lupa Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 that was most certainly a reference to his dates...but he didn't mean their faces, that's for sure. Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 18, 2009 Author Share Posted August 18, 2009 :pLupa, you're horrible! Link to post Share on other sites
LisaUk Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 that was most certainly a reference to his dates...but he didn't mean their faces, that's for sure. I admit, missed that one altogether! Guess I'm just more innocent than you Lup's or less dirty minded! Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 I admit, missed that one altogether! Guess I'm just more innocent than you Lup's or less dirty minded! I'm sorry, but you left youself wide open for that one. Link to post Share on other sites
Auroracoladybug Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 Clean shaven yes! and ROFLMAO lupa! I had my drink go up my nose! Lisa we know you're not that innocent...okay maybe but I have one disadvantage...I am not established and being a newby I have no clue what anyone looks like on here Link to post Share on other sites
LisaUk Posted August 18, 2009 Share Posted August 18, 2009 Ok Ladybug, so I'm not THAT innocent! :laugh: I did miss it though! Won't be long before you are established (think it's about a month from joining), then we can add you to contacts and you will be able to see the pics! No worries Phin, LOL Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 It would all do our spouses a world of good if they could just get on this forum and read about all the heartache, pain, and confusion they have caused all of us. I truly feel if they could see the other side of things and put themselves in our shoes even by reading about it, then they would smarten the hell up! ...then again, maybe my husband wouldn't bc he seems to be so self absorbed right now, he can't see anything but what his perceptions of the situation are! My wife actually read my threads here. Left the laptop on while ai was at work. She laughed at the whole thing, even though I defended her the whole way, always believed the best right up to the end. It won't make a difference, they just don't care. Selfish!! I just posted a few pictures of myself so some of you can put a face to the name! These are not great pictures of me at all but it's at least something to put a face with the name! It so heartbreaking to look at pictures when my life was what I wanted! Now, my life is turned upside down, and although I know I'll get through it, I wish I could hit rewind! Tojaz-I totally exaggerated! I don't resemble Alyssa Milano! I thought maybe some features were similar but now that I look at some pictures of me, our features are nothing alike except our hair color! HAHA! I think Alyssa Milano would do nicely to play you. In those pics your a knockout, so I'd probably die if saw the good ones. Your son is adorable. The tux is great, a shine on the shoes and the whole nine yards, LOOKING GOOD! TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 19, 2009 Author Share Posted August 19, 2009 Haha, thanks Tojaz!! Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Clean shaven yes! and ROFLMAO lupa! I had my drink go up my nose! Lisa we know you're not that innocent...okay maybe but I have one disadvantage...I am not established and being a newby I have no clue what anyone looks like on here Ladybug, i don't think you have to be established to see pics, just post them. Try mine, I added you. I'm not clean shaven though, I look silly without the beard. LOL TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Broken Hearted I too am aghast how this slime ball can treat you. What I don't understand is the actions of the MIL. Her son is abandoning the mother of her 2 year old grand son, and a second grandchild on the way. WTF? Is there a father-in-law? I was lucky and had a very understanding and great dad. But were I to have abandoned his grandson bearing his last name, I have no doubt that he would knocked some sense in me. And he was not a man of violence. As he put it, "He brought me into this world and should I dishonor the family name, he would take me out?" That was no a threat, that was a matter of fact statement. And my mother, even though I am in my 60's and she in her 80's she would still grab me by my ear lobes. This kind of s**t is not allowed in my family. Ask my uncle, my dad's younger brother, her pulled the same s**t, abandoned his wife when she was just about due. A son, who could carry the family into the next generation. Uncle was never allowed in our house or any family function again. And that included his parents. My aunt and her family received all the support she needed from my dad and the rest of the family, she was part of the family my uncle was not Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Haha, thanks Tojaz!! Your welcome. You seem to be feeling better or at least in better spirits, seems to be a trend around LS last couple of days. You alright? Tojaz Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Broken Hearted I haven't seen your picture, but from the reaction of TOJAS and others it appears I am missing out on something. I don't know what goes through some men's minds. There must be an idiot gene. Look at all Prince Charles, cheating on Diana. I am not a royalty fan. She was beautiful, that smile, and look what he chose. That alone should bar him from becoming king. And Halle Berry - Bond Girl, Acadamy award winner, one of the sexiest woman of our time. And her loser husband cheats on her? That puts you in pretty good company, I know a club you don't want to belong to. Some men are idiots, and you married one of their kings. Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 19, 2009 Author Share Posted August 19, 2009 2.50 a gallon-I am certainly not Princess Diana or Halle Barry or anything close to their beauty, but I have always considered my husband to be a lucky man in terms of being married to me! Don't take this the wrong way bc I am not a self absorbed person! I am by no means drop dead gorgeous but I can get heads to turn from time to time, I love deeply and honestly, I'm a good mother, and I love playing sports! In my opinion, he had a good woman and wife in me and he threw me away for some white trash...and that's the truth, not just bc I hate what she's done, she really is white trash! If you click on my name and go to my profile, you can see the pics I've posted! I wish everyone had pics so I could put faces with all your names! Link to post Share on other sites
