moimeme Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 Well, to be fair, it isn't the easiest of things to essentially say to someone 'here's my heart' and have them say back 'uh, no thanks. Not really what I'm looking for'. What happens with these people is that they develop strong feelings before ever approaching the person in question so the stakes are a little higher. Having said that, it's good for a person to develop his or her resiliency and sense of self and sometimes the best way to do that is to go out on limbs knowing full well you may crash and burn but learn to manage that and deal with it when it happens. You'll have to do a lot of it in life so you might as well get in practice now! Link to post Share on other sites
midori Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 Originally posted by moimeme Having said that, it's good for a person to develop his or her resiliency and sense of self and sometimes the best way to do that is to go out on limbs knowing full well you may crash and burn but learn to manage that and deal with it when it happens. You'll have to do a lot of it in life so you might as well get in practice now! yep. Although I'd say you can crash without burning. Rejection does not need to mean utter devastation. And I absolutely agree that it's hard. But the sooner the lesson is learned the easier it is to go after what you want. Even if sometimes you don't get it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author monkey00 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 Originally posted by meanon I agree that it is not nice guy issue that is the problem here - self reliance, integrity and confidence are also important qualities in a partner. Also while you are doing all this interpreting, planning and moping how are you going to find the time to be fun to be with by enjoying yourself? As to how you tell her I would say speak to her face to face. This honest approach really is the best, however I feel a little hypocritical recommending it as I would never have done it at your age. Thinking back we used a variety of ways to test the other person's level of interest before making declarations most commonly humour (is he flirting or joking?). I really think you should stop agreeing that you are just a friend. Yep alrighty ill tell her this friday when i see her in class this friday. You know why i asked if telephone or in person is better??? Cause in person seems like putting them on the spot or pressure. while phone is easier in a way, you dont have to look them in the eye and all when the other doesnt feel the same way you do. Aye well, ill let you guys in on the results this friday....and if she rejects me, ill just probably crash...no burning peepz since i kinda know she considers me only a friend telling her might change the way she acts around me or try to push me away, but if she's gonna do that, then she isnt being a friend to me at all. here's whta i plan on saying, "I know you may not feel the same way about me, but i just wanted to let you know that i have these feelings for you. You dont have to say anything to me. I hope we can still continue being friends if thats what you want." Sounds good right? hehe Link to post Share on other sites
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