Would appreciate someone to read cause im all messed up and have no one =(

[Madandsad]

I have been with Katie for almost 9 years since 2001. I am 27 and she is 23 now. We met young and we have 3 children. Katie had a reputation when I met her she was with many men but I fell in love with her and thought she loved me too. Throughout our lives she has cheated on me it always seems around the same time of the year too between august-november for some reason. to break it down ill place years and the things she done along with the excuses after. And these are only instances I know of for sure.

 

2001: Found a note she wrote to her ex boyfriend and she said it was a joke...

 

2002: She was with another girl sexually...

 

2003: My brother was staying with us and while I was working she was having sex with him. She said he made the first move by putting his hand down her pants. We fount and she said oh ill never do it again.

 

2004: she was having parties while i was working and gave a blowjob to a guy and started to have sex but someone walked in on them. ( she admitted this in 2007)

 

She called me while i was working midnights and told me to bring home milk and she was going to bed. I thought it was suspicious and went home to find her with my friend kissing...broke up with her but was miserable...so i pretty well begged for her back and she said i want you back just not right now and found out she gave a blowjob to another guy at a party. When I found this out she cried and changed her tune...we got back together.

 

2005: She turned 19 and started going to the bars screwed a guy outside the bar...she admitted this in 2007. Also she bought a web cam and was doing sexually related things with men online...i actually made a fake account and she told this fake person she hated me...while i was talking to her on msn and she was saying she was home doing nothing...she got pregnant again so we stayed together.

 

2006: she was going to the bars and i stayed home and watched the kids and she went to a hotel room and screwed an army guy. Also around this time she got fingered by some guy in the backseat of her friends car.

 

**During this time she denied it all...so in April 2007 I l;eft her and met someone else. She was pregant when i left her for bacy number 3. While I left her she said that she thought I would never leave her so to prove that she loves me and will change she'll write a list of all the things i never knew she did and admit them. In time after 3 months she said she never wants to feel that way again and we got back together.

 

In 2008: Unsure but she was accused of something.

 

Just as of late she had her friends 12 year old sister come stay here and pretty well had a live in babysitter and i was working alot of nights. So she could go out anytime. She was smoking marijuana every night and staying out until 3 am with her friends so she says. The house was filthy and the kids were dirty and the babysitter was just eating all the groceries so i told her the baby sitter had to go but she just kept being the same...I got in a fight with her and broke up with her against my will...and i hacked into her facebook and hotmail and saw she sent a picture of her tits to some dude I know...and that she wrote an ex boyfriend from high school and met up with him. I sent messages to both of these guys and they confirmed she called them and Matt the 2nd guy actually met up with her because she was threatening to kill herself. He has a gf too so i said unless he helps me do something ill tell her about it. I told katie i found out about these messages and she says i never wrote them someone else mustve pretended to be her...she swore on our childrens lives she never talked to them. SO Matt called her and he asked if i knew they met and that she wanted him to leave his gf for her ...she said no im clueless and will never find out. He asked her if she loved him and she said he is forever and always her heart and soul...he asked her if she loved me and she said she hated me ever since she met me and that she hopes i burn in hell...then he passed the phone to me and i said she really hurt me. She said she dont care anymore if i know...and then she told me today i do love you but you really hurt me...i was angry when i said those things...and she said she dont want me right now cause shes all messed up but she doesnt want me to be with anybody else either.

 

Now...believe it or not i still love her...WHY? Why do i love this girl why cant i move on and why do i think about everything shes done to me and why does she blame me and make herself look like the victim. Why does she want me if she does this to me. Any answer would be great but just dont call me stupid cause i know I am...

[boogieboy]

She wants to keep you so she has security while she gets to go out and play...cuz she knows you will get back with her again and again.

You wanna get some good revenge on her? Make her think you are seeing someone else. That will twist her up, and she deserves it.

 

How long do you plan to keep torturing yourself like this? If you keep going like this, it will take you another 10 years before you are able to take yourself away from her permanently.

