wierdmunky Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 I'm so nervous, an old high school friend of mine just asked me out on a date, and after thinking about it for 3 days, I finally said yes. I just have this feeling that I'm going to fall for him fast, and I don't want that to happen! I don't want to let things get ruined by falling into how great things could be, and how I ideally see us possibly dating, and all too fast without thinking. At the same time, I also think I'm not good enough for him, hes finishing up law, and I'm just starting as a junior...I get nervous in social situations and usually end up having a drink to loosen up a little, and that became a problem for me before. I try not to drink at all, remember to be myself, and know that I don't need the alcohol. I seriously can't relax right now, but I'm excited at the same time. I feel like I don't even know how to date! I know I shouldn't worry, I just don't want to mess up a really good night over thinking it. We get along already, but we haven't seen each other in years. We just recently started going out for lunch, coffee, movies. I don't know what I'm doing, I want to enjoy the spontaneity, but past relationships leave me apprehensive about moving forward. Link to post Share on other sites
tamarachick Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 All I can say is that I have been through the exact same experience as you recently. I met up with someone I knew in highschool and we kind of became friends and then he asked me on a date. We have since been on a couple more but I am still not really much the wiser!...All I can say is try to relax and enjoy it and most importantly be yourself. If he doens't like you for yourself then it would never work so just be you. Maybe psyche yourself up beforehand think of a few times lately when people have complimented you or said something to make you feel good just to boost your confidence a bit. Wear something you feel comfortable in, or buy something new that makes you feel fab! Leave enough time to get ready, play your favourite uplifting music while you're getting ready. When you're with him, make lots of eye contact, be interested in what he is saying... ask lots of questions but don't grill him! Just enjoy being with him and getting Most importantly try to remember to enjoy it - it's such an exciting part of a new relationship (and a bit traumatic!), relish it and remember he asked YOU out on a date - he wants to be with YOU - and why shouldn't he! I hope this helps a bit - let us know how it goes Link to post Share on other sites
Author wierdmunky Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 All I can say is that I have been through the exact same experience as you recently. I met up with someone I knew in highschool and we kind of became friends and then he asked me on a date. We have since been on a couple more but I am still not really much the wiser!...All I can say is try to relax and enjoy it and most importantly be yourself. If he doens't like you for yourself then it would never work so just be you. Maybe psyche yourself up beforehand think of a few times lately when people have complimented you or said something to make you feel good just to boost your confidence a bit. Wear something you feel comfortable in, or buy something new that makes you feel fab! Leave enough time to get ready, play your favourite uplifting music while you're getting ready. When you're with him, make lots of eye contact, be interested in what he is saying... ask lots of questions but don't grill him! Just enjoy being with him and getting Most importantly try to remember to enjoy it - it's such an exciting part of a new relationship (and a bit traumatic!), relish it and remember he asked YOU out on a date - he wants to be with YOU - and why shouldn't he! I hope this helps a bit - let us know how it goes Thanks for the reply! And well the date went pretty smoothly except that I slipped and almost fell on our way out which was really embarrassing : 0 ,and before we left, I tripped over our dog "fence" that keeps him out of the living room, which was equally embarrassing, ((sigh)) .. Laughing was the only recovery I could think of, and I'm not sure how I looked to him.. Damn my super cute shoes. We went out to a Italian restaurant, had a couple drinks while we waited for our table, and had a nice conversation about stuff that's happened since we last saw each other again, and went to see a movie after wards He's really a great guy, but I'm too caught up with anxieties to be myself! He invited me out for 2 more dates, and I'm possibly thinking about calling everything off bc of that. I don't want to look like a wierdo to his friends because I'm being shy and don't know how to be/act. I'm scared of being more open, and want to be perfect all the time (which is unattainable) so I'm not sure, I have 3 days to cancel.. Link to post Share on other sites
Yukikazi Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Just try to keep it between the 2 of you for awhile before bringing friends into the mix... My ex was really shy also and even after 2 months had never met any of my friends... Link to post Share on other sites
whiteberry Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Just tell yourself to don't be nervous. Do a make-over for you to gain self confidence and lessen your nervous. Link to post Share on other sites
Beefy88 Posted October 9, 2009 Share Posted October 9, 2009 (edited) Why should you be nervous about being yourself? Every person is beautiful in his own way, always remember that. I admit that I used to be really shy too, but there's no need to. Don't be scared about the future, just ease up and let everything go by itselve. Do your thing, if you want to date him, date him, if you don't want to then don't. From what I read you should go on another date with him en enjoy it. Seems like you enjoyed the first one, then why not enjoy what's going to come next? Also, thinking about the past is something you shouldn't do. You know who you are and what you want in a relationship. If it goes further and you start talking about things like that, let him know who you are and what you are looking for. Don't be scared to fall in love! And remember, that no one is perfect. Don't try to be something you're not, this will never work out. Seeing as he already asked you out for another date, he really enjoys spending time with you. Btw, when I'm on a date with a girl, and she trips or does something that makes her feel embarassed, I find it quite cute! Edited October 9, 2009 by Beefy88 Link to post Share on other sites
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