wildfire7698 Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 Ok most of you know the story, for those who don't I will spare you all the long story just this time. To make that long story short, things between me and my guy have been uncertain from the beginning, his new job takes most of his time, his new shifts are horrible. We have basically no time together, I go to school during the day when he's home and when I am at home, he's working. So our schedules couldn't clash any worse. From that, other issues came about, one being me not feeling like I am any kind of a priority towards him anymore. He and I have worked on somethings and some of the things we are still working on. Well he just had a birthday a few days ago, I didn't get to spend it with him because he had to work, his boss wouldn't give him the day off. I was angry, I sent him a nasty email. I was hurt at the time, he knew I had been planning to do something special for him for the last 2 months. I thought with the recent problems that he simply hadn't tried hard enough. I haven't got a response from him and its been 3 days ago. Last night, I was thinking about him and just things at random. While things haven't been the best, there have been some really great times too. I decided to do something kinda special for him. I took his presents which were in a gift bag, I took it down to where he worked. Luckily, he parks his car in the back so he didn't see me plant the gift on his car. I pulled around the building and 3 people who worked there were outside taking a smoke break. Rather than looking like a prowler, I recruited one of them to help me. I gave him the bag and told him to tie it to his car. The guy took it over there and put it on his hood, and kind of tied it to the windshield wiper. I told all three of them not to tell him, that I wanted my guy to see it when he comes out at the end of his shift, that I wanted it to be a surprise. Well my guy is kind of shy and I really hope those guys didn't go back in and spill the beans to him or worse make fun of him...he would die. I hope they did as they promised and let it all be a surprise like I wanted. Here's the thing I wanted it all to be a nice gesture and a good surprise. He said no one has ever done anything really special for him for a birthday so that's why I did that. I was expecting to hear from him last night (when the plan was carried out) but I didn't. You don't think he is mad at me for doing that do you? I am worried now, cause I really expected to hear from him after work. Surely, he would see it for what it was, a nice gesture right? Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 it was a nice jesture, and he is probably just pissed still. try actually CALLING him and apolizing. tell him what you said about the really good moments. i am sure it sucks that he cannot see you too. call and talk about it, tell him how much you miss him. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 there are two possibilities: (1) he never got the gift because it'd been removed from his vehicle before he could get it or (2) he's trying to figure out what the heck's going on inside your head. a passive-aggressive gift is worse than none at all ... Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 plus it is a new job. maybe he couldn't get off. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 probably the best thing to do is to talk to him -- explain that you were frustrated, and thus got angry at him, for your plans to celebrate his birthday getting boogered up. I think often, when we get angry or say things in the heat of an argument, those are the words that make the biggest imprint on another person's mind. They (well, really "we") don't think beyond those hurtful things and remember the caring or love that's there ... Link to post Share on other sites
DAMIAN84 Posted November 19, 2003 Share Posted November 19, 2003 I think what you did is kinda creepy - If my girl did that I;d be FREAKED by her going and getting to know all those people in my space. Link to post Share on other sites
Author wildfire7698 Posted November 20, 2003 Author Share Posted November 20, 2003 That's where I got the idea. Plus, many of my friends said it was a sweet idea and told me to do it. So I did....I didn't want to be creepy. I just wanted to do something sweet for him. I didn't sit there and chat with anyone. I didn't do an introduction or anything like that with those guys. All I wanted to happen was he come out after his shift was over and find it himself, open it, and be touched by the gesture. But by what you said I am going to worry.... Link to post Share on other sites
tattoomytoe Posted November 20, 2003 Share Posted November 20, 2003 what about all th epositiv effed back you got back? why not concentrate on how nice it was...and if doesn't think so, then maybe he isn't the right match. Link to post Share on other sites
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