D-Lish Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 Conversely- if I met a guy that refused to wear a condom and admitted he never does... I'd be so worried about what he'd been exposed to. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 Just to be clear, I am not standing on a sanctimonious soap box here. It is just by the grace of God (or whatever) that I've never gotten the herp. Because believe me, I have been STUPID in that regard. I've seen close friends - beautiful, smart women end up with the lifetime sentence of that (which, really, is minor when you think about the worst that can happen). And let me tell you, it's not because they did something I didn't do. Pure dumb luck on my part - back then. Well, the Herp is skin to skin contact- condoms help, but it can still be spread with them. Same with warts- all sex (even protected) is much more high risk. I couldn't imagine having unprotected sex in this day and age! Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 mhmm....he can't help how he was raised. It comes out in comments like these, how he really feels about women. I've found that a lot of men talk that kind of talk in front of other men (I call it The Peacock Syndrome)... but underneath they're pure mush for the women they dig. I'm hoping that's true in Alpha's case. From his posts here, he behaved like a true gentleman during their date, and describes their previous phone calls as sending him into the stratosphere. And he's going SHOPPING with her on their next date!! This behavior is not consistent with a man who hates women. (I hope I'm right, I hope I'm right...) Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 Well, the Herp is skin to skin contact- condoms help, but it can still be spread with them. Same with warts- all sex (even protected) is much more high risk. I couldn't imagine having unprotected sex in this day and age! It is my understanding that if he performs oral sex on her and she has herpes ( or other certain STD;s ) that it can spread to his mouth and mucous membranes. If he winkie comes in contact with her kitty kitty then he can get the herp or other various diseases .. I dont think its worth the risk unless she is a virgin ?? If she is then you are in uncharted, unclaimed terrority, Something tells me she's not a virgin .... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 This behavior is not consistent with a man who hates women. I would agree. IME, men who act such as is being presented here love women and the pleasures women bring to them. The variable is whether they respect women. I've seen both sides of that fence. IMO, a man who kisses and tells (publicly, not here on an anonymous forum) is starting to see splinters on the negative side of the fence, simply because the people he tells look that woman in the eye and have the upper hand with her. They know things about her, generally private things. I doubt that is happening here, and like you, hope his intentions are honorable. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted July 17, 2009 Author Share Posted July 17, 2009 This behavior is not consistent with a man who hates women....) who ever said i hated women?!? Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 who ever said i hated women?!? I know I never thought you hated them but you did have antiquated views on where their place should be... I also think you sounded a bit cynical at times about women /dating/who cleans the house /who's in charge/just general stuff that I thought was retired with the dinosaurs... Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted July 17, 2009 Author Share Posted July 17, 2009 anyways so we're meeting in 1.5 hrs at oak brook mall. apparently nordstroms is having a big sale starting today so i'm going shoes shopping with Susan. maybe i can get her to buy some of those stripper shoes would nordstorms carry those? probably not Link to post Share on other sites
gopher Posted July 17, 2009 Share Posted July 17, 2009 anyways so we're meeting in 1.5 hrs at oak brook mall. apparently nordstroms is having a big sale starting today so i'm going shoes shopping with Susan. maybe i can get her to buy some of those stripper shoes would nordstorms carry those? probably not LOL Alpha, I live about 30 minutes from there.... Good luck tonight!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted July 18, 2009 Author Share Posted July 18, 2009 well the date was ok. no booze. she was sort of quiet. we went shoes shopping for her and i looked around but didn't buy anything for myself. we had dinner at California Pizza Kitchen. I was sort of bored really. She stated she "had fun" but she wasn't the animal she was the last date when she was schnockered. It was ok i guess, i'd give the date a C+ at best. I think i'm going to have to keep looking around. It was our third date and now i'm starting to second-guess myself. I think she may be too conservative for me. Right now I don't even know if i'll call her again. Maybe i'll change my mind in a day or two. Who knows? Link to post Share on other sites
boogieboy Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Oh noooo! This one sounded like it had so much potential. Maybe go on a few more dates and make sure shes drinking so you can have fun until you meet the next one? Link to post Share on other sites
Author alphamale Posted July 18, 2009 Author Share Posted July 18, 2009 Oh noooo! This one sounded like it had so much potential. Maybe go on a few more dates and make sure shes drinking so you can have fun until you meet the next one? we'll see. the first and second dates were great but this one was sort of boring for me at least. i don't know Link to post Share on other sites
gopher Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 I don't know man, it seems like you need or crave the chaos of the last two dates. This one was so normal, that it didn't do anything for you...I'd think pretty hard before not seeing her again. Just my two cents. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 I think without her all liquored up the fun sags....When she's wasted she is all over you. This is what she is like sober....boring ...maybe ? There's only one way to find out what someone is really like and thats to spend time with them. You either draw closer on dates or you say wtf this is not what I thought it would be. I think the next date minus the liquor will probrobly be even be more boring. Seems she was bored too... Link to post Share on other sites
