Bob Posted November 17, 2003 Share Posted November 17, 2003 We split up 3 months ago, but we have always had an on and off thing between each other. I really like her and well... I always thought she was the one. This time however I was getting annoyed about getting messed about, we would go out for a few months then she would go off with someone else, and maybe 6 months later come back and tell me how much she missed me. I really have a lot of love for this girl but I don't want to be messed around like that. So I decided not to speak to her, keep my distance and go our separate ways. I kept her on my MSN list, just for those times when I would miss her, it would have been rather rude to just block her as we have been friends for quite a few years. Last week, we were having a chat, fairly light hearted joking around and she brings up the topic of one of my friends asking her about us. I told her I disliked when people asked me about her and I wished people would stop it. She took this badly and asked if I was over her. I said yes , even though I'm not. She told me she wasn't. She has a new boyfriend, I really do love this girl and it is making me unhappy not being with her, yet I feel that if I do tell her this it will distance us. I'm lost J Link to post Share on other sites
MIKEY Posted November 17, 2003 Share Posted November 17, 2003 Hey bro--You did the right thing. Unfortunetly it is a game and you played it to perfection. You have make it known that you are over her. It seems that she is still holding on to you because of the love you gave her. The moment you take that away she starts to miss it. I am going through the same thing. We get togehter, she nbreaks up and dates others, that doesnt work out and she comes back. These girls have developed a comfortable pattern with that. Break that pattern. if she truly loves you she will find a way back to you and will prove it--but make it hard on her--she has for you! Link to post Share on other sites
Vivid_29 Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 Like the previous poster said, you did the right thing. Even though we are hurting, we sometimes have to hide behind a smile. Hang in there -- Link to post Share on other sites
tredulce Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 You need to tell herhow you feel, I think, just for honesty's sake. But, just because you're not over her does not mean you should get back together with her. She is playing with you, and no one deserves that. People can care for eachother and not be able to make something work. Even if something doesn't work now...if she learns she can't mess with you, something may work later. But, you have to stand firm and stand up for yourself. You need to come first. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bob Posted November 18, 2003 Author Share Posted November 18, 2003 Thank you for your advice. I may let it all calm down a little bit before I tell her how I feel. I'm not sure what to say . J Link to post Share on other sites
trying Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 follow your heart listen to your feelings let her know how her push/pull come here/go away behaviour is hurting you...and find out is she is willing to work on it she may not mean to, but she is playing head games...and if she keeps it up, you are going to end up really messed up over this girl you deserve to be treated with love and respect you are not a yo-yo Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted November 18, 2003 Share Posted November 18, 2003 Why would you want to rekindle a relationship with someone who apparently only wants you when she isn't seeing someone else? I think a relationship requires all or nothing. If someone isn't prepared to give all....then you are stuck accepting whatever crap they decide to share with you. It's demeaning. I would take the high road and keep my distance. If she is interested in starting over with you....I'd begin with setting new boundaries. You made the right choice originally. Stick to your guns. Link to post Share on other sites
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