[lostsunsets]

Run away from her. Don't talk to her except for the kids. She is a serial cheater of the worst order and will, absolutely, never change. Go find someone else while your young enough. She has cuckolded you on a regular basis. Damn, man she tells people she hates you. Time to man up.

[Madandsad]

and her and i have this mutual friend...more hers than mind...its a girl and shes having a birthday party friday night. I was invited too and katie said no youre not invitied she said you cant come...like one day before that i was invited. The friend told me katies gonna drink and when katie drinks watch out...ho time. I asked her about drinking and she said "maybe 1 or 2 thats it". Anyway that was last night...she stayed at her mothers and came here this morning and asked for a few cigarettes and wondered why i never called her back last night because "she wouldve came over"...its not my job to call her after she said i was begging for her back the last time...and for some reason now she says she wants me to go to that party to prove shes not up to anything...

 

sigh

[Madandsad]

I just feel like im the laugh of the town...theres 2500 people in this town if i did go to that party id feel like everyones laughing at me and i wouldnt know which guy who pretend to be frienbdly with me just because he had sex with her and i didnt know about it...but at the same time i wanna go...but maybe she taked to someone about me coming and its all a trick to make me believe something...i could be paranoid but ive been paranoid befor and found out alot...

[hendersongirl]

Gosh how horrible for you!

I know (to a lesser extent) how you feel, where you really love somebody and so stay with them through them treating you like crap.

I'm so sorry, since I am still with this guy (and he has changed over the past three years gradually and is now MUCH better) I have no real advice to you.

Just wanted to say I KNOW how you feel, and posting on here will help (but take the advice with a grain of salt because they do not know you nor her nor your relationship.

But yes, it seems to me, she should be history.

I went to a party this past weekend to keep an eye on my bf - had a totally awful time and got depressed and suicidal. Still better than sitting at home on your own for hours worried sick and picturing the worst possible things they could be doing.

But, none of this is healthy, in reality!!! Get some counselling, or take a trip on your own if you can, just for a few days. Clear your mind, and hopefully you will be able to see that life without her will not be so awful.

My love to you

[Madandsad]

Yeah boogieboy if i pretended i had another girlfriend ho would that affect her? Besides her probably thinking she deserved revenge...wht are your thoughtss cause I actually thought of making a fake woman on facebook and getting a pic somewhere and sending a relationship request...make it look like that just to let her know how it feels...

[stillafool]

I know that you know everyone here is going to tell you to BREAK UP WITH HER AND RUN FAST AND NEVER LOOK BACK!

 

She will never change. She is showing you who she is and will always be. My bio mother was like her and she is an old lady now and still doing the same thing she did to my dad back in her teens and 20's except her choices have dwindled.

 

You are probably in love with her because she provides good sex and a challenge to win her heart completely. She doesn't respect you because you keep taking her back when she treats you like an old rag. This is what makes her continue the way she does. It will never stop as long as you are with her as this is your pattern. I hate to sound negative but there is NOTHING you can do to make her stop. You have to leave and regain your self respect then find a woman who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Are the kids yours?

[EmptyPromises]

have you no self respect? this girl cheated on you not once SEVERAL times!! do u think you dont deserve better? save your dignity and your pride and move on from this selfish brat. she doesnt love you! if she loved you she wouldnt be cheating and things would be much different. youve already WASTED 9 years on her. it didnt work. and it wont ever work. MOVE THE EFF ON!

[utterer of lies]

..katie...wtf

 

First thing - get a DNA test for all children, to see if you are really their father.

[Vet]

I have been with Katie for almost 9 years since 2001. I am 27 and she is 23 now. We met young and we have 3 children. Katie had a reputation when I met her she was with many men but I fell in love with her and thought she loved me too. Throughout our lives she has cheated on me it always seems around the same time of the year too between august-november for some reason. to break it down ill place years and the things she done along with the excuses after. And these are only instances I know of for sure.

