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Yet another guy stuck in a sexless marriage


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So back to my full body massage. The girl doing that was very focused on giving me a killer massage. And teasing me as well. Yes I was paying her. So what. I could tell she wanted to please me and that felt nice.

 

Um, she wanted to "trick" more money out of you. She could care less about you as a person, sex partner, or anything else about you other than your ability to give her more cash. Does that really feel "nice" to you? Or is the motivation irrelevant, as long as you get yours?

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No offense ma'am, but what you're talkin' about is dressing up a mule. I can take my best bridle, harness, and strap in on my mule, it don't make it my prize pony. Na. If a man can't get a woman to come to him and love her right he's got no business playing a stud with a filly for hire.

 

I'm sure you're an interesting lady and mean no offense, but I call it like I see it.

 

Are you a man or a woman?

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A real man is takin' care of business with the woman he's got. If he can't satisfy his own I'd say that's on him. Last thing he needs to be thinkin' about is taking care of some other filly if he can't feed and exercise the one he has.

 

As for paying? That's for guys who don't know what they're doin.

 

Interesting language for a newbie here. Maybe real men try to find solutions that work for his filly that is not allowing him to ride. First he investigates if the filly is sick or hurt. Then he investigates if it is something else. And an interesting point...perhaps some guys need to practice how to better ride the filly they have. And when the filly they have is not allowing any riders, then it is best if the cowboy practices on a filly that will allow him to ride so he can master the filly he has. ;)

 

Um, she wanted to "trick" more money out of you. She could care less about you as a person, sex partner, or anything else about you other than your ability to give her more cash. Does that really feel "nice" to you? Or is the motivation irrelevant, as long as you get yours?

 

Actually, by your logic...waitresses only do their job for money and not for any other satisfaction, nurses only do their job for money and not for helping patients get better, hair stylists only do their job for money and not to make their customers look good, and on and on it goes. We all do our jobs for money, but that does not mean that we do not want to do our best and please our customers.

 

Are you a man or a woman?

 

Methinks this poster has been one of us for a whole lot longer than today. :D

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Toodamnpragmatic
goodness, 14 pages of men defending their needs to cheat.

 

I've said this so many times, the #1 reason women turn off from their husbands is because their husbands are a turn-off. Instead of looking for easy sex, why not use that energy to re-invent yourself so your wives want to jump your bones.

 

Women are turned on through their brains, don't ya know!

 

 

So f'ing typical.... Not at all what this post was about, though there has been a shift of late. And then the usual response from a female blaming the male, claiming we are a turnoff and not doing enough to stimulate her between the ears... You know nothing about these situations, just conjecture because whether it was his fault or you just grew tired of your husband/boyfriend you then paint everyone with the same brush.....

 

Old and tired.....:mad:

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Actually, by your logic...waitresses only do their job for money and not for any other satisfaction, nurses only do their job for money and not for helping patients get better, hair stylists only do their job for money and not to make their customers look good, and on and on it goes. We all do our jobs for money, but that does not mean that we do not want to do our best and please our customers.

 

Actually, there is a fundamental flaw in YOUR logic. Most of us CHOOSE to be waitresses, nurses, hair stylists, etc., because we have an interest in it or a bent for it. On the other hand, most prostitutes do not enter that profession because they CHOOSE it. They are forced into it due to abuse, destitution, and other horrible life experiences. If they had their druthers (or knew any better), most women would never choose to be a prostitute.

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But I still love ya honey!! :lmao::lmao: I especially agree with something you said at the beginning of this thread:

 

To me it is unfair of a wife or husband to refuse sex to his or her partner while at the same time demanding fidelity.
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Actually, there is a fundamental flaw in YOUR logic. Most of us CHOOSE to be waitresses, nurses, hair stylists, etc., because we have an interest in it or a bent for it. On the other hand, most prostitutes do not enter that profession because they CHOOSE it. They are forced into it due to abuse, destitution, and other horrible life experiences. If they had their druthers (or knew any better), most women would never choose to be a prostitute.

 

If you refer to streetwalkers and Asian massage "therapists, then yes. However, this does not apply to many of the higher paying escorts. As for most waitresses and other professions choosing what they want out of interest, this does not mean they are good at what they do. If I choose to be a nurse, then it does not mean I will be good at it. In fact, I won't. But yet I may stay in that profession because it pays very well and has great benefits.

 

But I still love ya honey!! :lmao::lmao: I especially agree with something you said at the beginning of this thread:

 

Thank you. Sometimes I say the right thing. :)

 

Na. You can't learn about one filly from another. Anyone working with horses knows that one isn't the same as the other. What works for one horse doesn't work for another. That's just how it is.

