I think I am dependent on alcohol

[venka]

I never thought I was an alcoholic, the amount I drink is not usually huge and I also don't usually drink alone or every day etc. But lately I've started to think I am dependent on alcohol or I am a problem drinker. My career and my social life seems to revolve around alcohol. I feel like alcohol loosens me up and makes it easier for me to be friendly and social.

 

As an example of the alcohol I drink, I go to happy hour with my bosses about two times a week, sometimes one time a week, and I usually drink 2 to 3 drinks. Usually flavored vodka and soda water as I try to watch my calories. Sometimes beer. My boss knows the bartender and I think they make these drinks really strong because sometimes I get drunk and sometimes I wake up with a hangover feeling nasty and that's why I think I may have a problem. I may go out with a friend for happy hour or dinner one other time during the week and have about two drinks. On Wednesdays my friends and I play poker and I usually have 2 or 3 beers.(So all in all I would say that on average I drink twice during the week, 2 - 3 drinks each time.) When I go out with friends on the weekend or have parties, I binge drink too much for sure... about 6 mixed drinks and sometimes a beer or two and sometimes a shot or two. That usually happens maybe every other week, otherwise if it's like a barbeque or dinner etc. with friends I'll have maybe like two or three drinks.

 

In the past I have done really stupid things because of alcohol and have made a fool of myself and have let other people down. I have tried to cut back so that I don't do these things and I have pretty much been successful over the past few years and I don't binge drink nearly as much as I used to, nor do I usually get highly emotional when drunk like I used to... I have tried to learn my limits. Except that recently I really let down someone I love and that has got me thinking about all of this. When I'm upset and I drink I get really really emotional and angry and hurtful (which was the situation last time).

 

It used to be that the other times I felt happy when I got tipsy or drunk and I guess that's part of the reason I do it, I liked that happy feeling. But lately I've noticed that even after one drink, I feel depressed and down. I think this could be because I keep telling myself I want to stop drinking and then I don't and then I feel guilty and/or mad at myself. Or maybe I have just built my tolerance up and now it makes me feel depressed instead of happy.

 

So that is my story and I am trying to figure out how big of a problem it is, if I should just stop drinking all together, which I feel would be really really hard for me in my career and social settings, or if I should limit myself to two drinks, etc.

[O_angelsparkle_O]

2-3 drinks daily, plus lots of drinking on the weekend...I do think that is too much.

 

I understand the work related drinking...and the drinking at dinner...but maybe cut back even more! What about drinking with the boss one week and having soda while eating dinner with a friend? Or you could switch? You have got to give your body (YOUR LIVER) a break. It really isn't healthy for you to be drinking that much.

 

I'm glad you're watching your emotional stability. Sometimes life is hard or lonely...or sometimes we just feel SH*#TY...I've been there. But try to mix it up on the comforting solutions. I'm sure you have other interests than drinking? How about re-connecting with those?

[kizik]

I would begin by cutting down, as you suggested yourself, because quitting ANYthing cold turkey is unrealistic and occasionally unsafe.

 

It would also be a good idea to sit in on an AA meeting in your town and see if the conversation and stories strike anything emotional within you. Many alcoholics can be "mirrors" for ourselves. I had an Addictions class some years back and was profoundly affected by people's stories.

[venka]

Thanks for the responses. I have a lot of other interests - I run or work out pretty much every day, often with my dog, I love to read and write, my boyfriend and I like to cook and watch movies and do all the normal boyfriend/girlfriend things. And I think I've gotten to a point where I just don't see the appeal of alcohol anymore. I see all the bad things about it and very little good except that it helps me be less shy, but I would rather learn to be more confident and friendly and outspoken without alcohol.

 

I'm thinking that if I *couldn't* stop drinking it for a week, then that means I definitely have a problem. Some of the problem is dealing with peer pressure and my bosses' expectations because the hardest part for me, I think, will be telling them, I just don't want to drink. To me that shows that it's not just an alcohol problem but it's also related to my personality and my way of dealing with things and people. I want to be accepted at my job even if I don't drink.

