Blue Engine Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Hi. I just need some advice. My husband is visiting his home state about 2500 miles away. Yesterday I came home with my 8 year-old daughter to find the house torn up and a lot of our stuff stolen (computers, cameras, jewelry, etc.). The burglars also left a butcher knife, a chisel and pruning shears laying on our chair and beds respectively. It's creepy. When I contacted my H, he said, "Is there anything I can do?" I asked him when he was coming home. He said by the weekend or Monday because he still hadn't seen everything he went there to see. I felt sick to my stomach when he told me that. I told him our eight year-old was scared and he said, "I can imagine." After I blew up at him, he said he would get an airplane ticket home. I told him not to bother. And I know he won't. We've been on-again- off-again for years. He doesn't hold a job or do much of anything. I think he just doesn't care. Any comments? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Adunaphel Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Is there any relative or close friend who could stay at your place until your H is back? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Blue Engine, if there are no relatives or friends you can stay with, consider a hotel or motel. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 If your husband doesn't come home immediately, then there's no point in staying married to him. THIS IS AN EMERGENGY. The burglars also left a butcher knife, a chisel and pruning shears laying on our chair and beds respectively. It's creepy Makes me wonder if he was up to no good behind your back... Do you think the break in has something to do with him cheating? Just seems quite personal. What have the Police said about this? Link to post Share on other sites
VictoryisMine Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 This thread is bothering me too. Please stay with family or friends for now. What HAVE the police said about this? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Blue Engine Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thank you, everyone. The police didn't provide much information. The officer dusted some items for fingerprints and said he would let us know if they arrested anyone. Today there were about 10 cops in my neighborhood. I'm hoping they arrested someone in connection with our burglary. But we haven't heard yet. I should add that we have dogs, and that wasn't a deterrent. That's scary. But, as crazy as it sounds, I don't take it personally. I know the theives were just out to make some easy money. I'm more concerned that my H doesn't seem to care enough about us--at least his daughter--to cut his vacation short. As for right now, I don't intend to take him back. Can anyone help me to understand? I feel like a fool. Link to post Share on other sites
VictoryisMine Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Of course he should come home immediately. Sick people left knives and shears on your bed, maybe now isn't the time to fight with him, let him come home. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 How can you NOT take it personally when knives, shears and a chisel was found inside your home? One thing to think about, and sorry to bring this up...But, if your dogs didn't bark, make alot of noise, enough that the neighbours didn't hear anything, it makes me wonder if the person is known to you or your husband. Especially your husband... Kind of like Fatal Attraction? Not saying he's cheating on you, but have you thought of this possiblity? Never say never. And VictoryisMine is right, sick people leave knives and stuff behind. Most criminals are just in and out and don't leave stuff weapons (could be considered as such in this case, I mean, what if you WERE home?) behind inside the house. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 I'm more concerned that my H doesn't seem to care enough about us--at least his daughter--to cut his vacation short. As for right now, I don't intend to take him back. Can anyone help me to understand? I feel like a fool. Actually, this is as clear an indication to you that his care and concern for you are secondary to his own requirements. I guess the fact that you're both alive and functioning means he thinks everything is ok, so why worry? It's an appalling attitude, and very hurtful. I agree you need to consider the implications of his (in) actions, and re-evaluate the situation. As a British person, may I ask an unconnected question? And really, this is just curiosity. Whatever became wrong with the simple word, "burgled"? Why has the word 'burglarized' been concocted, and found necessary? When and where did this word originate? Even the OP went on to use the term 'burglary' (as opposed, logically, to 'burglarization').... I can fully understand new words being invented where none existed before, but why change burgled to burglarized when the original term is perfectly adequate? "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"..... As a lingustically-interested proof-reader, I really am sincerely and genuinely interested. And it's also important with regard to editing and correcting, particularly as the word does not appear at all in any British dictionary concerning the skills of proof-reading and copy writing.... I sincerely apologise for inserting this as a public question in the thread, and would welcome PMs in response, to avoid the topic going further off. Blue engine, I hope you do not consider my input insulting, and I really do wish you strength, and hope you can find a way through this. I'm sorry about your H's attitude, and I too would be sincerely and seriously disturbed by his response. I wish you well. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
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