moo Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 You stupid, disgusting, nasty, sad sack of filth. You pus-faced lump of trash. You are the most vile, revolting, repugnant piece of monkey poop. You are nasty, dirty. You sir, are not a gentleman. You are a soda guzzling bastard. You have sores all over you personality and your face looks like someone threw up on it. You are a giant hemorrhoid lodged in the butt crack of life. You are the most putrid thing to ever walk the earth. You were not born out of the womb. You came out of a butt crack and fell on the operating table. The doctor slapped your face because it was so ugly and stamped "BIO HAZARD" on your forehead. "Made in China" is engraved on your butt, you fake moron. You are not human. You are the nastiest thing I have ever laid eyes on. Stay out of my life, fungus-face. Go away, back to the tar pits where belong. Now you must deal with the wrath of MOO! Link to post Share on other sites
marlena Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Hmmmm! Must say that was an impressive piece of descriptive writing! Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Hmmmm! Must say that was an impressive piece of descriptive writing! Hmmmm....and here I was thinking "psychotic" where you think impressive... Reality anyone????? Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 :lmao: Wicked post. This guy must have done something REALLY icky! Link to post Share on other sites
stuckinoz Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Alrighteythen - Care to elaborate any further? Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 "Your grayish mottled flesh is riddled with postules from people repeatedly touching you with 11-foot poles". Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 "Your grayish mottled flesh is riddled with postules from people repeatedly touching you with 11-foot poles". Gotta say, my FAVORITE lines were, "You sir, are not a gentleman. You are a soda guzzling bastard." I actually laughed out loud - what a great way to start the day!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Gotta say, my FAVORITE lines were, "You sir, are not a gentleman. You are a soda guzzling bastard." I actually laughed out loud - what a great way to start the day!!! Yes! I can't say which is my favourite... I just love the OP. Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Yes! I can't say which is my favourite... I just love the OP. Hey, OP, do you mind if I steal those lines the next time some "dude" makes me mad?? (I'm thinking maybe my boss??) "You, sir, are no gentleman! You are a water (he doesn't drink sodas) guzzling bastard!" Or does it lose something in the translation? Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 I think "soda" would be the better word, regardless of the fact that boss doesn't swill it – the imagery is strong. I see someone swilling a sugar-laden drink that has no nutritional value whatsoever and is cheap (as in, will only pay for cheap sugary drinks than a cocktail or beer) ... and it just sounds FUNNY. like you, this is my favorite line in the post too. kudos, OP. I think I'm a little bit in love. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Hey.. My ex Wife found LS Gosh I miss her rants directed at me... Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Hey.. My ex Wife found LS Gosh I miss her rants directed at me... LMAO!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 I think "soda" would be the better word, regardless of the fact that boss doesn't swill it – the imagery is strong. I see someone swilling a sugar-laden drink that has no nutritional value whatsoever and is cheap (as in, will only pay for cheap sugary drinks than a cocktail or beer) ... and it just sounds FUNNY. like you, this is my favorite line in the post too. kudos, OP. I think I'm a little bit in love. Yeah, Quan, I'm thinkin' you're right - "water" just doesn't have the same effect, does it? Darn...the only problem with verbatim quoting is the idiot would probably look at me & say something like, "but I don't drink soda." The remainder of it would undoubtedly just ZOOM right over his head. Link to post Share on other sites
redtail Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 You stupid, disgusting, nasty, etc, etc, etc... Asked for a blow job again? The swine... Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Asked for a blow job again? The swine... I have to say - this is the most entertaining morning I've had in a while! Link to post Share on other sites
stuckinoz Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 :lmao:That's all I got to say bout that :lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Yeah, Quan, I'm thinkin' you're right - "water" just doesn't have the same effect, does it? Darn...the only problem with verbatim quoting is the idiot would probably look at me & say something like, "but I don't drink soda." The remainder of it would undoubtedly just ZOOM right over his head. I can actually picture the look on his face. Yeah, then "soda" wouldn't probably work but like Quankanne said, it wouldn't have had the same effect! Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 I can actually picture the look on his face. Yeah, then "soda" wouldn't probably work but like Quankanne said, it wouldn't have had the same effect! Have you ever seen Jeff Dunham (ventriloquist who is HILARIOUS)? He has a character named Peanut & I picture my boss looking like Peanut when he does the "zoom" thing over his head! Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Have you ever seen Jeff Dunham (ventriloquist who is HILARIOUS)? He has a character named Peanut & I picture my boss looking like Peanut when he does the "zoom" thing over his head! Yes! I love him - he's cute . "I KILLLL YOUUU!!" . OMG - I'm literally :lmao:@ your boss doing the zoom thing! Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Yes! I love him - he's cute . "I KILLLL YOUUU!!" . OMG - I'm literally :lmao:@ your boss doing the zoom thing! Boss' name is Steve...makes me want to say sometimes, "So, am I p*ssing you off, Steve-vuh-vuh?!":laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
Lyssa Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Boss' name is Steve...makes me want to say sometimes, "So, am I p*ssing you off, Steve-vuh-vuh?!":laugh: Hilarious!! I'm still curious about the OP - wonder what that dude did! Link to post Share on other sites
Jilly Bean Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 I'm impressed she was able to spew such venom without using one expletive. Now THAT'S literary talent. Link to post Share on other sites
Reggie Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Damn, I spilled my Coke(I'm sipping, not guzzling, BTW.) Nice vent. Hope the Chinese were not offended, though. Link to post Share on other sites
HsMomma Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 Damn, I spilled my Coke(I'm sipping, not guzzling, BTW.) Nice vent. Hope the Chinese were not offended, though. Yes, Reggie - sip ONLY - you don't want to be a "soda guzzling" b*stard...and a "soda sipping b*stard" just doesn't hold the same punch! Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted July 1, 2009 Share Posted July 1, 2009 SILENCE! I KILL YOU!!!! I love jeff dunham ... Link to post Share on other sites
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