donna29 Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Hi All. I have just 3 weeks back discovered that my partner of 10yrs had been living a double life for almost 4 yrs with someone else.... I have been with him all u adult life so far, im 29 and feel like my world has been completely ripped away from me.... Having a job where he works really unsociable hours he was telling me we needed the money so he was doing lots of overtime, he was acting strange the one night and something or someone told me in my head if i looked in the wardrobe in a coat pocket i would find the evidence of him playing away...sure enough there it was i felt instantly sick.....full of messages from someone else..i eventually got her to talk to me and she said she had been with him almost 4 yrs...OMG i so wished the ground would have opened up and swallowed me.... he also did it when r little boy was 16 months old for 6 months, we did eventually work through it and it took me 5 yrs to erase this....then i get this bombshell, he was literllay living a double life.....i was such a fool i blame me for letting it happen..... Im 29 and hes the same age our son is 7 now and twicw he has done this now and twice the women were doube his age...im discusted but at the same time my heart has been broken again...im so not strong and don't know how to cope with this I'm a mess......now he keeps saying ive changed Ive changed but how can he......im absolutely gutted.... thanks for reading Donna xx Link to post Share on other sites
Author donna29 Posted July 19, 2009 Author Share Posted July 19, 2009 Amongst all this theres still my boy to take care of....i have a realy good famiy but its the thoughts in my head....all the days he said he was working he was there with her whilst i was at r home taking care of r son.... all i have done is cry today i cant get the pictures out my head.... i think im going mad...10yrs is a ong time and i loved him so much he was my life and now its all gone.....how could i even contepate having a cheat bk whos cheated over half of my babys little life....... Aso found out he referred to me as the bitch....but now hes sorri omg sorri dosent cut it.... Link to post Share on other sites
shutterbugg Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Donna, I'm so sorry. I know exactly what you're going through. I was married for nearly 17 years to someone who cheated on and off. I caught him before we had kids (said he was sorry and wouldn't do it again), caught him again one week (!) after our second child was born, and then again a few years later. I was tired of checking his wallet, cell phone, and the history on the computer. The last time I caught him, I kicked him out. It was the best thing I ever did. After our divorce he got involved with another girl and I found out he was cheating on her too! A few men actually do mean it when they say they'll change their ways, but for the most part, once a cheater always a cheater. Don't put up with it! Link to post Share on other sites
shutterbugg Posted July 19, 2009 Share Posted July 19, 2009 Oh, and don't worry about being called "the bitch". I was referred to as "the money grubbing whore" when he found out how much he was required to pay in child support. As if that were my fault---they use calculators to figure that stuff out retard!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted July 20, 2009 Share Posted July 20, 2009 Amongst all this theres still my boy to take care of....i have a realy good famiy but its the thoughts in my head....all the days he said he was working he was there with her whilst i was at r home taking care of r son.... all i have done is cry today i cant get the pictures out my head.... i think im going mad...10yrs is a ong time and i loved him so much he was my life and now its all gone.....how could i even contepate having a cheat bk whos cheated over half of my babys little life....... Aso found out he referred to me as the bitch....but now hes sorri omg sorri dosent cut it.... Drop the Stupid Bastard! And get full custody and make sure he pay pay pays! Contact a good Lawyer, Girl. Get that child support NOW and FAST! If he got another woman pregers, you better move your little ass and get that child support first, because the courts will award child support to who ever files first! So get a move on! You'll do alot better without that scum in your life, better to find out now at 29 while you're young and Hot:love:, than when you're say 40, or worse 50! Just make sure he doesn't sweet talk you into staying, and working things out! Link to post Share on other sites
MagicMan08 Posted July 20, 2009 Share Posted July 20, 2009 what a jerk. i couldn't live with myself. but i am not a good liar either Link to post Share on other sites
jojojones Posted July 21, 2009 Share Posted July 21, 2009 Guys like this make me sick. There is NO excuse. The BEST excuse in the WORLD would only get you out of it once. He's had the audacity to do it again and again. But there's some great news for you: He won't be hurting you anymore. You have now removed a big chunk of sh*t from your life and are free to get out there and find real love and support and companionship. Ironically, you are in great shape! Link to post Share on other sites
Author donna29 Posted July 23, 2009 Author Share Posted July 23, 2009 Thanks a for the comments, naturally he is trying the sweet taking crap and right now im pretty confused....... He keeps saying it was a mistake but how can 3 yrs be a mistake a double life i ask you.....im living alone with my son at the moment hes gone.....Grrrrrrr life a bummer sometimes... Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 Thanks a for the comments, naturally he is trying the sweet taking crap and right now im pretty confused....... He keeps saying it was a mistake but how can 3 yrs be a mistake a double life i ask you.....im living alone with my son at the moment hes gone.....Grrrrrrr life a bummer sometimes... It's called him being a cake eater, he wants his cake and eat it too. I say drop him! Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted July 24, 2009 Share Posted July 24, 2009 There's nothing to be confused about. The words that come out of his mouth completely contradict his actions. Which one should you believe? His actions. Tell him to find a new place to live, and stop acting weak around this idiot. He's loving it that he can manipulate you like that, but it only makes him disrespect you more. Link to post Share on other sites
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