LisaUk Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 I am not established and being a newby I have no clue what anyone looks like on here Ladybug, as Tojaz rightly said you can view others pictures if they add you to contacts (sorry didn't realise), so I have added you to my contacts if you want to take a look, click my user name. (Gallon I added you as well). Broken, I disagree with you there, I think you are a very beautiful women , as much as someone like Diana or Halle, if not more so and your H IS an absolute fool. Like you said, you have much to offer someone and not just your looks, when you are ready some man is going to be very happy he met you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 19, 2009 Author Share Posted August 19, 2009 Well, it's official, I know I need to file for divorce! My husband is a stranger and he is turning nastier and nastier by the day! Everytime I talk to him, which isn't much, all he wants to talk about is selling the house and everything else. He hasn't lived there for 7 months now and he hasn't had a problem with not filing for divorce or anything else. I simply asked if we could wait another month or so to talk about these things so that I do not have anymore stress put on me and this baby before it's born! I am under more stress than I can handle right now and he is putting more and more on me everyday! He opened up his own checking acct. and has taken his check away from me! We planned our lives around me working part-time, not working at all on school vacations and summers, so that I could stay home with our kids. This means that I haven't gotten a paycheck since mid June! He rang up a $1200 credit card bill this month that I don't know how I'm going to pay! He told me he will not be paying for a house he isn't living in and I plan on going back to that house in a few weeks when this baby is born! He has cancelled trash pickup at our house and I'm sure will be cancelling more! I am being totally screwed over more and more everyday and I just can't understand how he can't see the stress he's putting on me and this baby I'm carrying! He wants the house on the market ASAP and told me I would have to live with my parents. THINGS ARE GOING TO GET NASTY! Link to post Share on other sites
LisaUk Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Broken, see a lawyer first thing tomorrow. You have rights, I would think you are entiltled to spousal support and certainly in the UK, if you have children the house is ALWAYS awarded to you and your H will have to pay the morgage or rent whether he likes it or not, that is the law, he has an obligation to support any children he has fathered until they turn 18. I can't say what your rights are in the US, so be sure to see a lawyer tomorrow. I beleive you can get legal aid in the US if you cannot afford one. I know you are under an immense amount of stress right now, more than most of us on here have had to deal with and we think we had it bad! BUT DO NOT LET THIS B******D SC**W YOU OVER. This is one of the reasons I am going to law school, not just for family law, but b/c people get s*****d on all levels, injustice. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 19, 2009 Share Posted August 19, 2009 Well, it's official, I know I need to file for divorce! My husband is a stranger and he is turning nastier and nastier by the day! Everytime I talk to him, which isn't much, all he wants to talk about is selling the house and everything else. He hasn't lived there for 7 months now and he hasn't had a problem with not filing for divorce or anything else. I simply asked if we could wait another month or so to talk about these things so that I do not have anymore stress put on me and this baby before it's born! I am under more stress than I can handle right now and he is putting more and more on me everyday! He opened up his own checking acct. and has taken his check away from me! We planned our lives around me working part-time, not working at all on school vacations and summers, so that I could stay home with our kids. This means that I haven't gotten a paycheck since mid June! He rang up a $1200 credit card bill this month that I don't know how I'm going to pay! He told me he will not be paying for a house he isn't living in and I plan on going back to that house in a few weeks when this baby is born! He has cancelled trash pickup at our house and I'm sure will be cancelling more! I am being totally screwed over more and more everyday and I just can't understand how he can't see the stress he's putting on me and this baby I'm carrying! He wants the house on the market ASAP and told me I would have to live with my parents. THINGS ARE GOING TO GET NASTY! Broken, see a lawyer ASAP!! You are entitled to a lot from him, and he's trying to pull the rug out from under you. He is still responsible for his share of the bills and mortgage, and that creditcard bill!! See a lawyer just to protect yourself. I still have most of my paperwork right here, PM' me with questions if you want. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
