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way_2_tired

Do you think it is bad to only want a serious relationship (marriage possibility) with someone of equal education level?

 

Disclaimer: I have plenty of friends less educated then myself and do not think less of anyone for being uneducated. I am also very aware that there are many intelligent people who don't have a lot of formal education.

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I don't see anything wrong in wanting to be with someone with equal education level.

 

For me, I prefer to be with someone more educated than I am so that I can learn more from him. I believe that I have so much more to learn even though I have a solid educational background.

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I don't think it's bad. For me personally, having an equal degree to me is one of the first things I look for. It's not a deal breaker, but it's for sure a big check for me.

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You'reasian

Equivalent education is nice, but not a necessity.

 

There's different kinds of smarts: academics (book smarts), emotional intelligence (people smarts), and situational intellgence (street smarts). Everyone has a different mix, that's what makes your gf unique.

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I am also very aware that there are many intelligent people who don't have a lot of formal education.

 

Bingo. I would want someone of an equal intelligence level so when we are not having hot monkey sex, we can have meaningful conversations about things. :D

 

IMO, anyone can get a degree these days, and I've met some really stupid Lawyers and PhD's

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I used to be a stickler for an educated guy, but now I'm dating a guy who didn't graduate from college, but he's just as smart as all my other friends.

 

Just depends on the person's intelligence level!

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GoodOnPaper
Do you think it is bad to only want a serious relationship (marriage possibility) with someone of equal education level?

 

No. Although, the way you phrase this, I wonder if you think you wouldn't necessarily be as attracted to someone of equal education level.

 

It surprises me that people stress so much about education level -- their own and their potential partners'. For me, getting a PhD was a piece of cake, but I could never figure out how to attract women. I probably would have done far better with women by going into a blue-collar vocation right after high school.

 

This is very good:

 

There's different kinds of smarts: academics (book smarts)' date=' emotional intelligence (people smarts), and situational intellgence (street smarts). Everyone has a different mix[/quote']

 

I'm a natural-born academic but emotionally, I still feel like the geeky teenager who can't quite figure things out with girls. My wife -- yes, I still ended up married -- only has a BS degree but is VERY sharp emotionally.

 

All-in-all, I don't think compatibility necessarily follows formal education alignment

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book smarts are one thing. but there's something to be said of being street smart.

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Queen of Hearts
book smarts are one thing. but there's something to be said of being street smart.

 

I think the gentle blend of both is what there is something to be said about. Not having any book smarts makes for a thug who can't spell and that's just gross.

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Queen of Hearts
My wife -- yes, I still ended up married -- only has a BS degree but is VERY sharp emotionally.

 

Is amazed at the "only" written into this sentence. A 2000 census of the American population states that 15.5% had earned a bachelor's degree. That is not that many, so, "only"....wow. I know you have your PhD, and academia is your realm, but it's not like that for everyone.

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Queen of Hearts
Do you think it is bad to only want a serious relationship (marriage possibility) with someone of equal education level?

 

I am almost done with my Masters of Science. I am currently not looking, however, I don't know that I would make it a requirement that the person I decided to be with be on the exact same level.

 

For me, it is the blend of smarts that I need that You'reasian posted about. I would prefer to be with someone that was well able to handle academics (even if they are not formally educated, one can read and teach themselves), as well as emotions and situations as they all are important aspect of life.

 

Going off of formal education alone is entirely one dimesional. You want a blend of all aspects of smarts.

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Trialbyfire
Do you think it is bad to only want a serious relationship (marriage possibility) with someone of equal education level?

 

Disclaimer: I have plenty of friends less educated then myself and do not think less of anyone for being uneducated. I am also very aware that there are many intelligent people who don't have a lot of formal education.

Is it bad? That's up to you to decide.

 

I value education, combined with many other traits, including being grounded in reality. Someone lost in academia, where they can't function in the real world, is not attractive, IMO and IME.

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A blend is the best thing. I have more emotional and street smarts, but I work hard for my academic goals. I'm earning my PhD the hard way, but to me its worth it.

 

Someone lost in academia, where they can't function in the real world, is not attractive, IMO and IME.

 

And I can say from experience that academic smarts are nice in a person, but if that's all they have going for them they start to appear 2 dimensional. My ex was an air traffic controller but he would always say something rude or embarrassing to the point he had no friends, or he would be taken advantage easily because he had no emotional or street smarts. (not the reason we broke up though..heh heh)

 

Honestly the people with layers are the best in my opinion.

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GoodOnPaper
Is amazed at the "only" written into this sentence. A 2000 census of the American population states that 15.5% had earned a bachelor's degree. That is not that many, so, "only"....wow. I know you have your PhD, and academia is your realm, but it's not like that for everyone.

 

I wasn't trying to disparage my wife -- just pointing out that my natural academic smarts were a huge disadvantage in dating/relationships.

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GoodOnPaper
Someone lost in academia, where they can't function in the real world, is not attractive, IMO and IME.

 

Interesting perspective -- business/finance person, by chance?

 

In the sciences, anyway, academia doesn't often equal lost. In my case, it was practically a calling and I do very well -- great teaching record and the most research grant money in the history of my institution.

 

Again, though, this type of talent was at best useless and likely detrimental in dating/relationships. I would say that a master's degree maximizes the social benefits of formal education. With a PhD, it's easy for people to assume that you are geeky and out of touch with the real world.

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