v g Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 we'll see. the first and second dates were great but this one was sort of boring for me at least. i don't know Of course it was boring. You went with her while she shopped for shoes. That sounds about as entertaining as going with her to the DMV while she renews her license. Perhaps ask her out again and actually do something fun. Have a light meal and go to a dance class. You'll both get your blood pumping, sweat a little, have a great time, and perhaps reignite that connection/romance you had both experienced previously. Plus you can see if she's a total dud when sober. Link to post Share on other sites
dropdeadlegs Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 I would have to agree that shopping was not the best "date" for either of you. I adore my BF (same one I've always had while here) but I do not like shopping with him at all. Even if we are shopping specifically for him it's not much fun for either of us. Maybe give her another shot doing something more date oriented? Just one more? that kind of first impression shouldn't be squandered on a boring shopping date. Chicago must have great things to offer that would interest both of you. We all have "dud" dates with previously exhilarating people. Did you just shop and eat and leave it at that? I'm wondering why you both chose that day and that activity. Was it the only option this weekend due to previous time constraints? Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Of course it was boring. You went with her while she shopped for shoes. That sounds about as entertaining as going with her to the DMV while she renews her license. Nah, if they really liked each other they'd have fun no matter what. It seems like they can only have fun when they are making out and getting drunk. I'd say 1/10 chances for this to work out. Link to post Share on other sites
v g Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Nah, if they really liked each other they'd have fun no matter what. Perhaps, but after their previous date I'll bet they were both feeling awkward and uncomfortable. 'I'll take this shoe in a size 5' does not sound like a breaking-the-ice activity. It seems like they can only have fun when they are making out and getting drunk. I think it's possible that they can have fun doing something other than drinking. Only one way to find out. Perhaps she won't need liquid courage to relax around Alphamale if she's doing something fun. This may even be true for Alphamale. Hmm. Just a thought. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 they were both feeling awkward and uncomfortable Perhaps she won't need liquid courage to relax Just a thought. I see..... Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Although going shopping is a killer, I agree with Ariadne, if they really were into one another, even that would be fun. Just being together doing anything would be enough. That said, however, I think you should try it one more time at least Alpha. Now, if having a drink or two (not getting sloshed I mean) loosens her up a bit, I see nothing wrong with it. Personally, I always have a couple of drinks when I go out on a date. It´s part of the fun of going out in the evenings. I mean why go to a bar or restaurant to sip coke? Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Nah, if they really liked each other they'd have fun no matter what. It seems like they can only have fun when they are making out and getting drunk. I'd say 1/10 chances for this to work out. I have to agree with this. When getting to know my bf ,I LOVED everything we did , from going into Radioshack to get cell batteries to seducing him in Walmart getting groceries. From breakfast in a old diner ...to walking on the beach. I think its a BIG indicator of what kind of concrete foundation they both have. But as I stated they have no foundation yet. They build it strong by getting to know eachother and cut back on the panting and erections , lol... I have to emphasize. Lets imagine that first or second date they both got snockered and had sex. Okay now what ? Having good sex is great but I think MANY relationships ( new ones ) FAIL because other than "GOD your sooooo hot I wanna do ya."...what else do those folks have ? Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 I have to emphasize. Lets imagine that first or second date they both got snockered and had sex. Okay now what ? Having good sex is great but I think MANY relationships ( new ones ) FAIL because other than "GOD your sooooo hot I wanna do ya."...what else do those folks have ? Well, of course, the absolute best would be to have both...a great connection in and out of bed! Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Hunmm... a 'shoe' date.. I don't think I would ever do that.. I absolutely loooove shopping (it's my favourite passtime, well almost favourite )... but I like it 'alone'... Maybe she felt that you were 'bored' then it made her uncomfortable.. it's hard to say.. we weren't there.. but since most men hate shopping, I don't think I would do it for a date. Next time, take her to a movie, concert, museum.. NO alcohol... just to see if you're still compatible. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 I guess the operative thing her is alpha's perspective. Did he go on a shopping date because he 'had' to, or does he like doing that kind of stuff. Me, I love it. Handling fabrics, dressing a woman, trying on shoes (handling her feet). As an advocate of leaving something to the imagination, it's heaven. Then there's jewelry The key is being with a woman who is open to that. Lizzie and some others here would not be. That's OK. Alpha needs to be his natural self. Don't 'act'. Ask her on a date to do something you enjoy and think she'll enjoy. Share your passion. See how it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted July 18, 2009 Share Posted July 18, 2009 Well, of course, the absolute best would be to have both...a great connection in and out of bed! Agreee ! Agreee Link to post Share on other sites
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