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Insecurity Projected


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Prior to getting married I had a bad break up with an ex boyfriend. It really was a pivitol relationship overall. I got married to someone else about one year and a half later but was not ready. I never had closure with my ex boyfriend and that had a big impact on the marriage. The marriage itself had other issues but this one I will own up to whole heartly. Was hard to admit then but not now. I caught up with my ex boyfriend 8 months ago and finally finally got the closure I always needed and wanted and it was wonderful to finally close that chapter of my life. I now look at it much differently. I am now dating a wonderful man that I love dearly. We were discussing ex's and he told me he was angry with his ex girlfriend on how she broke up with him and thought she was cold and hurtful. When he said that it all came back to me, the feelings the hurt the pain. Not actually feeling it but remembering and I became jealous. Is he not over this person, does he need closure, does he feel the way I felt. So being defensive I started a fight about it out of insecurity. I realized I was doing it when I was doing it but this is my exp with the topic. He and this lady broke up 4 years ago and do not live near each other and he told me he is way over her just could not believe the way she treated him at the end. I am overly sensitive to this and need to learn a way to deal with it overall. I am way over my ex so that is not the issue, its thinking everyone reacts or feels like me. Any advice? Time to get out of my bubble.

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you're dating a guy who's still not over a relationship that ended 4 years ago? i would run for the hills

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