 

 

So....I cannot learn how to ride better by learning on a different horse? Then why do they have riding stables for those who need to ride? :eek:

 

Practicing on a different filly may not be the same, but a rider can learn many new techniques which will help him be a better rider on his own filly. Then his filly will appreciate his techniques and allow him to ride.

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Marriage is a process of "breaking each other in" - a bit like horses. But the man - if he lets his wife totally break him in, totally civilize him, he loses his edgy masculinity and with it a LOT of his sex appeal. Now I agree there are women can love and have sex with a totally tamed stallion, but a lot won't.

 

I still like and am good at conflict. With wife - with people in business - sometimes with strangers. I don't mean violence though if it comes to that - ok (never, ever, never ever violent with wife). I mean conflict. And I think that is a big - quiet - unspoken - turn on - to my wife. And I think it is/would be to almost any woman.

 

 

 

 

Na. You can't learn about one filly from another. Anyone working with horses knows that one isn't the same as the other. What works for one horse doesn't work for another. That's just how it is.

 

Same as women. I have a ranch full of ponies. But there's one I ride. And there ain't nothing like it.

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Man cannot get sex from their wives could be these reasons:?

 

1. Don't understand his wife's love languages

 

2. Ignore her emotional needs, skip kiss goodbye, and skip caring about her, but want straightly go to bed have sex with her, women hate that

 

3. No healthy boundaries, yes, marriage need boundaries as well

 

4. Lack of honesty, don't know how to express negative things and feelings, means lacking of intimacy

 

5. not good at communication

 

this is what I can think of now. If you cannot get close to her heart, it is difficult to get close to her body

 

If you start with another woman, one day you will have to face same challenges, if you indulge in porn, you will become more lousy at communication at intimacy, plus isolate yourself in a delusion. The best solution is to work harder on your marriage, and grow yourself it seems

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So f'ing typical.... Not at all what this post was about, though there has been a shift of late. And then the usual response from a female blaming the male, claiming we are a turnoff and not doing enough to stimulate her between the ears... You know nothing about these situations, just conjecture because whether it was his fault or you just grew tired of your husband/boyfriend you then paint everyone with the same brush.....

 

Old and tired.....:mad:

 

Yeah, I'm in my mid 40 and have had 3 long term relationships, I know NOTHING about these situations!

 

Sorry to bruise your ego with what is the truth.

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Man cannot get sex from their wives could be these reasons:?

 

1. Don't understand his wife's love languages

 

2. Ignore her emotional needs, skip kiss goodbye, and skip caring about her, but want straightly go to bed have sex with her, women hate that

 

3. No healthy boundaries, yes, marriage need boundaries as well

 

4. Lack of honesty, don't know how to express negative things and feelings, means lacking of intimacy

 

5. not good at communication

 

this is what I can think of now. If you cannot get close to her heart, it is difficult to get close to her body

 

If you start with another woman, one day you will have to face same challenges, if you indulge in porn, you will become more lousy at communication at intimacy, plus isolate yourself in a delusion. The best solution is to work harder on your marriage, and grow yourself it seems

 

Great post. But again, this post will fall on deaf ears.

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The best solution is to work harder on your marriage, and grow yourself it seems

 

 

The best solution is getting a divorce... and surely, what you just mentioned can be applied to women as well? Ah, yes, sorry... we - men - are the problem, because we want sex... forgot that! :rolleyes:

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Toodamnpragmatic
The best solution is getting a divorce... and surely, what you just mentioned can be applied to women as well? Ah, yes, sorry... we - men - are the problem, because we want sex... forgot that! :rolleyes:

 

 

Remember we are the enemy and do very little right. The list truly does apply too to women and there can be extra points added there too. But let's not degenerate to that.

 

We already know all our faults and told so over and over.

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Yeah, I'm in my mid 40 and have had 3 long term relationships, I know NOTHING about these situations!

 

When I read this, it reminded me of the man who said, "I am an expert at how to quit smoking. I have done it many times." :lmao:

 

 

 

Sorry to bruise your ego with what is the truth.

 

Actually, THAT was an opinion. ;)

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Maybe the best solution is threatening to cheat. It actually worked for my friend and turned around his marriage almost overnight. With these type of women the more you try to please them and satisfy their needs the more resentfu and cold they become towards you. I am all about getting results and doing what works and this is what seems to work.

