TaraMaiden Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 just to continue the discussion, if you want to.... how have you managed to get the situation 'under control', now? Link to post Share on other sites
Author jasminetea Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 I've remained the adult in the relationship. I am not asking for her forgiveness nor am I reacting in a childlike fashion to her goading. I feel that Taramere was right about my mother wishing to retain the old status quo and as a result she is unable to talk to be adult to adult about this or any other situation where we may clash. This situation has had a completely unforeseen consequence. It has made em realise that my mother has often disregarded my feelings, needs and opinions. I believe that this has contributed to me feeling inadequate and insecure. I have largely believed my needs are unimportant. Whilst I don't blame her for treating me this way, her disregard of me combined with her inability to treat me as an adult means she has lost credibility with me and her opinions about me now hold far less weight than they have in the past, I have all of a sudden become far more self-reliant. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Well done. May you continue to grow and flourish under your own steam. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jasminetea Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 I hope that wasn't as patronising at it reads Thanks anyway Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 no, I'm sorry if it came across that way. I meant it in all goodwill. It's something extremely difficult, to emerge from a behaviour pattern of this kind, and I am very pleased for you that the experience gave you food for thought, and a motivation to realise and act upon the conclusions. all kudos to taramere (there really is no connection, by the way! ) for having provided such an effective bouncing board for you. I'm glad for you, I really am. Link to post Share on other sites
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