If you catch your Mom cheating

[Citizen Erased]

Don't you think it should be the mom's responsibility to tell the his Dad? If it were me, I'd have a chat with my mom, and if she refused to talk to Dad, then I'd maybe talk to them together. But I really don't think it should be OP to tell the dad. It's going to be hard enough for him to tell his mom, and he shouldn't have to bare the burden of giving this news to his dad.

 

I'm just not convinced a conversation with his mother will result in anything. She could talk him out of going to his dad with it, get her hands on the video and delete it, anything. I think I like the getting them together in the one room idea more and more.

 

I can see how it would be better to tell his mother though. All these options but he has to decide which one he prefers, which one he can live with.

[dreamergrl]

I'm just not convinced a conversation with his mother will result in anything. She could talk him out of going to his dad with it, get her hands on the video and delete it, anything. I think I like the getting them together in the one room idea more and more.

 

I can see how it would be better to tell his mother though. All these options but he has to decide which one he prefers, which one he can live with.

 

 

I get what you mean about the mom, but he keep the tape so he still has the proof. I'm worried about how the dad will react taking the news from OP. I'm not saying dad is this way, but you know some people will resent the person who brings them the news as much as the person hurt them. He's going to know that the son knew about it first.. and well... could turn out bad. I hope not, as I'd hate to see that happen here.

 

If it were me, I'd tell my mom what I knew, state that I had proof, and if she didn't do anything about it, I'd hand the tape over to the dad. But first I'd try to talk to the mom.

 

OP, please let us know how this turns out for you.

[MichiganMan222]

If it were me in that situation, before I approached mom or dad directoly, I would do some recon and find out things like who it is, look for any online or cell phone correspondence, possibly when and where they might routinely be together, etc and somehow I would steer dad towards the evidence for him to discover on his own. Then let him take over. The cat is out of the bag on its own merit and I wouldn't have overtly betrayed anyone. No need to show anyone the video.

[Lucky_One]

A bit of a t/j, but I am supercurious as to the make and model of your tape and of the camera. It has a truly amazing battery life, if it could remain on and taping for both your video shoot, for your sister's make-out session, and for two escapades of your mother with a strange man. And not only the battery life, but the actual tape. Pretty impression tape.

 

My biggest piece of advice is for you is to NOT go driving at age 14 anymore, especially if you are mugging for a camera which is taped below a dashboard (you must have gotten some amazingly weird shots of everyone's knees). Your folks need to have their heads examined for letting you out driving at your age.

[sally4sara]

I think it's better when kids learn reality at a young age.

 

Yeah TOTALLY! The kid is waaaayyyy better off for this happening!

[sally4sara]

A bit of a t/j, but I am supercurious as to the make and model of your tape and of the camera. It has a truly amazing battery life, if it could remain on and taping for both your video shoot, for your sister's make-out session, and for two escapades of your mother with a strange man. And not only the battery life, but the actual tape. Pretty impression tape.

 

My biggest piece of advice is for you is to NOT go driving at age 14 anymore, especially if you are mugging for a camera which is taped below a dashboard (you must have gotten some amazingly weird shots of everyone's knees). Your folks need to have their heads examined for letting you out driving at your age.

 

Yeah that was the first thing I was wondering about!

[quankanne]

Thanks for the warning. My sister is pretty betraying. And I thought my principal looked sketchy.

 

:lmao: thank heavens ypu're bot a misogynist in training!

 

as much as you want to avoid trouble, I think the best thing to do is to approach your parents together without giving them fair warning – that way your mom can't deny what's going on and so that your dad is in on it from the beginning. You'll probably be in the hotseat, but then again, your parents will be forced to deal with their marriage.

 

the only bad thing is that it could create a rift ...

 

other thought is to get rid of the tape/evidence, but have a "talk" with your mother about relationships. Ask her advice about what are the boundaries when you get into a relationship with someone, and if it's ever okay to "step out" on the other person if the opportunity arises. And you could question it as, "it must be really hard being married to the same person forever. Would you ever do that to Dad? Kiss another man or do something more?"

