Just found out my childs father is dong coke

[finallysee]

Ok so here is the situation....I met my boyfriend 4 years ago and at that time he smoked weed on a regular basis. I wasn't thrilled about it but he kept that hidden from me (as well as the cigs) for about the 1st 6-7 months or so. He moved in with my family, I became pregnant with my first child (his 2nd) and we started planning for our future together. About 2 years ago while about 8 months pregnant I noticed he had white residue in his nose! I never had my heart race so fast...I was in such a shock. He didn't even realize it was there. I didn't say a word...he wasn't acting different or jumpy or weird. Later on that day I confronted him on it and he told me how much I had just insulted him, he didn't use drugs, didn't give me an explanation and stormed off. Looking back on it I can't believe I let it go...but I did.

Fast forward 2 years later to just the other day. I found a little baggy on the floor with white residue in it! The only thing I could think of was what if our child would have found it first. I ordered a drug kit and confirmed what I knew...it was cocaine. When I confronted him about it he lied and said it wasn't his...he even went as far as to say it must have been stuck to our dogs paw and the dog brought it in!!! (Oh, the things they say). He even swore on our child that it wasn't his and he was not using. I can't believe how easy it was for him to lie and how many times he must have lied to me in the past with those same penetrating eyes. Anyway after researching coke addiction I know for sure that he is and has been for years.

He has a problem with money

Has a CONSTANT nasal drip and uses Dristan on a regular basis

Always blows his nose, and hawks really loud and long the first thing in the morning.

Keeps to himself, is distant, wants space and privacy

Goes outside a lot to "walk the dog" or "have a smoke" and comes back in the house an hour later

He always wants me to be asleep or in the bedroom when he comes in late at night from what I thought was his time to smoke weed but the few times that I have been up I noticed his eyes were big and spacey. He couldn't focus right on me and silly nieve me never put 1 + 1 together. Weed makes your eyes slant...not get bigger!...I can go on and on.

He is a "functional cokehead", I know that much. He has held the same job for roughly 12 years, always on time etc. The only time I see the man I fell in love with is when he is with our child. He is such a great dad (or at least appears to be) that it clouded what was really going on. I can't understand how you would be willing to through your family away...

Here is my dilemna:

1. He owes a large sum of money to a family member that is due back on August 30th, 2. I also work a seasonal job from 8/20-9/10 (that pays GOOD money, but is basically an 12 hour day 6 days a week) and need him to bring our child to the babysitter every morning. (I leave at 6am, and can't do it, we are in a new area and am not around friends or family that can do it either). I am trying my best to keep to dislike for him down to a minimum but just looking at him makes me want to tell him to pack his crap and get the heck out!!!! However if I do that I think I can pretty much kiss my family member getting their money back goodbye (although when I first confronted him he said he would leave if I think that is what I have to do and that he would still pay back the money), and I won't be able to work my seasonal job and I'll need that money after I kick him out. It will cover the full rent, utilites and food for 3 1/2 months. This is a tough decision...I think about our child and I don't want him to slip up and leave something around again, but since he has been confronted he either has slowed down or doesn't bring anything in the house. I am like inspector gadget and I haven't found anything. On the other side of the coin...I will hurt us (my child and I) if I can't take this job to get the extra money that we will surely need. I managed to live with him for this long...is it wrong for me to do it for another 6 weeks?