I love her, I really do - But I'm losing it.

[Faded]

Title could explain it all, but I'm going to elaborate.

 

This girl has been my everything for 2 years. We met online, we met in person, and we had a rough patch where we broke up and reconciled.

 

We're recently back together - And, while it was everything I could have hoped and dreamed for (Having her back in my life)..

 

The worries, the distance, and the lack of communication to a point has me going crazy. I work a very stressful job, and this ontop of it is just making it to the point where I don't know how to cope.

 

I don't want to come off as clingy, or possessive. I understand she needs to have her own life, and she needs to be able to do her own things.. But when there's seemingly no time for me, I begin to feel like I'm not really in a relationship.

 

Every time I tell her I love her, she tells me she loves me, too. When I say I miss her, she'll apologize, sometimes says she misses me too.

 

But i'm at a loss. I don't know what I can say or do to make her be around just a little bit more, to make her call me/answer at least once a day. I don't think I'm asking too much, am I? I don't want her to devote her entire day to talking to me. I just.. want to know she's alive, and well, and at least remembers that she has someone that can't keep his mind off of her at like, every moment of the day.

 

I don't even know what I'm looking for here. Breaking up with her is not an option, she's my own little piece of sanity. She's my everything, she honestly does make my world go 'round, when things are great, they really are, i've never been so happy in my life - But when things are like this, when I feel I barely mean anything to her, I just.. break.

 

I guess I just wish she'd come around again, and actually show me she loves me, instead of responding "I love you, too." - Afterall, actions do speak louder than words.

 

Sorry to rant, I just needed to get this off of my chest.

[hoping2heal]

Why did you two break up to begin with?

[Faded]

Wasn't really given a reason. She just wanted out, we never fought.

 

 

When we reconciled, it was her doing - She came back, I allowed it. I felt the same way as I did before we broke up.

[somuchpain]

Id just talk to her and tell her exactly what your feeling, and try and sort out some better communications between you. I dont think your asking to much at all, i know if i hardly ever got to speak to my gf i wouldnt be happy and would be upset, so just talk to her, thats always best.

[Lovin a scrapper]

Id just talk to her and tell her exactly what your feeling, and try and sort out some better communications between you. I dont think your asking to much at all, i know if i hardly ever got to speak to my gf i wouldnt be happy and would be upset, so just talk to her, thats always best.

 

 

I totally agree with you on this Seb.

 

Faded,

Talk to her about your feelings on this. At least if anything, you will know where you stand with her.

[Bayern]

How long is the distance? Maybe re-kindle the relationship with a visit.

 

I'd agree - talk to her.

[vanilla87]

Your post I can relate to completely. My BF does the same thing. I haven't heard from him in 3-4 days. Before that happened I didn't hear from him for almost a week! He gave me the excuse that his cell was "broken". I asked him why eh couldn't just email me or call my house or even send a regular letter if he had to do so. His response was that he doesn't use that stuff anymore. Total BS but I took it anyway, I'll chew him out for that at a later date when he does something worse.

 

Anyway, I feel like I'm at a breaking point as well. He works a lot, too much actually where it makes it hard to even talk to him. He lives far away. I'm in NY and he is FL. We only just got back together in early May, took a break for a few days last month, and now we are trying, but I'm at my last thread these days, ready to just leave him for good.

 

 

 

So yeah, you realize she isn't a mind reader, right? why not tell her that "I love you" isn't the same as showing her love to you. Got to make her see it from your point of view. If she works so much, then why not ask her when she has free time off, try and maybe surprise her then, but make sure she doesn't have any huge plans when you do it. Girls like big gestures every now and then, keeps the romance alive. It'll remind her that you do love her and that maybe she'll show you that she loves you too. Sometimes all it takes is a little nudge from your end to remind her.

[musgrrl]

I'm just curious to know if she's introverted? The reason I ask is because some introverted people can be really deep in their own world. They are content a lot of times with themselves and even though they want to have relationships with other people, they don't crave it as much as extroverts. I'm an introvert and need my space, which I get plenty of but my boyfriend is way more introverted than me. He works a lot more than I do and he doesn't get his time to himself so the weekends are more for him. Although we do communicate, it's not as much as I'd like.

 

Ideally, you want to not be in a long distance relationship with an extremely introverted person because it can be hard to pull them out of their own world. They are so content being there. But I'm in one. I fell in love. What can you do really accept keep trying?

[Faded]

There comes a point when push comes to shove.

 

I don't even know what to think anymore, really.

 

I've never been put in such a position in which whatever choice I make feels like the right and wrong choice, all at the same time.

 

The distance between us hasn't changed - She came around once since I wrote this and told me she loved me, and misses me, and then disappears again.

 

What do I gather from this? Nothing really - All I can say is she wasn't like this at first. She was always finding a way to talk to me, and now.. not so much.

 

The position i've been put in is basically if I should break up with her or not. I absolutely love this girl to death, she means the world to me - I thought there was nothing I wouldn't do for her - But this is it, right here. I won't keep hurting myself waiting for her to come back around again. I simply can't keep feeling this way.

[aerogurl87]

There comes a point when push comes to shove.

 

I don't even know what to think anymore, really.

 

I've never been put in such a position in which whatever choice I make feels like the right and wrong choice, all at the same time.

 

The distance between us hasn't changed - She came around once since I wrote this and told me she loved me, and misses me, and then disappears again.

 

What do I gather from this? Nothing really - All I can say is she wasn't like this at first. She was always finding a way to talk to me, and now.. not so much.

 

The position i've been put in is basically if I should break up with her or not. I absolutely love this girl to death, she means the world to me - I thought there was nothing I wouldn't do for her - But this is it, right here. I won't keep hurting myself waiting for her to come back around again. I simply can't keep feeling this way.

 

Well like someone else said, she's not a mind reader so why don't you tell her what you just wrote. Tell her that your at your wits end with feeling like she doesn't care. If she does care, she'll come around because she won't want to live without you. But if she doesn't she'll leave, it's that simple. I just went through something similar to this with my boyfriend when he told me he wanted space, which I gave him reluctantly. I said he had a week to think and I wouldn't communicate with him at all. Well he took 10 minutes to think, realized that he couldn't go longer than one day without hearing from me, and now we're happily back together. See my point?