 

2001: Found a note she wrote to her ex boyfriend and she said it was a joke...

 

2002: She was with another girl sexually...

 

2003: My brother was staying with us and while I was working she was having sex with him. She said he made the first move by putting his hand down her pants. We fount and she said oh ill never do it again.

 

2004: she was having parties while i was working and gave a blowjob to a guy and started to have sex but someone walked in on them. ( she admitted this in 2007)

 

She called me while i was working midnights and told me to bring home milk and she was going to bed. I thought it was suspicious and went home to find her with my friend kissing...broke up with her but was miserable...so i pretty well begged for her back and she said i want you back just not right now and found out she gave a blowjob to another guy at a party. When I found this out she cried and changed her tune...we got back together.

 

2005: She turned 19 and started going to the bars screwed a guy outside the bar...she admitted this in 2007. Also she bought a web cam and was doing sexually related things with men online...i actually made a fake account and she told this fake person she hated me...while i was talking to her on msn and she was saying she was home doing nothing...she got pregnant again so we stayed together.

 

2006: she was going to the bars and i stayed home and watched the kids and she went to a hotel room and screwed an army guy. Also around this time she got fingered by some guy in the backseat of her friends car.

 

**During this time she denied it all...so in April 2007 I l;eft her and met someone else. She was pregant when i left her for bacy number 3. While I left her she said that she thought I would never leave her so to prove that she loves me and will change she'll write a list of all the things i never knew she did and admit them. In time after 3 months she said she never wants to feel that way again and we got back together.

 

In 2008: Unsure but she was accused of something.

 

Just as of late she had her friends 12 year old sister come stay here and pretty well had a live in babysitter and i was working alot of nights. So she could go out anytime. She was smoking marijuana every night and staying out until 3 am with her friends so she says. The house was filthy and the kids were dirty and the babysitter was just eating all the groceries so i told her the baby sitter had to go but she just kept being the same...I got in a fight with her and broke up with her against my will...and i hacked into her facebook and hotmail and saw she sent a picture of her tits to some dude I know...and that she wrote an ex boyfriend from high school and met up with him. I sent messages to both of these guys and they confirmed she called them and Matt the 2nd guy actually met up with her because she was threatening to kill herself. He has a gf too so i said unless he helps me do something ill tell her about it. I told katie i found out about these messages and she says i never wrote them someone else mustve pretended to be her...she swore on our childrens lives she never talked to them. SO Matt called her and he asked if i knew they met and that she wanted him to leave his gf for her ...she said no im clueless and will never find out. He asked her if she loved him and she said he is forever and always her heart and soul...he asked her if she loved me and she said she hated me ever since she met me and that she hopes i burn in hell...then he passed the phone to me and i said she really hurt me. She said she dont care anymore if i know...and then she told me today i do love you but you really hurt me...i was angry when i said those things...and she said she dont want me right now cause shes all messed up but she doesnt want me to be with anybody else either.

 

Now...believe it or not i still love her...WHY? Why do i love this girl why cant i move on and why do i think about everything shes done to me and why does she blame me and make herself look like the victim. Why does she want me if she does this to me. Any answer would be great but just dont call me stupid cause i know I am...

 

What did you expect getting together with a 15-year-old? You locked her down before she was done growing obviously (moved in with her at 17?). You're a doormat and she not only knows it, but takes full advantage of it. Now you've brought three kids into it (utterer of lies is right though--get a DNA test), so you need to stop and think about them too. Even if they aren't yours biologically, you are still their father, right? Bottom line: your relationship dynamic is set in stone; you're always going to be the dupe, and she's always going to be running around on you because she doesn't respect you. If you stay together for the kids, they're going to be raised in a volatile environment where Mom's always running around and Dad's depressed and angry. Think about their best interests and yours.

