Grace1973 Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 I have been keeping in online contact with an old crush after he got in touch with me after twenty years. I still have that crush! lol We've decided to meet up but for one (genuine) reason or another it's not happened just yet. But we've swapped numbers in case one of us is late on the day or whatever. Would he think me too forward if I SMS now and then in a "hey how are ya" kind of way? He's shy, so I don't want to jeopardise our friendship before it's really got going again and I'm kind of hoping things will develop this time round. Sorry if this sounds lame but it's important to me! Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 no, i'd wait until he makes the next contact... it may appear overly anxious if you text first. or just wait until the day you have set up. Link to post Share on other sites
oysterman Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 From a guy's perspective, I would want you to SMS me...he may well be holding back to avoid potential rejection. This is the 21st century...women can make the first move just like guys. I bet he replies right away when you do. Link to post Share on other sites
Thaddeus Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 It's not lame at all. By all means, get in contact. Preferably not texting though. Just call the guy already. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grace1973 Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 Thanks guys. I'm so scared of ruining things before we've even had a chance to meet up (in a couple of weeks), but I just want him to know I'm thinking about him - without scaring him off lol He has given me a number of clues that he likes me too, and the almost perfect timing of his first contact with me totally out of the blue after all these years could have been fate. We'll just have to wait and see! Link to post Share on other sites
Thaddeus Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 the almost perfect timing of his first contact with me totally out of the blue after all these years could have been fate. We'll just have to wait and see!OK, hold on a second here. You're about to fall into a trap that I've seen over and over and over again. "Fate" or whatever doesn't enter into it. If you wait for "the universe" (or whatever) to just present you with opportunities, and if you don't take action to follow up on them, you'll be sorely disappointed. You cannot rely on "fate" (there isn't any such thing anyway) to simply drop things into your lap. You will have to take action. It is fantasy to believe, "it's meant to be" or "it just wasn't meant to be." The universe cares not one minor whit about your romantic life. It's not up to the universe, it's not up to fate. It's up to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grace1973 Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 All I meant was that I've never forgotten him and have wondered where he was / what he was up to. I'd always regretted not trying to make a go of things with him first time round - all my friends said we were an ideal match, but I think we were both too shy to do anything about it. He got in touch just as I was over the break up of a long relationship and ready to date again. I'm (obviously) now more grown up and realise that life's too short for what if...?'s so am more likely to suggest we date if he seems receptive to the idea when we meet. At least then I'll know one way or t'other! Link to post Share on other sites
Thaddeus Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 OK, *whew* *wipes brow* I didn't take you for one to believe in fantasy-land thinking, which was why I was more than a bit surprised when I read that bit about fate. Glad to see you simply used it as a figure of speech, and not as some sort of deluded expectation that the universe will simply drop stuff into your lap. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grace1973 Posted August 30, 2009 Author Share Posted August 30, 2009 OK, *whew* *wipes brow* I didn't take you for one to believe in fantasy-land thinking, which was why I was more than a bit surprised when I read that bit about fate. Glad to see you simply used it as a figure of speech, and not as some sort of deluded expectation that the universe will simply drop stuff into your lap. Good luck! Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
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