Pandaren Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 Let me describe what I am going through. I have a friend who has a boyfriend, they've been dating for over a year and a half. She's really cool and I have a lot in common with her, but I am hesitant to hang out with her, despite the fact she frequently tries to arrange things. Normally I would go for it, but she is already seeing someone as I said and it's been long term. I have always subscribed to the thought that if they'll flirt with you and hang out with you and act as more than just a friend while they have boyfriend, they'll do the same to you. We have hung out in a group a couple of times, and I met her boyfriend and have been around him a couple of times. my impression is that he is a gigantic jerk. He's rude, arrogant, and he says some disrespectful things right in front of her such as "next time we're going to X bar down the street because they have hotter women and I want something to look at!" I would have never said that in front any of my previous girlfriends and most of my friends who are nice guys and good to their girlfriends and wives would never say that in front of their women. So I can see why she would be interacting with me the way she does. Maybe she fears leaving him and not being able to find someone else (which shows immaturity and insecurity imo which is something I try to avoid in the first place so that's another strike against her). I suppose I am just looking to see what everyone thinks, is dating a girl who leaves a long term relationship for you destined to fail and destined to come back around to bite me in the ass because it's inevitable she'd do the same thing to me whether we had a good relationship or not? Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 Generally speaking, girls like this will break up with their boyfriends, date someone else nicer and then cheat on them with the ex boyfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Pandaren Posted July 28, 2009 Author Share Posted July 28, 2009 Generally speaking, girls like this will break up with their boyfriends, date someone else nicer and then cheat on them with the ex boyfriend. That I could not handle. I can handle being shot down, dumped, and given the "no way in hell will I ever give you the time of day" look, and I have never been cheated on that I knew of, but I discovered a now ex-gf received a phone call from a previous love interest and tried to hide from me and that pretty much crushed me... ah well, she's really cool, but the instant I hear of them having a boyfriend I don't pursue. I don't want to be "that guy". Link to post Share on other sites
shunter Posted July 29, 2009 Share Posted July 29, 2009 lighten up a little. go out with her. whats the worst that can happen? you decide not to pursue it ? you date her for three months and then move on because it isnt working out ? but waiting for her to leave her boyfriend before seeing her is not going to change the way she is. so if you want and like her, then do it. Link to post Share on other sites
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