 

while it doesn't exactly bust her, it might give her serious food for thought, and take it from a situation of guilty pleasure kissing another dude to "OMG, this shxt affects the whole family" ...

 

if she asks what made you wonder, tell her you and some of the guys were talking about girls, and some of them made like it was okay to kiss another girl when they were dating someone else. A lie, yes, but more of a white lie intended to get your mom to think of the consequences.

[Lucky_One]

You know that posters here really don't believe that you can tape a camcorder UNDER a dashboard and get footage of people kissing? When even a small camcamcorder is 3.5" x 2.5" x 4.5" plus, it will make quite a little bundle. Using that much tape to hold up a 14oz+ product securely is a good way to screw up some buttons on your camcorder. As well, a small camcorder uses a 30 or 60 min DVD-R, or a 30 min tape.

 

Having a camera in a fixed position is never a good way to get the image you want in focus. How utterly lucky that this child was able to capture his mom kissing on a 60 min (max) tape.

 

When people want to record so-called music videos, they mount the camcorder on TOP of the dashboard so that they can see faces, and it would be impossible to capture both the guitarist and the driver with a fixed camera (it would take a cameraman on the hood of the car or a cam with remote adjustment in order to move the camera to capture both of these children in the front seat of the car. Mounting a camera under a dashboard means that these kids were going for crotch shots of his big sister, so that they could whack off to her VS panties.

 

I can't believe some of the stuff people will fall for.....

[quankanne]

maybe ... but there's also been some well-thought-out advice, and that's what's important.

[Lucky_One]

And a bad thing when people use their time and their good advice on a troll. Lots of other people here who could use real help, instead of thinking about the evil man who is screwing Mommy.

[Woggle]

Yeah TOTALLY! The kid is waaaayyyy better off for this happening!

 

In a way I think he is. People usually have to learn reality the hard way and instead of him learning in his 30s when a woman he commited to and possible started a family with betrays him he learns now at a young age. Deep down most women are like his mother and he got a good wakeup call at age 14.

[burning 4 revenge]

In a way I think he is. People usually have to learn reality the hard way and instead of him learning in his 30s when a woman he commited to and possible started a family with betrays him he learns now at a young age. Deep down most women are like his mother and he got a good wakeup call at age 14.

When you say deep down do you mean women are more promiscuous by their very nature?

 

Do you think their nature makes them more prone to desire variety and dispose of men?

 

Do you think theyre basically insatiable holes...stariting at the fundamental genital level.. sucking in anything they can take from men?

[Woggle]

Do you think theyre basically insatiable holes...stariting at the fundamental genital level.. sucking in anything they can take from men?

 

This one. They can't be satisfied no matter what a man a does and sooner or later most will grow to resent him. This is why they betray a man with no remorse and they think they are entitled to it. This kid got his gender education at a young age.

[Citizen Erased]

When you say deep down do you mean women are more promiscuous by their very nature?

 

Do you think their nature makes them more prone to desire variety and dispose of men?

 

Do you think theyre basically insatiable holes...stariting at the fundamental genital level.. sucking in anything they can take from men?

 

Can you please not quote Woggle, I'd rather not have to read his posts. Thanks.

[sally4sara]

This one. They can't be satisfied no matter what a man a does and sooner or later most will grow to resent him. This is why they betray a man with no remorse and they think they are entitled to it. This kid got his gender education at a young age.

 

Wow Wogs, I mean Roger Waters; I had no idea The Wall was about you.

 

I think it just gets you off to say things like this. No one who believes this gets married to a woman and I've never met a straight guy that scared of vagina. I mean, VAGINA:mad:!

 

Big scary vagina.

[boy14]

When people want to record so-called music videos, they mount the camcorder on TOP of the dashboard so that they can see faces, and it would be impossible to capture both the guitarist and the driver with a fixed camera (it would take a cameraman on the hood of the car or a cam with remote adjustment in order to move the camera to capture both of these children in the front seat of the car. Mounting a camera under a dashboard means that these kids were going for crotch shots of his big sister, so that they could whack off to her VS panties.

I can't believe some of the stuff people will fall for.....

 

Wow. Okay, listen lucky lady- let's get this straight. I'm not your H so keep your menopausal attitudes to yourself. I got enough of my plate right now without having to worry about some old mental person with a chip on their shoulder who go all PMS and take their frustrations out on me. Because, guess what? I can't make you believe me. I can't make you give me help. If you don't believe me, state your reasons and then move on off my thread. Don't take jabs at my sister- like that's totally gross. I know your type anyway. You're like those Youtube people who after every video makes some stupid negative comment. The truth is you would never believe me because I hardly believe my story myself! If I said, I caught my Mom cheating, you would have thought "troll." If I said, I saw my Mom get drunk and kiss a guy, you would have said "troll." If I said I got the footage hanging out of my ass you would have said, "troll." So, don't bother coming back, and take that TaraMaiden with you.

 

I'm not attracted to older women like 40++ unless you're like Angelina or JLo. If you're not a celeb look-a-like, don't come on here thinking you can gather up little boys- I know how that goes. I got garlic and holy water. I can recite the ten commandments- don't f** w/ me. The advice was pretty good until you came along talking about panties and my sister. Like gross, lady- you're one sick mother. You might want to rethink your sexual orientation. Your H Harry may be hubby Harriet.

 

To everyone else:

 

Again, the camera isn't mine. It's my friend's. My friends and I took it from his father's garden when we thought we might have some fun in the car. My friend's father bought the camera because the guy is obsessed with his small plot of a garden and swears up and down that somebody's dog has been taking poops and messing up in his garden and he's hellbent on catching the culprit so he can fine the owners. He's been threatening neighbors for years and finally raised enough money to buy an expensive small, sleek black camera with a rotating lenses and hid it outside over his garden. He wanted it to be hidden well so nobody could see it and therefore he could catch them at it. He's even threatened little kids with taking them to jail for trespassing. He used to check it everyday but now he doesn't check it unless he sees like a suspicious footprint somewhere in his yard. The thing about the camera is you have to load the footage onto your comp or Dvd to see it. l don't know how long it runs either- I haven't watched the whole movie to the end. And I don't think I want to.

 

My friend and I took it. We were going to replace it after we were finished, but as you know we got distracted. Now, I have the camera. I asked him if his old man has said anything about the camera and he told me there has been no questions yet. That's why I have to confront my parents soon so I won't get my friend in trouble.

 

At the end of the day, it's the same anyway. I have my Mom on footage cheating with another man. I checked again today, and it's there. The same guy. The same kisses. And the same romantic scene.

 

Also, you didn't read it right, Lucky. I didn't catch my sister. I was intending to- no lie- but I got distracted when my Mom popped up on the screen. Then I didn't watch the rest. Seeing my Mom snog someone is enough for me. It's not like I don't know what a vagina looks like anyway. If I didn't I wouldn't look at my sister's.

 

The reason I drove that day was because my Mom said she needed to pick up some laundry detergent but didn't feel like going. So I volunteered happily and appealed to her better nature. My parents won't let me hit the interstate, if that's what you mean. But I picked up my friend, pumped some gas into the car and went and bought the detergent and Snicker's bar. We didn't come straight back. We drove around the block a couple of times, showing off, screaming out of the sunroof and dancing, until it got hot and Grand Theft Auto called us back.

 

Can I do it this weekend? I will do it this weekend- tell both of my parents. I gave my friend the deadline. I told him he didn't have to do it with me- I wasn't going to tell them about him and he looked relieved. I'm going to do it by myself- both of them with the footage. I'm getting my stuff ready and I don't want to do it when Dad's going to be stressed with work. It'll ruin his weekend though.

 

I'll answer other people's posts now.

[boy14]

If it were me in that situation, before I approached mom or dad directoly, I would do some recon and find out things like who it is, look for any online or cell phone correspondence, possibly when and where they might routinely be together, etc and somehow I would steer dad towards the evidence for him to discover on his own. Then let him take over. The cat is out of the bag on its own merit and I wouldn't have overtly betrayed anyone. No need to show anyone the video.

 

This may be selfish but I don't want to know anymore than I already do. If my Mom talks on the phone to him wayy more than my sister does to her friends, I would rather not find out. That would be a lot too seeing as how my sister runs to the phone like the Messiah is calling her.

[boy14]

I promise I won't let this guy try to get in over my Dad. I won't let him ruin my family. I trust my Dad anyway- he'll know what to do when he has all the information. This weekend the chips will fall where they may.

 

I'm going to look up all the information I need. Should I try to sound smart and say stuff like, "Obviously, Mother is in an affair fog. An affair fog is..."

 

I'm trying to hold it together but today I messed up. I did what I always do when I feel like the world is falling on my shoulders. You guy are going to laugh but I went and gave my Mom a hug. A big hug like a baby. She asked me questions but I didn't answer her. I just hugged. I know I got to grow up anyway but her hugs are still the best.

 

Two years from now I'm going to deny I ever wrote this thread. See you guys.

[Woggle]

Wow Wogs, I mean Roger Waters; I had no idea The Wall was about you.

 

I think it just gets you off to say things like this. No one who believes this gets married to a woman and I've never met a straight guy that scared of vagina. I mean, VAGINA:mad:!

 

Big scary vagina.

 

I am not scared of vagina. I am more worried about the mind attached to it. I happened to meet a good woman. Maybe my wife was a man in a past life that was screwed over by a woman and that is why she is one of the rare females that actually has empathy for men.

[lkjh]

Tell your dad

[quankanne]

be upfront about how you got the footage: that you borrowed the camera and were goofing around as if you were on a music video and forgot it was there. When you went through the footage to see yourself acting up, instead you saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus. And that for the longest time you weren't sure what to do because you knew this information was going to change everything. So you asked to talk to them together.

 

it might also help to tell your folks that you understand if they're fixing to be angry with you, but you were taken just by surprise by this information on the footage as they are. And that you love the both of them no matter what.

 

am grabbing for straws here, but I realize that when you sit down with them for The Talk, you're going to be catapaulted into adulthood way before your time.

 

Big scary vagina.

 

okay, this just pulled me out of this morning's cranky mood. Thanks for the imagery of a hoo-hoo with fangs, looking for a kill!

[dreamergrl]

be upfront about how you got the footage: that you borrowed the camera and were goofing around as if you were on a music video and forgot it was there. When you went through the footage to see yourself acting up, instead you saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus. And that for the longest time you weren't sure what to do because you knew this information was going to change everything. So you asked to talk to them together.

 

it might also help to tell your folks that you understand if they're fixing to be angry with you, but you were taken just by surprise by this information on the footage as they are. And that you love the both of them no matter what.

 

am grabbing for straws here, but I realize that when you sit down with them for The Talk, you're going to be catapaulted into adulthood way before your time.

 

Big scary vagina.

 

okay, this just pulled me out of this morning's cranky mood. Thanks for the imagery of a hoo-hoo with fangs, looking for a kill!

 

http://www.zazzle.com/fang_face_smiley_sticker-217107146781995702

[quankanne]

:lmao:

 

you're terrible!

[Vet]

Stop trying to surreptitiously capture video of people. You know you didn't accidentally leave a video camera attached to a hidden place with the video rolling. You are 14 and can understand the ramifications of your actions just as well as you can understand that your parents' relationship does not have anything to do with you. If your mother is cheating, it will come out eventually and it is something that your parents must work on, not you. This will be a lesson that you have to learn: don't look for things you don't want to find.

[love2dance]

This is so fake. 14 year-olds don't write the way he does. This is an old, silly man. Most 14 year-olds use text-type and don't know anything about menopause. The tone keeps changing in the posts, and the first post was full of emoticons but none in the rest. Nice try Boy14...you must be too old to remember (im)maturity level of 14 year-old boys. Maybe you are taking a creative writing course at the senior home, but the forum is for real people with real problems.