 2009 Author Share Posted September 13, 2009 Tough call MayI, When you say his "lady" is that W or GF?? Even if he is a friend, you have a right to know for your daughters sake. My ex's OM was "just a good friend" as well, until i dug deeper. TOJAZ it is a tough call. i don't want to look like a jealous person, because i honestly do not care what she does on her time, but on my daughter's time, i think it's totally wrong for another man to be involved. the ****ing ink isn't even dry on our papers. i wish for once she would think about her daughter, and how this may effect her. her idea of family is mommy, daddy and herself. **** man. i'm losing my cool. Link to post Share on other sites
PWSX3 Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 :bunny::bunny:FOOTBALL!!!!:bunny: Packers/Bears tomorrow!!! GO PACK GO!!! Gonna have two TV's going, playing Madden right now LOL GO VIKINGS!!!! I'm not sure how we got talked into taking your old quarterback tojaz.. Sure he was good in his younger days, but someone please tell him he is to old... Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted September 13, 2009 Share Posted September 13, 2009 it is a tough call. i don't want to look like a jealous person, because i honestly do not care what she does on her time, but on my daughter's time, i think it's totally wrong for another man to be involved. the ****ing ink isn't even dry on our papers. i wish for once she would think about her daughter, and how this may effect her. her idea of family is mommy, daddy and herself. **** man. i'm losing my cool. Keep your cool bro, you don't even know for sure what the situation is. While I'm not suggesting grilling her for information, an innocent conversation with your daughter could shed some light on the situation, as long as it isn;t harmful to her. Kids pay attention and like to talk. GO VIKINGS!!!! I'm not sure how we got talked into taking your old quarterback tojaz.. Sure he was good in his younger days, but someone please tell him he is to old... Agreed, Huge Favre fan, but would have preferred he ride off into the sunset then all the circus antics. I was at Lambeau when the Jets trade happened, thought there was going to be a riot!!! LOL Still, old or not I think one more year with the pack would have given him another SB appearance, but we'll never know. He didn't look to shabby today though. TOJAZ TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 13, 2009 Author Share Posted September 13, 2009 Keep your cool bro, you don't even know for sure what the situation is. While I'm not suggesting grilling her for information, an innocent conversation with your daughter could shed some light on the situation, as long as it isn;t harmful to her. Kids pay attention and like to talk. TOJAZ TOJAZ it's alright now. i decided to call and tell her no offense, but it's not cool for our kid to be there with someone of opposite sex spend the night. i told her that goes for either of us. she told me he left, but she does agree with me. we actually had a nice over 5 minute convo. this ****'s crazy. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 it's alright now. i decided to call and tell her no offense, but it's not cool for our kid to be there with someone of opposite sex spend the night. i told her that goes for either of us. she told me he left, but she does agree with me. we actually had a nice over 5 minute convo. this ****'s crazy. Glad to hear she was able to put your DD first and agree with you. maybe shes getting some priorities in order, I hope so for your daughters sake. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
soheartbroken Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Ok. I give up. What does DD stand for? I assume it means daughter, but what's the first 'D'? Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Ok. I give up. What does DD stand for? I assume it means daughter, but what's the first 'D'? Dear Daughter Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 Dear Daughter and in my case, it's utterly true. she's the dearest thing in the world to me. why oh why do i have an ex-wife? jesus christmas. Link to post Share on other sites
Chrome Barracuda Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 and in my case, it's utterly true. she's the dearest thing in the world to me. why oh why do i have an ex-wife? jesus christmas. Because it was her choice to be divorced from you. You did everything you could, stop blaiming yourself and get back on that horse!!! lol. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 and in my case, it's utterly true. she's the dearest thing in the world to me. why oh why do i have an ex-wife? jesus christmas. She is a darling too MayI as for why you have an ex-wife??, same as me. She let you down!!:( TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 She is a darling too MayI as for why you have an ex-wife??, same as me. She let you down!!:( TOJAZ i know she did. i often wonder if i'll be kicking myself forever for the ways i let her down withing the marriage. i know i haven't stopped since this all began. i STILL can't help but miss the memories. i talked to the girl i was with for almost 2 years before my wife and i met on the phone last night. we live several hours away from each other, and that will likely be the last convo for a while. she made me feel so much better about myself. she told me that our ending was mostly her fault, and that i'm the greatest guy she ever dated. Link to post Share on other sites