[boogieboy]

Yeah boogieboy if i pretended i had another girlfriend ho would that affect her? Besides her probably thinking she deserved revenge...wht are your thoughtss cause I actually thought of making a fake woman on facebook and getting a pic somewhere and sending a relationship request...make it look like that just to let her know how it feels...

 

Dont make a fake anything. Talk to real women. Your relationship is over anyway, go get a new girlfriend. Talk to a few women at the party. Do Something that doesnt involve her.

[likeORIGAMI]

I can't believe what I just read..

[Brady_to_Moss]

Okay.....i dont know......wow.....if you have ANY self respect..you HAVE to leave her ASAP..never contact again....she is making your life hell.

[lostsunsets]

Madandsad, do you want to prove something? If you do, tell her that you don't want to go to the party. Let her go alone. Wait two or three hours and then show up. You will most likely catch her with someone. If you do, maybe that will slap you back into constiousness. And allow you to see her for the the cheating ho she is.

[harmfulsweetz]

I'm going to be honest here, you need to leave her. I've done bad things, ok one bad thing, but not a long list. Forgive one mistake, not the whole line of them. She's doing it because she knows you will be there at the end of the day, once the drink dries up, and the party ends, you will still be there. Do you want to play second fiddle to her other escapades? Do you actually want to raise three children in an environment where mommy and daddy don't trust each other?

You've got to start looking out for yourself, you love her, maybe so, but she doesn't love you. Her actions are milked with hatred, maybe she's undecided, maybe she does need space. But are you prepared to wait around forever for her? You already know what she's capable of.

However, I have to agree with Vet. She was so young when you got with her, she's still four years younger than you. She didn't know herself at that time, what she wants, what she needs, who she actually is. The stages people need to go through to grow up and be ready for a proper relationship are dating, having loads of fun, dating and then seeing whose right. You must try the clothes on before you know the fit, right? That could go for both of you. Get a DNA test, leave her, be the best father you can be (and if she's an unfit mother, fight for custody) and hopefully you can create an environment which is civil and harmonious to bring your children up in.

One day you will meet someone who won't do those things. Who will show you respect, and love, and devotion. However, you won't get anywhere allowing her to treat you like a fool.

[borbiusle]

Get a DNA test, then sort your mess out.

[stillafool]

Well I guess OP isn't coming back to talk. This always happens when we don't give them the answers they want. In this particular case I think OP wanted us to tell him how to get her back.

[Teslacoil]

I think the OP should get in touch with the Dr. Phil show, try to make a bunch of money by dragging her on and making an appearance, and then promptly break up with her.

 

Seriously is this for real? How do you end up having 3 kids in a relationship like this?

[stepka]

This is a crazy story, but I don't agree with the advice to get a DNA test. What will it prove? You're the only stable parent these kids have and would you just walk away from them if they turn out to not be yours? They need you man. The real problem here is that some or none of them may be yours and you should be getting custody of them b/c mom is a flake, but may not be able to do so if they're not yours.

[Javelin]

How do you know that these 3 children are even yours?

[fooled once]

You started screwing a girl when she was 14/15 years old? Where are her parents? How come they didn't have you arrested for statutory rape?

 

is this even a real post?

 

Those poor kids. The total dysfunction. CPS should come and take them since neither of the 'adults' in this home seem to give a **** about them.

 

The mother is a trashy whore. The 'father' is pathetic and weak because he knows how much this immature girl cheats on him, lies to him, doesn't take care of the children, yet he "loves her"

 

How about loving those kids more? How about taking care of THEIR needs instead of your own?

[butcher's hook]

At 14 she had a reputation of being with many men?

 

This can't even be real! you were 18 and she was 14 when you started dating?

[fakobako]

WOWWW. and i thought i was bad. ive only cheated on my BF one time each, and than got into a relationship with that person i cheated on them with. thats bad, doesnt seem like she cares and wont stop

[harmfulsweetz]

Jesus, that does actually sound bad. I mean, put in those terms it makes him as bad as her.