harmon25 Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 21 y/o male my ex broke up with me about 2 months ago we dated about 1.5 years. We are both seniors in college at the same school. So since the breakup 2 months ago we still talk because we've agreed to try and be friends. But small issues continue to come up, which seem to be out of frustration because we both have feelings still. So we get into texting battles when this happens. It happened again last night so I finally told her lets meet up in person and talk about things. She agreed so she's gonna come to my apt. sometime in the next few days. Any advice on topics to avoid or topics to promote in general? I know some things I want to say but the last thing I wanna do is fight with her. She also has a very hard time projecting her feelings so that will be hard too. I don't know how this convo. will end but I don't want bad terms...Any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
Excellent Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 21 y/o male my ex broke up with me about 2 months ago we dated about 1.5 years. We are both seniors in college at the same school. So since the breakup 2 months ago we still talk because we've agreed to try and be friends. But small issues continue to come up, which seem to be out of frustration because we both have feelings still. So we get into texting battles when this happens. It happened again last night so I finally told her lets meet up in person and talk about things. She agreed so she's gonna come to my apt. sometime in the next few days. Any advice on topics to avoid or topics to promote in general? I know some things I want to say but the last thing I wanna do is fight with her. She also has a very hard time projecting her feelings so that will be hard too. I don't know how this convo. will end but I don't want bad terms...Any advice? I think the best thing you can do is to be completely honest. Let her know what you want, and find out what she expects from you. Then you need to decide if you can meet those expectations or not. If not, i say end all communication. The friend-zone is not pretty. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 Personally, I'd end all communication until nothing she could possibly say would have any significant effect on you. Then, maybe, just maybe, be friends, though personally I could never see that happening. I'm not really angry at my wife (stbx) but I'm no more than cordial with her. We're not 'friends'. We likely never will be. There's no need. If we wanted to be with each other, we'd be married. Move on. You're young. Many young ladies around. Your ex isn't anything special, as a human being. She was just special to you for awhile. Link to post Share on other sites
mr heartbroken Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 to me it sounds like doubt and fear. yeah the chap before me said she is nothing special but to you she is!!!!! i think that if you are honest then it might scare her away. but the thing is if you are not honest then you will be hiding things from her and you will not really get what you want... For me be honest and if it doesent happen then you need to move on.... easy to say but hard to put into pratice i know.. sorry about the spelling never a strong point Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 With all their history and feelings so fresh, can any reasonable person see a friendly and cordial way to have any sort of meaningful discourse? Even if so, what will they talk about? Bowling? Remember, they're 'friends' now. Intimate subjects are verboten. Ah, you washed your car. The dog is looking spiffy. Grandma got out of the hospital. etc. etc. Trust me, nothing that is said nor any body language will be interpreted without a full historical import of emotion. It just won't. But, hey, you're young. Find out for yourself Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 21 y/o male my ex broke up with me about 2 months ago we dated about 1.5 years. We are both seniors in college at the same school. So since the breakup 2 months ago we still talk because we've agreed to try and be friends. But small issues continue to come up, which seem to be out of frustration because we both have feelings still. So we get into texting battles when this happens. It happened again last night so I finally told her lets meet up in person and talk about things. She agreed so she's gonna come to my apt. sometime in the next few days. Any advice on topics to avoid or topics to promote in general? I know some things I want to say but the last thing I wanna do is fight with her. She also has a very hard time projecting her feelings so that will be hard too. I don't know how this convo. will end but I don't want bad terms...Any advice? Dont talk about the breakup. Don't beg or plead. Don't ask questions about who she is dating/seeing/doing. Act like nothing is wrong, you're happy and what not. Link to post Share on other sites
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