lupa Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 i know she did. i often wonder if i'll be kicking myself forever for the ways i let her down withing the marriage. i know i haven't stopped since this all began. i STILL can't help but miss the memories. i talked to the girl i was with for almost 2 years before my wife and i met on the phone last night. we live several hours away from each other, and that will likely be the last convo for a while. she made me feel so much better about myself. she told me that our ending was mostly her fault, and that i'm the greatest guy she ever dated. I'm going to make a suggestion that most here will probably disagree with... ...go visit her, even if it is just to hang out and have coffee. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 I'm going to make a suggestion that most here will probably disagree with... ...go visit her, even if it is just to hang out and have coffee. i'll be in her area 3rd week of october. we were fire and ice, man. it was the easiest decision i ever made to walk away from her. however, our friendship was solid, always. we were friends for a couple of years before we got together. we were briefly engaged, and the ex-wife made fun of it for months when we first got married. it always pissed me off, but i never showed it. the girl is smoking hot. Link to post Share on other sites
lupa Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 i'll be in her area 3rd week of october. we were fire and ice, man. it was the easiest decision i ever made to walk away from her. however, our friendship was solid, always. we were friends for a couple of years before we got together. we were briefly engaged, and the ex-wife made fun of it for months when we first got married. it always pissed me off, but i never showed it. the girl is smoking hot. Then allow me to suggest crazy monkey sex for a weekend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 Then allow me to suggest crazy monkey sex for a weekend. in all honesty, this is likely what'll happen if my daughter's not around. i really don't want it to happen. she'll be clung right back to me. we've been apart over 7 years, and yet she still has sought me out. she didn't even know the ex and i were history. she said something told her to contact me. Link to post Share on other sites
lupa Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Well, I think the only way to handle something like that would be to be honest. "I want to have crazy monkey sex with you, just like old times, but for right now especially in light of what I'm going through, it cannot mean much more than two people having epic crazy monkey sex." All this game playing people do just complicates things...at least I'm trying to be honest and (mostly) direct with the new girlfriend about a lot of things. It certainly takes a lot of the mystery out, but at the same time i think we both know where we stand. ...or i could be completely wrong about things, what the hell do I know, I thought marriage was forever. Doh. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 as did i, lupa, but we didn't walk on it, so it's okay to still believe marriage is forever. i told the old fiancee last night all about the present divorce situation, my little girl and how dear she is to me, all that. she also knew my ex wife and told me that she didn't think we would've made it as far as we did. she said she listened to the ex wife's ex from before me speak of how deceitful she was in their relationship, and how she seemed to not care one bit what he ever felt or even thought. sounds very familiar. these 2 women are night and day. the ex wife is very nice to your face, but as i've learned will drive and twist the knife as deep as she can get it into your back. the ex fiancee is explosive, sometimes seemingly crazy. i truly loved her though. i just couldn't see a future with her. my ex wife, however, it only took that first look where i actually felt us entwine that i knew it could be forever. i can't help it. i miss her. i want that feeling back. i know it's not going to happen. still. i can't help myself. i am feeling that i may always want to be with her. good or bad. right or wrong. **** me. Link to post Share on other sites
lupa Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 i can't help it. i miss her. i want that feeling back. i know it's not going to happen. still. i can't help myself. i am feeling that i may always want to be with her. good or bad. right or wrong. **** me. Me too, man, me too. I woke up this morning next to a woman that told me she loves me, and I smiled when I saw her. we cuddle, I got up, got ready for work, she got up, got ready to head back to her place...it was a nice morning, everything was great, and then I found myself missing my marriage once I got to the office. So, I spent the morning on here, reading, posting, generally feeling low. I don't think our hearts will ever fully get over this, man, but I think we can just try to get better for it, and over time grow. Maybe your explosive ex is also loyal and true! Maybe there is a passion there that now you, having been through so much and having learned so much, can temper and handle! That is where I am now, I think (I hope)...I think I am ready for my past, explosive relationship. I think I understand a little better how to understand her, what she feels, how to communicate. Or at least now I know that I have to try. I'm not telling you what to do besides not shutting it out. Don't discount it before you have explored...even if it is just on a high level. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrMayI Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 i decided last night that i never want to lose contact with this girl again. i mean, i know i did the right thing breaking the engagement with her. i also know in 7 years she is still single, no children, and seemingly interested in my well being. i need to hear it from someone like her. i need someone who's known me intimately to shoot straight and tell me what i was to them. she told me i was trustworthy. she told me when i was angry she knew to stay the hell out of my way. that i was nothing near to controlling or abusive, and for the stbx to say so is preposterous. just made me feel good. she didn't have to see my marriage. she watched me date several girls before we got together. she watched me walk away and start seeing my stbx 6 months later. i don't want the physical aspect back with her. i do believe i could handle the explosiveness now, but my daughter could not. i feel like the hole inside of me is growing by the minute today. Link to post Share on other sites
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