 

I am well aware that prostitutes only care about the money but there is nothing wrong with that. If a man knows exactly what he is getting he can pay his fair and get a quick thrill.

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Man cannot get sex from their wives could be these reasons:?

 

1. Don't understand his wife's love languages

 

2. Ignore her emotional needs, skip kiss goodbye, and skip caring about her, but want straightly go to bed have sex with her, women hate that

 

3. No healthy boundaries, yes, marriage need boundaries as well

 

4. Lack of honesty, don't know how to express negative things and feelings, means lacking of intimacy

 

5. not good at communication

 

this is what I can think of now. If you cannot get close to her heart, it is difficult to get close to her body

 

 

I don't know about some of the other posters here- but this is not true in Jame's case. He's been here a long time and there are numerous posts by him on this subject.

 

Honestly, sometimes a man can try everything and it doesn't work.

 

It's totally unfair to refuse your partner sex and expect them to be faithful.

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Men don't please a woman by washing dishes and ironing clothes. I work hard to give my woman everything she wants. I provide. I don't ask my woman to provide. If she wants to spend 7 days a week going shopping or hanging around a spa (or whatever it is women like to do) I'm only too happy to see her do it. She needs more, I get her more. Cause I love her. On my ranch the mares follow the strong stallion and that is who they want to mate with. Weaker stallions don't get a shake. Natural order. You guys paying for it or thinkin' about paying for it gotta feel real bad about yourself as a man.

 

 

Wow.. just WOW!!! :lmao::rolleyes:

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Toodamnpragmatic
Ma'am, did I say something funny?

 

I found it funny.... Welcome to the 1700's..... Yes I too compare my wife to a mare and obviously I am a mule by these standards....

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Men don't please a woman by washing dishes and ironing clothes. I work hard to give my woman everything she wants. I provide. I don't ask my woman to provide. If she wants to spend 7 days a week going shopping or hanging around a spa (or whatever it is women like to do) I'm only too happy to see her do it. She needs more, I get her more. Cause I love her. On my ranch the mares follow the strong stallion and that is who they want to mate with. Weaker stallions don't get a shake. Natural order. You guys paying for it or thinkin' about paying for it gotta feel real bad about yourself as a man.

 

Touche! :laugh:

 

:rolleyes:

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Men don't please a woman by washing dishes and ironing clothes.

 

Care to expand ? What if her top need is domestic support from her husband ? difficult to grasp that a woman is turned off by her husband helping her with the chores....

 

Love to hear from women on this too.

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Glacier's tone might have come across as a little harsh, but he's got a point. The sense I get is that he's talking about alpha characteristics, those same characteristics that women tend to be drawn toward.

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Part of what makes me attracted to a man who IS one who can help with the chores. Help with dishes, laundry or whatever. This is anit the 50's where you got to work and thats all you think you are expected to do. You can do your share. If a man thinks he can provide money wise and do nothing else and expect some lovin while they do nothing else to help, then they can be single. I have no problem giving my man sex whenever, but you better know they gonna tow the line too. Its about give and take in my book. Not give give and give while the other one takes and takes.

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Men don't please a woman by washing dishes and ironing clothes. I work hard to give my woman everything she wants. I provide. I don't ask my woman to provide. If she wants to spend 7 days a week going shopping or hanging around a spa (or whatever it is women like to do) I'm only too happy to see her do it. She needs more, I get her more. Cause I love her. On my ranch the mares follow the strong stallion and that is who they want to mate with. Weaker stallions don't get a shake. Natural order. You guys paying for it or thinkin' about paying for it gotta feel real bad about yourself as a man.

 

 

Do you feel if you didn't work hard, to provide for your woman and give her whats she wants/needs, that she would leave you? I think its quite admirable of you to bust your butt, however, you shouldn't have to work so hard at something that should be 50/50.

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No I provide for her because I love her. No woman should have to worry about supporting themselves and their man. If I had to send my woman to work to pick up my slack I'd take myself out back. If she wants to work that's fine with me. But she doesn't need to. I provide. She doesn't have to do dishes. If she wants to she can. Up to her. She don't have to work to provide for me and she don't ask me to put on a skirt. That's our 50/50. I'm man she's woman.

 

 

I understand what you're saying, and people have to do what works best for them.

 

As far as no woman should have to worry about supporting herself and her man, well you're right, thats why I wont, and he can do his share of things too. I have no problem working and doing some chores etc, just like the man in my life shouldn't either.

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GorillaTheater
She doesn't have to do dishes. If she wants to she can. Up to her.

 

You let your mare get away with this crap?? Not in my corral, buddy.

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