 

I think that if I could just cut out alcohol for awhile, I would be okay with truly having it just once in awhile, at a party or a nice date out, etc., but right now it is too much, my life seems to revolve around it.

[sugarmomma]

Alcoholism occurs as a result of the obsessive thoughts and compulsive behavior associated with drinking. I would suggest that you try to go 30 days straight without any alcohol. If you can't, you may have a problem because that means that your thoughts about drinking are in control of your behavior. If you can, after the 30 days just limit it to 1-3 drinks per month.

 

Alcohol almost everyday is a cause for concern.

[venka]

Hmmm, I have obsessive/compulsive thoughts about a lot of things.

 

I had already decided to try what you suggested, sugarmomma, and take a break from drinking and see how I feel. I told myself two weeks because I have a labor day beach trip with my family coming up. Today is my fifth day and it hasn't been very hard. The hardest thing was telling my co-workers I wasn't going to happy hour yesterday after work - I think maybe I drink to appease/please people socially?? But I just told him I had a work out date (which I did, with myself!) and it wasn't nearly as hard as I had feared.

 

Now I am realizing that the down sides of alcohol really outweigh the up side. I've been being really haelthy and I feel like even at the beach it might be just as refreshing to have an orange or a pineapple as a drink!

[Art_Critic]

I'm thinking that if I *couldn't* stop drinking it for a week, then that means I definitely have a problem.

 

I'm going to chime in on something..

 

I have always felt that if a person asks themselves if they have a problem with Alcohol then yes they do, as a person who has no problem with their drinking doesn't ask themselves that.

 

So, yes.... you do have a drinking problem.

 

You won't be successful in just cutting back as it has a way of creeping right back in and before long you are actually drinking more than you did before.

 

Quitting is the only answer at this point.. then when your head is clear you can re-evaluate why you were using Alcohol and go from there..

 

If you feel you are an Alcoholic then giving it up for good and for all is the only answer..

What's the phrase for an Alcoholic " One drink is too many and a thousand is not enough "

 

Good Luck...

[calizagg]

I don't think you have a problem..People go through phases. If you are having fun enjoy it.

[Tayla]

Art Critic is correct. Enough said.

[Meaplus3]

I have always felt that if a person asks themselves if they have a problem with Alcohol then yes they do, as a person who has no problem with their drinking doesn't ask themselves that.

 

 

Yes.. this is so true what A_C said here. So, you might want to either one try to stop on your own. And if that does not work, seek help for it. There is lot's of help available out there. You can master this.. just need the willingness to accept that a change is needed. Good luck to ya!

 

Mea:)

[burning 4 revenge]

Have you considered just cutting out the hard liqour?

 

I only drink beer and I never get drunk

[calizagg]

Are you people on the thread telling me none of you ever got drunk? Or if you did you then completely quit drinking or went to seek help? Or never had drinks with coworkers or friends after work?

 

In my mid 20's my friends and I would go out 3-4 nights a week. It was fun. None of us became "alcoholics" or even drink that much at all anymore.

[Meaplus3]

Are you people on the thread telling me none of you ever got drunk? Or if you did you then completely quit drinking or went to seek help? Or never had drinks with coworkers or friends after work?

 

Unless I missed something, I don't think anyone said that at all here!

 

 

In my mid 20's my friends and I would go out 3-4 nights a week. It was fun. None of us became "alcoholics" or even drink that much at all anymore.

 

And for some this can hold true. But for others it's not the case. I really think that if anyone has to ask themselves if they have an is with alcohol.. then in most cases they do. Just my 2 cents!

 

Mea:)

[giotto]

if you are asking yourself this, then you might have a problem. Obviously, you feel that you are becoming dependent on alcohol. You have a choice: you can moderate (rarely works), you can give up completely or you can carry on. Last option might get you even more deeply into trouble, though. Alcohol is a nasty beast and will take over your life if you are not careful...