Reggie Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Since my XWW's affair went kaput about a year ago, she has not been dating, according to my kids(they may not know as she was a big one for ONSs). In any case, the kids tell me that recently, one of her girlfriends that knew about the affair, has recommended she target a guy that is wealthy for a possible relationship. My XWW is very good looking, and, apparently , this guy was sort of bookish in highschool and blossomed as an adult, making lots of $$. My question is should I warn him? My XWW has had multiple affairs with married men before I knew her. Her entire family and my kids know of the affair she had when we were married. Her dad has expressed his regrets about not having warned me about her and her history before we married. I know her folks and they will say nothing to this guy. I was married to this woman for 10 years and the entire time she lied to me about having her college degree. Perhaps it is not my place to warn this guy. Link to post Share on other sites
tami-chan Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Since my XWW's affair went kaput about a year ago, she has not been dating, according to my kids(they may not know as she was a big one for ONSs). In any case, the kids tell me that recently, one of her girlfriends that knew about the affair, has recommended she target a guy that is wealthy for a possible relationship. My XWW is very good looking, and, apparently , this guy was sort of bookish in highschool and blossomed as an adult, making lots of $$. My question is should I warn him? My XWW has had multiple affairs with married men before I knew her. Her entire family and my kids know of the affair she had when we were married. Her dad has expressed his regrets about not having warned me about her and her history before we married. I know her folks and they will say nothing to this guy. I was married to this woman for 10 years and the entire time she lied to me about having her college degree. Perhaps it is not my place to warn this guy. You are right, it is not your place. Let her go..her life and her shenanigans should be of no interest to you--unless it is about your kids. Maybe she has matured and ready to settle down. Let her be. Link to post Share on other sites
KikiW Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 I would say something ONLY if you think it will negatively impact your children (i.e. if it blows up in her face, will the kids have to witness breakdowns, screaming BSs, things along those lines). I am a big advocate to protecting children from a parent's mistakes if at all possible. Link to post Share on other sites
boldjack Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 I agree with Tami. What she does now, should be none of your concern. Why do you even care? What is your motive? Desire for revenge? Link to post Share on other sites
boldjack Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Kiki's point is well taken. You should make sure that the kids welfare is your only concern, if you talk to the other man. Link to post Share on other sites
tami-chan Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 (((((boldjack)))) man, I just realized (read from another thread) I am not the only one who has a secret(well, not anymore lol) crush on you!!! hehe...! Sorry for the t/j! Kiki's point is well taken. You should make sure that the kids welfare is your only concern, if you talk to the other man. I agree. Intervene if the welfare of the kids is threatened. Otherwise, let her have her rich guy....happy ex-wife, happy kids, happy you, no?( at least, hopefully). Link to post Share on other sites
boldjack Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 TJ, again....Thank you sweetie!! You've made my night. Link to post Share on other sites
Athena Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Reggie, I would imagine that if the future H/ b/f of your exW ever asks you what happened, you shouldn't cover up for her... however, I guess you shouldn't go out of your way to spoil her chances, since, you wouldn't want her 'hounding' your prospective dates, inflicting her perspective of you onto them (although I totally get that she is the disordered one, not you). Link to post Share on other sites
Athena Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 (((((boldjack)))) man, I just realized (read from another thread) I am not the only one who has a secret(well, not anymore lol) crush on you!!! hehe...! Sorry for the t/j! Tami -- Boldjack is a Ladies Man!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Reg, only tell if your children are going to be impacted by her behavior. Sit back and wait, watch what goes on and only if they are going to be harmed, should you intervene. Link to post Share on other sites
2sure Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Is the potential new guy married / attached or available? That, to me, would make a difference. Link to post Share on other sites
2sure Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 Other than that - the whole scarlet letter thing ...just isnt up to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Reggie Posted August 3, 2009 Author Share Posted August 3, 2009 I agree. It would make me look nuts and he would not listen. I do not know the guy, but he must be an upgrade over her affair partner. I doubt I would have listened had I been warned. My sister reminded me of having expressed her concern to me and I went ahead, anyway. I am over my crush on boldjack, too. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 I might need to rethink my feelings for boldjack....too much drama. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Reggie Posted August 3, 2009 Author Share Posted August 3, 2009 I might need to rethink my feelings for boldjack....too much drama. Yes, it is a little over the top, syrupy/smarmy. Apparently, the bootlicking works on some folks, though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Reggie Posted August 3, 2009 Author Share Posted August 3, 2009 Isn't that boldjack in your avatar, donna? Link to post Share on other sites
stuckinoz Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 My question is should I warn him? Why should you care one way or the other what your ex-wife is up to? IF It involved the kids....Yep - But this is just you being a nosey ex husband. Unless you are interested in being part of your ex wife's love life...I'll say Nun-Ya-Biz....In my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Reggie Posted August 3, 2009 Author Share Posted August 3, 2009 :bunny:Agreed. Link to post Share on other sites
Athena Posted August 3, 2009 Share Posted August 3, 2009 I agree. It would make me look nuts and he would not listen. I do not know the guy, but he must be an upgrade over her affair partner. I doubt I would have listened had I been warned. My sister reminded me of having expressed her concern to me and I went ahead, anyway. I am over my crush on boldjack, too. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lmao::laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
Athena Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 Isn't that boldjack in your avatar, donna? Ha! He WISHES!!!! Nope, that is his son -- a chip off the ole block! Link to post Share on other sites
Gamine Posted August 5, 2009 Share Posted August 5, 2009 If there were no children involved, Reggie, I'd blab in a second. Link to post Share on other sites
tami-chan Posted August 5, 2009 Share Posted August 5, 2009 Nope, that is his son -- a chip off the ole block! LOL!!!! I thought it was!!!! !!! Link to post Share on other sites
tami-chan Posted August 5, 2009 Share Posted August 5, 2009 If there were no children involved, Reggie, I'd blab in a second. Give us a long explanation please, Gamine as to why you think he should - (apart from saving the new guy from the evil xWS and the destroying the prospect of her of having a better life than she has now-indeed, why should she when she clearly does not deserve it?)! Link to post Share on other sites
boldjack Posted August 5, 2009 Share Posted August 5, 2009 I guess I've arrived just in time for a mutiny. Lets see, Donna, Bent and Reg, no longer have crushes on me. Well hit me with big sticks, why don't you. I've always love Bent from afar, Donna has our love child as her avatar, and REg and I have exchanged verbal embraces for many months.:laugh: So now I'm chopped liver!! Well sucks to be me, don't it.:D Link to post Share on other sites
In Like Flynn Posted August 5, 2009 Share Posted August 5, 2009 I would let it happen....then I would tell the wife you are redoing the child support payments since she is now wealthy. Or you will drop the bomb on her wealthy smuck!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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