hopesndreams Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 Now you don't have to wonder if he will come to his senses and get back with you. Now you don't have to wonder if you would even take him back. No more wonder, no more hope of a future with him. When this happens, things move at a rapid pace. You will get over him!! Be angry, be very angry. Take him to the cleaners. Go for sole custody. Talk only through lawyers. Get everything that is rightfully yours and move fast on this, before he comes back with something that will make you doubt what you HAVE to do. Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 20, 2009 Author Share Posted August 20, 2009 Yeah, thanks for the responses everyone! I know I need to see a lawyer ASAP! I did see one right after I found out about the affair and it does sound like I will be getting much more than him as well as a very good portion of his monthly income for child support! Most likely, he will be ordered to pay me some sort of spousal support for at least a short time until I get myself on my feet. I was trying to figure out whether or not I want him in the delivery room when the baby is born. The only reason for me considering him in there was for the baby! I am terrified that he will not have anything to do with this baby bc he hasn't been there at all the entire pregnancy. My only hope with him in the delivery room was for him to form some sort of connection with the baby seeing it born! A week ago, he asked me if he could be in the delivery room for the baby's birth and I was thinking I was going to let him. Tonight when I had to call him about his check (since it hadn't come to the house) he told me he wanted to be in the delivery room but that he wasn't going to be my coach and I would have to do it on my own. I THINK MY MIND IS MADE UP NOW! Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 Yeah, thanks for the responses everyone! I know I need to see a lawyer ASAP! I did see one right after I found out about the affair and it does sound like I will be getting much more than him as well as a very good portion of his monthly income for child support! Most likely, he will be ordered to pay me some sort of spousal support for at least a short time until I get myself on my feet. I was trying to figure out whether or not I want him in the delivery room when the baby is born. The only reason for me considering him in there was for the baby! I am terrified that he will not have anything to do with this baby bc he hasn't been there at all the entire pregnancy. My only hope with him in the delivery room was for him to form some sort of connection with the baby seeing it born! A week ago, he asked me if he could be in the delivery room for the baby's birth and I was thinking I was going to let him. Tonight when I had to call him about his check (since it hadn't come to the house) he told me he wanted to be in the delivery room but that he wasn't going to be my coach and I would have to do it on my own. I THINK MY MIND IS MADE UP NOW! You have got to be kidding me!!!! He actually said that to you!!!! :mad: I cant even type.... I need a moment!:mad: TOJAZ:mad: Link to post Share on other sites
Author broken hearted Posted August 20, 2009 Author Share Posted August 20, 2009 Pretty crazy huh? I can't even believe that my heart still loves what this man once was! Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 You have got to be kidding me!!!! He actually said that to you!!!! :mad: I cant even type.... I need a moment!:mad: TOJAZ:mad: O.k. i'm better now! I'm glad you spoke to a lawyer. You need to protect yourself. The delivery room, I can understand you wanting him to have a connection to his child, but thats a stressful enough situation without you having to see him standing there, especialy after what he said to you. Thats a time your going to need support, not this a$$. I'ts obviously your decision, but my advice would be to tell him he gave up that privilege when he left! TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
pole_cat Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 Wow - he certainly harbors a tremendous amount of resentment toward you. From your initial post on June 18th, seems he'd have reason to do so: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t192415/ If you have apologized and acknowledged your mistakes, then there is nothing more to be done. I have seen men that are passive explode and come to hate the woman that they are with. She becomes a reminder of the version of himself that he despises (doormat, jack*ass, tool, whipping post, etc...). Unfortunately, the only unconditional love we can hope for in this life is the love from a parent/parental figure. Not from a spouse. Link to post Share on other sites
Auroracoladybug Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 BH WTF! don't have him in the delivery room! have him look from the glass better yet he can see the baby when you chose...close all accounts with his access now! if you cant close it call them! get a new account for everything so that he can't do this crap to you and while your at it forward all of the bills that are possible to him...ask the neighbor if you can add your trash for a little while to their pick up and get help from the county you live in...I make to much to get any help and my paycheck only covers the mortgage...you could move in with me...I was thinking about asking J to try for another (even did when I was dissilousioned that we would work this out)...I miss my baby days...atleast I would help! LOL you hand him back his a$$ Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted August 20, 2009 Share Posted August 20, 2009 broken hearted tojaz / phineas had it right, I got see your photo tonight you are Bond material. I am envious as you look like my high school crush that I was able to get one kiss from. Your husband is indeed King of the Idiots. Is he allowed to drive a car? Scarey When word gets out that you are available again, the line from your front door is going to be so long you are going to have to tell them to take a number. And if it isn't, then move to another state, as it would be proof that you are living in the land of Idiots. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts