brelynnda Posted November 15, 2003 Share Posted November 15, 2003 [color=blue][/color]Am I nuts or what....after 18 years of marriage i've went and slipped. Found love from someone who I am crazy about.It didn't start out that way but it ended up that way.He is married also. Tell me is this a mid life crisis? What the hell is a mid life crisis anyway? I didn't think I could feel this way. Is it bliss? Has anyone every been in this situation? Can a relationship that started with cheating ever work out? I need to talk to someone who has been in this situation a longer period of time. Has anyone out there left for another man or woman....and not regreted it? HELP.......... Link to post Share on other sites
moonspinner Posted November 16, 2003 Share Posted November 16, 2003 But you can seek counseling or divorce your spouse. Guilt is a waste of time....Figure out what part of you wants to be recognized in mid-life ( if that is where you are), then manifest. Forgive yourself for f**king-up others and yourself and poke around the ashes of those lives flamed to find something of value. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted November 16, 2003 Share Posted November 16, 2003 After 18 years of marriage, there are lots of people who will give you an initial rush of bliss. However, it could very easily turn into the world's greatest nightmare in short time. If you just don't want to be married to your husband anymore, if you no longer desire to be in a committed relationship, get a divorce. Then date around. There are lots of men out there who can give you that rush of excitement but that doesn't mean they are right for you. It takes a long time of getting to know somebody to know if they are right...or not....and even then you can't be absolutely certain. Link to post Share on other sites
mixedup1 Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 Ya, what he said, Do you know how your spouse will be affected by this?? If he has no idea, let me tell you, if he loves you, you will absolutely shatter him, regardless of what type a person he is. If he has seen the signs, some do but don't let on. You could actually be in for a nasty surprise yourself. But go to yahoo, type in Dr. Harley. I am the faithfull spouse who was cheated on and still is being cheated on. Dr. Harley is a marriage counselor but makes dang good sense of explaining what actually happens on both ends of the stick (marriage). You need to disect your marriage, realize what made you have the affair, usually lack of listening and communication from your hubby. Your in deep already, it's only going to get deeper. You will understand once you check out his site. But an affair is similar to a drug, say......cocaine, intense high while you having sex, but you also have withdrawls when it shatters into pieces usually when a spouse finds out who hasnt been cheating, run away if this happens, most men freak. You need to get out of your marriage, divorce first, screw around second. Have some compasion for pete's sake, you need to re read your wedding vows, they are very crushing to the conscience when re reading them after a while. You are totally doing the worst thing a person can do in a marriage to the other involved. Don't be cruel, for your own satisfaction. Do the right thing and divorce the one you promised all those promises to, break his heart and let him move on too. Don't hog up that selfish self gratification to yourself, while he's home doing whatever, probly waiting for you to get back from your sick friends house or your shopping excursion like you told him. It hurts real bad for a long long time. I am sorry but It does, and I think your a mean person. But, I have no room to speak cause I am not perfect, I just know how it feels to totally find out being clueless to my wifes affair. I wouldnt wish that pain on even you. Link to post Share on other sites
mixedup1 Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 Ya, what he said, Do you know how your spouse will be affected by this?? If he has no idea, let me tell you, if he loves you, you will absolutely shatter him, regardless of what type a person he is. If he has seen the signs, some do but don't let on. You could actually be in for a nasty surprise yourself. But go to yahoo, type in Dr. Harley. I am the faithfull spouse who was cheated on and still is being cheated on. Dr. Harley is a marriage counselor but makes dang good sense of explaining what actually happens on both ends of the stick (marriage). You need to disect your marriage, realize what made you have the affair, usually lack of listening and communication from your hubby. Your in deep already, it's only going to get deeper. You will understand once you check out his site. But an affair is similar to a drug, say......cocaine, intense high while you having sex, but you also have withdrawls when it shatters into pieces usually when a spouse finds out who hasnt been cheating, run away if this happens, most men freak. You need to get out of your marriage, divorce first, screw around second. Have some compasion for pete's sake, you need to re read your wedding vows, they are very crushing to the conscience when re reading them after a while. You are totally doing the worst thing a person can do in a marriage to the other involved. Don't be cruel, for your own satisfaction. Do the right thing and divorce the one you promised all those promises to, break his heart and let him move on too. Don't hog up that selfish self gratification to yourself, while he's home doing whatever, probly waiting for you to get back from your sick friends house or your shopping excursion like you told him. It hurts real bad for a long long time. I am sorry but It does, and I think your a mean person. But, I have no room to speak cause I am not perfect, I just know how it feels to totally find out being clueless to my wifes affair. I wouldnt wish that pain on even you. <URL removed> Thats the link, check it out, build something, don't destroy what you have built. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts