Update!!!

[coliflower]

Hi, i previously posted this, my ex and i were together for 4 years and engaged to be married next year

 

One day i checked my ex's phone ( i know i shouldnt have) and i found a message which was under a boys name in his phone but it was the same intials and a shortened version of my friends name, if that makes sense.

 

We all work together and the message was something along the lines of how that person would rather move than have their heart broken when i pass you on the stairs or see you with her. i didnt say anything to him about it at the time.

 

A few weeks went by and i checked the phone again and found another message from this same boys name saying that she had a fight with her husband ( the text mentioned the name of my my friends husband who i suspected the first text had come from) and i need you. I know that my friend and her husband were having problems as she had told me.

 

I ended up confronting him and he swore blind nothing was going on and he even went back and told my friend who also told me there was nothing going on. I was pretty embarassed and ended up taking their word for it.

 

Again a few weeks later i checked again and found a message saying you can come round coz my husband is out. Me and ex had big row over this and he phoned my friend in front of me and told he and she said that the text was meant for her brother as he and her husband dont get on.

 

Since then we have split and i am still in the house we share whilst sorting a place to live and the other night the ex was drunk so i checked the phone and found a message from her under her own name saying 'babe i know its hard but dont text me from home'

 

Since then i have found my own place and have only just got internet back. Just an update i have ignored them both in work and have not said anything just to keep the peace on the block i work on.

 

The other night i finished work and went home, my ex finished an hour later than me and this friend had taken a few hours off and just so happened to finish work at the same time as my ex. Anyway i went to the shops after i got home (ten at night) and as i did i saw her driving into the area where me and ex live, she has no reason for going this way. I decided to check my exs address and found her car there. I was so angry i text them both. Long story short they came up with some story that she was picking up a golf club for her husband!!!

 

I am so angry that i did not wait outside the house and confront them but on the other hand i really wish i believed that nothing was going on. Is this enough proof to tell her husband x x

[Normaeinstein]

Tell her husband.

They are lying scumbags.

The texts are enough proof.

She's ruined your relationship, you should do the same to her and her husband also deserves the truth

[Shock Me Sane]

Tell her husband.

They are lying scumbags.

The texts are enough proof.

She's ruined your relationship, you should do the same to her and her husband also deserves the truth

 

Uh, no. Revenge is not a reason to throw a wrench into this girl's marriage.

 

Norma is apparently too bitter to view things objectively.

 

You don't know what's going on specifically in her relationship and it's none of your business. If you've split with this guy and you're living on your own, just leave it be. He doesn't want you knowing about his love life and you don't need to know.

[Javelin]

Uh, no. Revenge is not a reason to throw a wrench into this girl's marriage.

 

Norma is apparently too bitter to view things objectively.

 

You don't know what's going on specifically in her relationship and it's none of your business. If you've split with this guy and you're living on your own, just leave it be. He doesn't want you knowing about his love life and you don't need to know.

 

While you have a point,

 

In the end, her husband does have a right to know. He's being strung along and that's not cool. How would you feel in a situation where your marriage was on the rocks, yet your husband was out messing with another woman?

[Shock Me Sane]

If anything, I think she should tell the girl to tell her husband, as opposed to her talking to the husband directly.

[Javelin]

If anything, I think she should tell the girl to tell her husband, as opposed to her talking to the husband directly.

 

Even if she does confront the other woman, she's a liar right along with her ex-fiance. That said, it'll do the situation no good..

[coliflower]

To be honest i know that the relationship is over but would just like to know the truth but I know that neither of them will admit it. Her because of her marriage, him because he knows how much i hate cheaters.

I always think you should follow your gut and i do feel that they are still seeing each other.

However if she did have a young child i think i would tell her husband as she is being unfair to him by stringing him along and having the best of both worlds.

I am also looking for a new job to get away from them both now.

Thanks for everyones replies x

[Normaeinstein]

Wow Shock Me Sane.

Honesty and trust are very simple.

Cheaters are liars and that they don't deserve consideration.

[coliflower]

Hi Normaenstein, you are quite right there is no excuse for cheating, if something is not right in a relationship then i believe that you should either try to fix it or walk away!!

I have now come to accept that even if they have not physically cheated then emotional cheating is just as bad and both of them know my past.

I have decided that she is just not worth anymore of my time and effort and if they want to carry on then so be it. Im sure it wont be a happy affair!!!

Chip up to everyone on LS x